TOP TEN REASONS GOD CREATED EVE
10. God worried that Adam would always be lost in the garden because�
men hate to ask for directions.�
9. God knew that Adam would one day need someone to hand him the TV�
remote. (Men don't want to see what's ON television, they want
to see WHAT ELSE is on!)�
8. God knew that Adam would never buy a new fig leaf when his seat wore�
out and would therefore need Eve to get one for him.�
7. God knew that Adam would never make a doctor's appointment for�
himself.�
6. God knew that Adam would never remember which night was garbage
night.
5. God knew that if the world was to be populated, men would never be
able to handle childbearing.�
4. As "Keeper of the Garden," Adam would never remember where he put
his tools.�
3. The scripture account of creation indicates Adam needed someone to
blame his troubles on when God caught him hiding in the garden.�
2. As the Bible says, "It is not good for man to be alone!"�
1. When God finished the creation of Adam, He stepped back, scratched
His head and said, "I can do better than that."�
---Indi Soemardjan <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
> Because I'm a guy...
>
> Because I'm a guy, I must hold the television remote control in my
hand
> while
> I watch TV. If the thing has been misplaced, I'll miss a whole show
> looking
> for it, though one time I was able to survive by holding a calculator.
>
> Because I'm a guy, when I lock my keys in the car I will fiddle with a
> wire
> clothes hanger and ignore your suggestions that we call a road service
> until
> long after hypothermia has set in. Oh, and when the car isn't running
> very
> well, I will pop the hood and stare at the engine as if I know what
I'm
> looking at. If another guy shows up, one of us will say to the other,
> "I used
> to be able to fix these things, but now with all these computers and
> everything, I wouldn't know where to start." We will then drink beer.
>
> Because I'm a guy, when I catch a cold I need someone to bring me soup
> and
> take care of me while I lie in bed and moan. You never get as sick
as I
> do,
> so for you this isn't an issue.
>
> Because I'm a guy, I can be relied upon to purchase basic groceries at
> the
> store, like milk, or bread. I cannot be expected to find exotic items
> like
> "Cumin" or "Tofu." For all I know these are the same thing. And
never,
> under any circumstances, expect me to pick up anything for which
> "feminine
> hygiene product" is a euphemism.
>
> Because I'm a guy, when one of our appliances stops working I will
> insist on
> taking it apart, despite evidence that this will just cost me twice as
> much
> once the repair person gets here and has to put it back together.
>
> Because I'm a guy, I don't think we're all that lost, and no, I don't
> think we
> should stop and ask someone. Why would you listen to a complete
> stranger--how
> the heck could HE know where we're going?
>
> Because I'm a guy, there is no need to ask me what I'm thinking about.
> The
> answer is always either sex or football, though I have to make up
> something
> else when you ask, so don't.
>
> Because I'm a guy, I do not want to visit your mother, or have your
> mother
> come visit us, or talk to her when she calls, or think about her any
> more than
> I have to. Whatever you got her for mother's day is ok, I don't
need to
> see
> it. Did you remember to pick up something for my mom, too?
>
> Because I'm a guy, I am capable of announcing, "one more beer and I
> really
> have to go," and mean it every single time I say it, even when it gets
> to the
> point that the one bar closes and my buddies and I have to go hunt
down
> another. I will find it increasingly hilarious to have my pals call
you
> to
> tell you I'll be home soon, and no, I
> don't understand why you threw all my clothes into the front yard.
> What's the connection?
>
> Because I'm a guy, you don't have to ask me if I liked the movie.
> Chances
> are, if you're crying at the end of it, I didn't.
>
> Because I'm a guy, yes, I have to turn up the radio when Bruce
> Springsteen or
> The Doors comes on, and then, yes, I have to tell you every single
time
> about
> how Bruce had his picture on the cover of Time and Newsweek the same
> day, or
> how Jim Morrison is buried in Paris and everyone visits his grave.
> Please do
> not behave as if you do not find this fascinating.
>
> Because I'm a guy, I think what you're wearing is fine. I thought
what
> you
> were wearing five minutes ago was fine, too. Either pair of shoes is
> fine.
> With the belt or without it looks fine. Your hair is fine. You look
> fine.
> Can we just go now?
>
> Because I'm a guy and this is, after all, the 90's, I will share
equally
> in
> the housework. You do the laundry, the cooking, the cleaning, and the
> dishes.
> I'll do the rest.
>
>
> Helen Alexander
> Student Exchanges and Study Abroad
> Admissions and Registrar's Office
> James Annex
>
_________________________________________________________
DO YOU YAHOO!?
Get your free @yahoo.com address at http://mail.yahoo.com
