Hi Marc,

Thank you very much for the feedback. See inline.

> -----Original Message-----
> From: [email protected] [mailto:[email protected]] On Behalf Of
> Marc Petit-Huguenin
> Sent: Wednesday, September 26, 2012 12:52 AM
> To: Rosen, Brian
> Cc: P2PSIP WG
> Subject: Re: [P2PSIP] WGLC for draft-ietf-p2psip-diagnostics-09
> 
> -----BEGIN PGP SIGNED MESSAGE-----
> Hash: SHA256
> 
> I carefully read this I-D, and I found a lot of nits, which make it difficult
> to read.  I think that this draft is ready to be submitted to the IESG, but I
> would like to start a discussion on one specific point, security.
> 

Thanks, the document will double checked and updated.

> The draft is very light on the discussion about who is authorized to do what.
>  Obviously some of the information that can be requested are sensitive, and I
> am afraid that without having a mechanism for authorization in the document,
> implementers will be reluctant to add it to their implementation.  

Good point!

>I think
> especially of SOFTWARE_VERSION, but there can be future Diagnostics Kinds that
> are not for general availability.
  So I would suggest to define in the spec an
> additional mechanism to restrict the access to some Kinds:
> 
> The idea would be to add an extension in the configuration file to authorize
> access to these Diagnostics Kinds only to a specific list of Node-IDs (in a
> similar way that signer node-IDs are authorized to sign kind and configuration
> elements in signer and king-signer elements.
> 

This should work. Could this lead to the over dynamic of the configuration 
file? Another option is for each Kind, just stored these signed IDs as a value 
in the overlay.

BR,
-Haibin

> 
> Nits
> ====
> 
> - - The title, abstract and section 1 uses the acronym "P2PSIP", but in fact
> what is described is not limited to P2PSIP (i.e. the usage of
> draft-ietf-p2psip-sip) but can be applied to any usage of RELOAD.  So I would
> recommend to change P2PSIP to P2P.
> 
> - - Section 4:  Path_Track
> 
> This is used inconsistently in the whole document.  I would suggest to change
> it to PathTrack everywhere, with the request structure named PathTrackReq and
> the answer PathTrackAns.  The message code names (path_track_req and
> path_track_ans) are correct.
> 
> - - The meaning of peer, node and client is well defined in
> draft-ietf-p2psip-base, but the usage of these words is not consistent in this
> document.  I would suggest to check every instance and change them if
> needed.
>  For example in Section 4, last paragraph, "... must be only provided to
> authorized peers."  should be "... must be only provided to authorized
> nodes.", and so on...
> 
> - - Section 4.2, last paragraph:  "There have been proposal on the list..."
> 
> This kind of language probably does not have its place in a normative section.
>  Move this to an annex.
> 
> - - Section 4.3:  Move to an Annex (see above)
> 
> - - Section 5.1.1, title:
> 
> s/DiagnosticRequest/DiagnosticsRequest/
> 
> - - Section 5.1.1, structure:
> 
> I think that this would make it clearer that there can be more than one
> DiagnosticExtension:
> 
> enum { (2^16-1) } DiagnosticExtensionRequestType;
> 
> struct {
>     DiagnosticExtensionRequestType type;
>     opaque  diagnostic_extension_contents<0..2^32-1>;
> } DiagnosticExtension;
> 
> struct {
>     uint64 expiration;
>     uint64 timestamp_initiated;
>     uint64 dMFlags;
>     DiagnosticExtension diagnostic_extensions<0..2^32-1>;
> } DiagnosticsRequest;
> 
> - - Section 5.1.1, 7th paragraph "the flags can be extended by standard 
> action."
> 
> Add a cross reference to the correct subsection in section 9 (IANA
> Considerations).
> 
> - - Section 5.1.2, title:
> 
> s/DiagnosticResponse/DiagnosticsResponse/
> 
> - - Section 5.1.3, second paragraph:
> 
> s/and other bits Must be cleared/nd other bits must be cleared/
> 
> - - Section 5.1.3:
> 
> I would suggest to provide the structure (in the presentation language defined
> by RELOAD section 6.3.1) for all the types defined in this section, if
> interoperability between implementations is wanted.
> 
> - - Section 5.1.3: SOFTWARE_VERSION:  I would suggest to change the example
> to
> something more anonymous.  As for the format itself, this draft may be of some
> help:
> 
> http://www.ietf.org/internet-drafts/draft-karcz-uuas-00.txt
> 
> - - Section 5.1.3: MACHINE_UPTIME
> 
> s/the nodes has been/the node has been/
> 
> - - Section 5.1.3: MEMORY-FOOTPRINT
> 
> s/32 -bit/32-bit/
> 
> - - Section 5.1.3: INSTANCES_STORED
> 
> s/The array is index by/The array is indexed by/
> 
> - - Section 5.1.3: UNDERLAY_HOP
> 
> s/for diagnostics purpose./for diagnostics purpose)./
> 
> - - Section 5.1.4, 2nd paragraph
> 
> s/Editor's Note: The self-tuning/The self-tuning/
> 
> - - Section 5.2, second paragraph
> 
> s/Section 5.3.3/Section 6.3.3/
> 
> - - Section 5.2, third paragraph: "If a peer does not extend the 
> extension,..."
> 
> Does not make sense.
> 
> - - Section 5.3, second paragraph
> 
> s/Route_Query/RouteQuery/
> 
> - - Section 5.3.1
> 
> s/compressed id/opaque ID/
> 
> - - Section 5.5.1, first paragraph, "The sender MUST include the dMFlags 
> field"
> 
> This field is not longer optional, so this text is useless.
> 
> - - Section 5.5.1, first paragraph, "...but MUST include the field"
> 
> Same than above.
> 
> - - Section 5.5.1, second paragraph
> 
> s/diagnostic ping/diagnostic Ping/
> 
> - - Section 5.5.1, 2nd and 3rd paragraphs:
> 
> s/NodeId/Node-ID/
> s/ResourceID/Resource-ID/
> 
> - - Section 5.5.2, second paragraph "contain the Error code followed by the
> subcode..."
> 
> What is this subcode?
> 
> - - Section 5.5.3, 3rd paragraph "will represent 100-hops"
> 
> Where does this 100-hops come from?
> 
> - - Section 5.5.3, 5th paragraph "subcode and description"
> 
> What is this subcode?
> 
> - - Section 5.5.3, 5th paragraph
> 
> s/with the Error Code 1 "Error_Unauthorized"./with the Error Code 2
> Error_Forbidden./
> 
> - - Section 5.5.4, 2nd paragraph:
> 
> Remove this paragraph.
> 
> - - Section 5.5.4, 3rd paragraph:
> 
> s/Inspect/PathTrack/
> 
> - - Section 6.1
> 
> s/WEMA_BYTES_RCVD/EWMA_BYTES_RCVD/
> 
> - - Section 6.2
> 
> s/StatusInfo/STATUS_INFO/
> 
> - - Section 6.3
> 
> s/Inspect/PathTrack/
> s/InspectReq/PathTrackReq/
> 
> - - Section 9
> 
> I find the way the registries are organized makes them difficult to 
> understand.
> 
> It would be better to have one registry merging 9.1, 9.2 and 9.6, with the
> following columns:
> 
> - - Diagnostic Kind Type (from 9.2, same than diagnostic information from 9.6)
> - - diagnostic flag (from 9.6, can be empty)
> - - Code (from 9.2)
> - - Diagnostic Extension Name (from 9.1, can be empty)
> - - Code (from 9.1, empty if the previous cell is empty)
> - - Specification (from 9.1, 9.2 and 9.6)
> 
> Another alternative is to have one registry for the dMFlags kinds, and another
> for the extensions Kinds, and perhaps use different RFC 5226 requirements.
> 
> Private and experimental uses should also be documented.
> 
> 
> On 09/17/2012 10:18 AM, Rosen, Brian wrote:
> > We are issuing a two week Working Group Last Call for
> > draft-ietf-p2psip-diagnostics-09.
> >
> > Please send comments to the list, including any statements you may have
> > about the readiness of this document to be published.
> >
> > WGLC will close on October 2.
> >
> 
> - --
> Marc Petit-Huguenin
> Email: [email protected]
> Blog: http://blog.marc.petit-huguenin.org
> Profile: http://www.linkedin.com/in/petithug
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