cuma info aja neh, kalo gak salah ada buku john Gray PhD soal penelitian itu...
--- In [email protected], "Nur Rochman" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > Setahu saya dari penelitian semoga nggak salah, rata-rata akal manusia > laki-laki itu sembilan bagian rasional sedangkan satu bagian emosional > sedangkan pada wanita itu kebalikannya sembilan bagian emosional dan satu > bagian rasional, tapi nggak tahu kalau sekarang berubah. > Tapi apakah itu menjadikan laki-laki lebih realistis dari pada perempuan > atau sebaliknya harus melalui riset lagi. > Siapa yang lagi kuliah dipsikologi bisa tuch buat dipelajari dan share ke > kita, pengaruh gender terhadap tingkat realistis seseorang hehehe..... > > Regards, > > Oman > > -----Original Message----- > From: faris ahmad [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] > Sent: Wednesday, March 23, 2005 9:35 AM > To: [email protected] > Subject: RE: [ppiindia] Re: 'You can never be strong enough' > > > > Sori, out of topic. Saya punya pertanyaan, yang mungkin teman-teman bisa > menjawab: Siapa yang lebih realistis dalam memandang hidup, pria atau > wanita? > > Nur Rochman <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:Repot amat sich pake' bahasa > inggris, perlakuan buruk perempuan olem kaum > laki-laki didaerah timur tengah dan daerah lain itu nggak ada hubungannya > sama agama tetapi pengaruh tradisi baik arab, jawa dll, bukankah agama > samawi semua muncul dari timur tengah baik yahudi, nasrani dan islam jadi > bibitnya dari lingkungan yang sama arab!!! > So buruknya implemenmtasi suatu ajaran agama itu sangat tergantung dengan > ulama dan masyarakatnya sendiri dalam menterjemahkan agama itu dalam > kehidupan sehari-hari, agamanya sendiri sich nggak ada yang salah... > > Regards, > > Oman > > -----Original Message----- > From: Ida Z.A [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] > Sent: Wednesday, March 23, 2005 8:38 AM > To: [email protected] > Subject: [ppiindia] Re: 'You can never be strong enough' > > > > > Do christianity and judaism truly offer women a better treatment than > islam does? > > i think, its not easy to search for and find answers (to these > difficult questions). the first difficulty is the one has to be fair > and objective. > > > --- In [email protected], Carla Annamarie > <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > > > > i think in many middle east countries where they re bound with > customs and > > traditions which men is the ruler, the superior-being and women is > only > > men's property, women is a weaker being (inferior) not an equal > partner.., > > since childhood her rights re determined by her familly (Father and > > brothers), her familly will arrange her marriage with someone that > she's > > barely knew.., and after the married her husband is the sole > proprietor of > > her.., womens have a very fragile status, she's not protected under > law, > > bcs according to law her husband is her protector, so if she got > divorce, > > things becomes worse bcs socially she's an outcast from her familly > and her > > social community, dont ever think abt child support from the > husband..it's > > impossible, even she has to fight her right to keep her child.., > > if many of them works indecent job liked a belly dancer..bcs they > re lack > > or less opportunity for them for a good job..esp bcs they re a > divorcee..in > > spite of that i admire them..bcs despite of terrible things that > happened > > to them, they survived.. > > perhaps they can never be strong enough to handle it by them > self..but in > > my point of view they can do better..they prove it that they really > can do > > better..without men..:)).. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > "Ambon" > > > <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> To: <Undisclosed- > Recipient:;> > > > cc: > > 03/23/2005 02:45 Subject: > [ppiindia] 'You can never be strong enough' > > > AM > > > Please respond > to > > > ppiindia > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > 17 - 23 March 2005 > > Issue No. 734 > > Living > > > > Published in Cairo by AL-AHRAM established in 1875 > > > > > > > > > > > > http://weekly.ahram.org.eg/2005/734/li1.htm > > > > 'You can never be strong enough' > > As the number of single mothers continues to rise, Serene > Assir > > listens to accounts of tragedy, hope and heroism > > > > ------------------------------------------------------------------ -- > ---- > > Click to view caption > > Dina Sarhan explaining the fine points of cooking > > ------------------------------------------------------------------ > > > > Egyptian tradition is such that few things are worse than > being a > > single woman -- except, perhaps, being a single mother. And though > cases of > > unmarried women single-handedly raising children remain rare in > Egypt, > > those of divorced or widowed women bearing the economic, social and > > emotional brunt of parenthood are countless. Many take on the role > of both > > parents while the father moves in with a second wife, serves a > prison > > sentence, works abroad or completes up to three years of military > draft. > > > > "Problems are particularly acute in the case of women > raising > > children in economically depressed areas," Mona Shadi, programme > > coordinator for the Association for the Development and Enhancement > of > > Women (ADEW) told Al-Ahram Weekly. "The women we reach out to often > lack > > all the basic guarantees to which the state entitles them. Many > cannot read > > or write, many others lack identity cards since they are registered > under > > the name of their former husbands, and thus they have no access at > all to > > the authorities -- never mind the ability to seek help." > > > > "This world is a dirty place," 23-year-old Ashraqat, mother > of > > Shurouq, says with a mixture of fervour and despair. Ashraqat > discovered > > she was pregnant one month after signing her divorce papers, > following a > > brief but abusive stint of wedlock, during which her husband took > advantage > > of her economically even as he forced social restrictions on her. > Now, she > > lives in Cairo, having left her native village of Bilbis in the > Sharqiya > > district, but earns her living as a belly dancer in Hurghada > nightclubs, > > where she can work without the necessary documentation. > > > > "I remember when he used to promise me we would make our > dreams > > come true," she told the Weekly. "Now I know the truth." (While we > have > > this conversation in a traditional coffee house, the owner shakes > his head > > at me disapprovingly, walking by; later he tells me off for sitting > with > > someone so "low"). > > > > Ashraqat went to school up to the age of 14, and was dancing > > professionally by 15. The man she loved came from a better-off > family, so > > when she was married she imagined she would no longer have to dance > (or > > otherwise employ her body) to make a living. "But my husband would > bring > > clients into the house, then take the money afterwards. I had > everything I > > could possibly want, I even had a really nice mobile phone, but he > took > > control of my life and made me do things I didn't want to do. > > > > "By the time I discovered I was pregnant it was too late. > When I > > told my mother, she beat me -- she'd been against the marriage > since the > > beginning. But she was to forgive me later on, and now she helps > me. My > > father, well -- he treats me and my daughter like strangers. That's > okay. I > > don't need anyone, I can manage without. Now you ask me whether I'd > do it > > all over again? No. I'd marry the person my parents choose, someone > with > > money. It wouldn't matter whether I loved him or not. This is no > life..." > > > > This bitterness, the sense of being excluded, Shadi > explains, tend > > to be incorporated into the way single mothers bring up their > daughters -- > > an added problem. As if to confirm this, Ashraqat explains > that "what I > > teach my daughter is this: If someone picks on you, hit him. You > can never > > be strong enough." ADEW seeks to address this issue by holding > programmes > > for children as well as mothers, Shadi goes on to point out: "We > frequently > > succeed, but just as frequently we fail." > > > > Ashraqat's experience, though an extreme example, remains > broadly > > relevant. "As a divorc��e," she explains, "I am desired by many > men, because > > they know that I am not a virgin, and as a result they think I'm an > easy > > target. But everything I do," she pleads, "I swear, though I know > dancing > > is sinful -- I do it for Shurouq, so that when she grows up she has > all the > > things that I didn't have. I love her..." > > > > Such an attitude of self-sacrifice is seen across the > board. It may > > be innate in all mothers, but it stands out with particular force > in those > > who undergo the most painful trials. "When the children's father > passed > > away," Um Sherif, 67, tells the Weekly, "my life was already > difficult > > enough. God, I had 14 children to take care of!" Eight were hers, > the rest > > her husband's -- by his first wife. "The youngest was just two > years old. > > Now," she says, "they all have homes of their own, and they are all > happy." > > > > Um Sherif lives in a semi-agricultural area deep within one > of > > Cairo's poorer districts. She can neither read nor write, but three > of her > > sons are electronic engineers in the Gulf, and two work in > respectable > > businesses in Cairo. > > > > Hers is an impressive case: She fought against all odds to > raise > > her children, and she managed extraordinarily well. A strong woman, > she is > > proud of her achievements. "I never accepted help from anyone. I > knew that > > if my children were to be happy, I would have to do it all by > myself. I > > thought of remarrying, but when I saw how prospective husbands > would seek > > to interfere in the upbringing of my children, I decided against > it." > > > > But according to social perceptions, it is a misfortune for > a woman > > to remain unmarried. "Yes dear," Um Sherif says, defiantly, "but if > you > > listen to what people say, you'll find it impossible to breathe. I > learned > > this very early on in life. People love to interfere, but in order > to > > survive you must do what you feel is right." > > > > That said, social prejudice cannot be ignored as a negative > factor > > in the lives of single mothers. "My sister is a teacher," Mervat > told the > > Weekly, "and has always been well-to-do. She divorced her husband > following > > an unhappy marriage, and brought up her son and daughter > comfortably, > > without experiencing pressure from anyone. It was her son who turned > > against her in the end -- once he married, he started despising her, > > cursing the fact that she chose to live independently." > > > > Yet the principal problem seems to stem from an area beyond > the > > social, strictly speaking. A woman raising children on her own is a > woman > > without support in Egypt, and though this is increasingly > acceptable at the > > social level -- women gain in respect, particularly, as they grow > older -- > > bureaucratic issues stand in the way of true emancipation. Tasks as > banal > > as renting a flat become a problem because business deals are > usually made > > with men. Registering a child under the mother's name remains > legally > > impossible. > > > > "And now," Ashraqat says, about to set out for > Hurghada, "I've got > > to make sure I'm ready for the big lie: When the policeman wakes me > up > > while we're on the bus to ask for my ID, I'm just going to have to > pretend > > I'm too exhausted to fetch it. And as I'm not wearing any makeup, > he'll > > hopefully be taken in by the innocence of my expression. Let's just > pray > > he'll leave me alone." > > > > Shurouq looks beautiful in the photographs Ashraqat shows > me. To > > this day, without an ID card, the mother is fighting out the case > for the > > custody of her child. > > > > > > > > > > > > [Non-text portions of this message have been removed] > > > > > > > > ------------------------ Yahoo! Groups Sponsor ------------------- - > ~--> > > Give the gift of life to a sick child. > > Support St. Jude Children's Research Hospital's 'Thanks & Giving.' > > http://us.click.yahoo.com/lGEjbB/6WnJAA/E2hLAA/BRUplB/TM > > ------------------------------------------------------------------ -- > ~-> > > > > > ********************************************************************** > ***** > > Berdikusi dg Santun & Elegan, dg Semangat Persahabatan. Menuju > Indonesia yg > > Lebih Baik, in Commonality & Shared Destiny. www.ppi-india.uni.cc > > > ********************************************************************** > ***** > > > ______________________________________________________________________ > ____ > > Mohon Perhatian: > > > > 1. 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