An old man goes to a church, and is making a confession:
Man: "Father, I am 75 years old. I have been married for 50 years. All 
these years I had been faithful to my wife, but yesterday I was intimate 
with an 18 year old." 
Father: "When was the last time you made a confession?" 
Man: "I never have, I am Jewish." 
Father: "Then why are telling me all this?" 
Man: "I’m telling everybody!"
---
Three nuns are talking. The first nun says, "I was cleaning in Father's 
room the other day and do you know what I found? A bunch of pornographic 
magazines." "What did you do?" the other nun asks. "Well, of course I threw 
them in the trash." The second nun says, "Well, I can top that. I was in 
Father's room putting away the laundry and I found a bunch of condoms!" "Oh 
my!" gasp the other nuns. "What did you do?" they ask. "I poked holes in 
all of them!" she replies. The third nun faints.
---
Four nuns are in line to go into heaven. God asks the first nun if she has 
ever sinned. She says, "Well, I've seen a penis." So God puts holy water on 
her eyes and lets her enter. He asks the second nun the same thing and she 
says, "I've held a penis," so he puts holy water on her hands and lets her 
enter. Then the fourth nun skips the third nun in line and God asks why she 
did that. The 4th nun replies, "Well, I need to gargle it before she sits 
in it."
---
A man gets on a bus, and ends up sitting next to a very attractive nun. 
Enamored with her, he asks if he can have sex with her. Naturally, she says 
no, and gets off the bus. The man goes to the bus driver and asks him if he 
knows of a way for him to have sex with the nun. "Well," says the bus 
driver, "every night at 8 o'clock, she goes to the cemetery to pray. If you 
dress up as God, I'm sure you could convince her to have sex with you." The 
man decides to try it, and dresses up in his best God costume. At eight, he 
sees the nun and appears before her. "Oh, God!" she exclaims. "Take me with 
you!" The man tells the nun that she must first have sex with him to prove 
her loyalty. The nun says yes, but tells him she prefers anal sex. Before 
you know it, they're getting down to it, having nasty, grunty, loud sex. 
After it's over, the man pulls off his God disguise. "Ha, ha!" he says, 
"I'm the man from the bus!" "Ha, ha!" says the nun, removing her costume, 
"I'm the bus driver!"
---
Mother superior tells two new nuns that they have to paint their room 
without getting any paint on their clothes. One nun suggests to the other, 
"Hey, let's take all our clothes off, fold them up, and lock the door." So 
they do this, and begin painting their room. Soon they hear a knock at the 
door. They ask, "Who is it?" "Blind man!" The nuns look at each other and 
one nun says, "He's blind, so he can't see. What could it hurt?" They let 
him in. The blind man walks in and says, "Hey, nice tits. Where do you want 
me to hang the blinds?"
---
Maria, a devout Catholic, got married and had 15 children. After her first 
husband died, she remarried and had 15 more children. A few weeks after her 
second husband died, Maria also passed away. At Maria's funeral, the priest 
looked skyward and said, "At last, they're finally together." Her sister 
sitting in the front row said, "Excuse me, Father, but do you mean she and 
her first husband, or she and her second husband?" The priest replied, "I 
mean her legs."

On Friday, October 14, 2016 at 1:24:36 PM UTC-5, plainolamerican wrote:
>
> [image: Image result for hillary clinton zionist]
>
>
> On Friday, October 14, 2016 at 12:52:22 PM UTC-5, gtheist957 wrote:
>>
>> You've done better plain ole 
>>
>> On Oct 14, 2016 12:32 PM, "plainolamerican" <plainol...@gmail.com> wrote:
>>
>>> [image: The cartoonist's homepage, freep.com/opinion/mike-thompson]
>>> [image: The cartoonist's homepage, azcentral.com/opinions/benson]
>>> [image: The cartoonist’s homepage, pnj.com/opinion]
>>> [image: The cartoonist's homepage, greenvilleonline.com/opinion]
>>> [image: The cartoonist's homepage, courier-journal.com/opinion]
>>> [image: The cartoonist's homepage, news-press.com/opinion]
>>> [image: The cartoonist’s homepage, pnj.com/opinion]
>>> [image: The cartoonist’s homepage, pnj.com/opinion]
>>>
>>>
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