Re the previous messages: I totally agree with you that "Seeing everybody's perspective isn't easy & it's all so subjective. "Birth is a continuum of the rest of our life" is something I quote to many clients prenatally. I often think about the statistic that at least 1 in 4 girls have been sexually abused and ponder the rising caesarean rate. The vaginal experiences that women have are not just about birth. During physiological birth they are protected by their hormones to a certain extent. After the hormones wear off, the memory remains. Is it just the birth they are remembering or is it mixed up with other vaginal memories? We won't ever know, but lets not beat ourselves up about it. All community midwives have some clients who punish us for their birth experiences by refusing to pay our fee, bad mouthing us, or withdrawing abruptly from the midwife-woman relationship. Sometimes I can sympathize with the Obs for the rigid way they approach their work. At least it is consistent. Don't give up on your wonderful vocation. You are greatly treasured for your role in facilitating so many wonderful births. The babies thank you, MM
We facilitate a woman giving birth vaginally by giving her time to dilate, she feels she laboured too long & we are wrong because we didn't leap in & recommend a C/S . We recommend a C/S because we feel the labour is going nowhere & we are wrong again because she didn't get time to dilate ! We try to give her every chance to achieve her goal & we are wrong again because it wasn't as she'd planned. I feel I can't ever be right ! > This is an interesting thread that I must comment on again: > > With the consumer support I have been involved with for the many years I > have and just in the year I have been a doula, the definition of a > negative experience is so varied! What I would deem as a great natural > vaginal birth with no tears etc have been described as hideous by a few > women. I know women who have had a cs that were totally unwarranted but > LOVED them....what some think (rightly) as abuse can be accepted as > others as normal. > > The point being, people writing in about the trauma they suffered during > birth can encompass such a diversity of experiences. Who actually > defines what a negative experience is? Is it the care given by the MW > or OB or how they deliver that care? They could be a sweet as pie as > they cut peris for no more than routine reasons resulting in long term > incontinence issues. If the woman trusts them and likes them then is it > abuse? What if an arrogant or just a forthright OB or MW comes in and > demands a woman to get up off the bed and squat to birth which results > in the woman having intense ctx and a baby? Is the way she was spoken to > the determining factor or the fact that she was able to birth the baby > without the need of any needless medical intervention? > > Or perhaps the birth I was at last night would be a good example: > beautiful natural birth with a first time mum who had a small tear in > the vaginal wall and external surface tearing. She required suturing > which was done by the birth centre staff. Local was used but this woman > was so scarred and traumatized she screamed for 20 minutes like I have > never heard anyone scream before. Her pain was amplified by her fear > and the gas she used. We were trying to do the right thing by her but > never before have I felt like I had been involved with the assault on > another human being. She was being told by the two (wonderful) midwives > (so no insinuation of them being to blame for this as they were really > wonderful women) and her poor husband what to do and so on which scared > her and confused her more. I held her hand and let the tears run down > my face as she sobbed my name. Did we abuse her? How do we define what > is abuse on another? How does the people who we write to evaluate this? > How do we define what is unacceptable to me but fine with the woman > birthing in the other room? > > I don't like any medical person telling me what to do: suggestions and > advice is fine. But what about the woman who can not make decisions > without firm guidance? Is it guidance or is it authorative? There are > times when we all just want someone to make the decision for us as we > can not or don't know everything that we need to know to make the > decision. > > I am not adverse to writing inn with a complaint of a care provider. I > am in my eight year of letter writing and responding!! I KNOW that if > people don't write in a and say something then no changes can be > made...but again I come back to the diversity of perceptions. How do I > know the person reading my letters didn't have a baby die because no one > gave her a cs when needed? How is she going to respond to me bitching > about getting a cs for no reason? > > Sorry, rambling! Still processing last night and also catching up on > sleep. Another due last week so could go tonight! > Love Jo (B) > > -----Original Message----- > From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] > [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] On Behalf Of Justine > Caines > Sent: Sunday, November 20, 2005 1:19 PM > To: OzMid List > Subject: Re: [ozmidwifery] question - lodging complaints > > > Hi Jo and All > The disclaimer from what you have said was to indemnify the Ob from > responsibility of a stuff up and it was as a response to refusal to c/s > with that logic he has acted totally against the parents wishes by > performing that episiotomy. I think having signed that form they have > more to argue, ie they were making the decisions and taking > responsibility. They made it clear what their wishes were, the husband > asked him to stop and he did not. I believe he has a case to answer re > the evidence of 'cranial haemorrhage' etc etc and what benefit was > achieved through such an assault. > > It may be worthwhile contacting Andrew Bissets at John Hunter Hospital > re some facts (from an Ob) re vaginal breech as he has assisted over > 400, he may have some ammo re the epis. Let me know if you want his > e-mail. > > I agree with Andrea evey couple up to making a complaint should be > supported to. The former HCC Commissioner in NSW agreed with what we > said about the broken maternity system and yet said what can I do with > 13 complaints for 86,000 births! She had a point. > > JC > xxx > > > -- > This mailing list is sponsored by ACE Graphics. > Visit <http://www.acegraphics.com.au> to subscribe or unsubscribe. > > -- > Internal Virus Database is out-of-date. > Checked by AVG Free Edition. > Version: 7.1.362 / Virus Database: 267.12.8/162 - Release Date: > 11/5/2005 > > > -- > No virus found in this outgoing message. > Checked by AVG Free Edition. > Version: 7.1.362 / Virus Database: 267.13.4/175 - Release Date: > 11/18/2005 > > -- > This mailing list is sponsored by ACE Graphics. > Visit <http://www.acegraphics.com.au> to subscribe or unsubscribe. > -- This mailing list is sponsored by ACE Graphics. Visit <http://www.acegraphics.com.au> to subscribe or unsubscribe. -- This mailing list is sponsored by ACE Graphics. Visit <http://www.acegraphics.com.au> to subscribe or unsubscribe.
