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**http://www.arabnews.com/?page=9&d=14&m=2&y=2006&pix=community.jpg&category=Features
Tuesday, 14, February, 2006 (15, Muharram, 1427)
Courageous US Woman Builds Bridges of Understanding
Siraj Wahab, Arab News
Sonia "Tita" Puopolo had thought little about Saudi Arabia until
her mother boarded a flight that was diverted into the Twin Towers of the World
Trade Center on Sept. 11, 2001. (AN photo by Mohammed Salim Habib)
JEDDAH, 14 February 2006 - Tita, a young American woman, is a little
self-conscious about her abaya and fidgets with it as she sits with Dr. J.
Gregory Payne of the Saudi-American Exchange program and Arab News during lunch
on the sidelines of the Jeddah Economic Forum.
It is the second trip to the Kingdom for Sonia "Tita" Puopolo. Born in
Boston to an Italian-American father and a Puerto Rican mother, she had thought
little about Saudi Arabia until her mother boarded a flight that was diverted
into the Twin Towers of the World Trade Center on Sept. 11, 2001. Her mother's
seat was two rows in front of Muhammad Atta, the leader of the hijackers
hand-picked to drive a wedge between the people of the United States and Saudi
Arabia. Puopolo's visits are a testimony to her personal courage and proof that
Atta and his gang of terrorists have failed in their mission.
"I feel that nothing is by coincidence - that everything is God-sent,"
Puopolo told Arab News. "I really feel that something between God and my mother
guided me to be here and be involved with the Saudi-American Exchange program.
The program is aimed at grass roots diplomacy efforts and people-to-people
communication so that we can better understand each other, respect one
another's values and views and, therefore, further peace, understanding and
tolerance - tolerance of different cultures and cultural backgrounds in this
particular region of the Middle East. For me in particular, my mother was very
involved in philanthropy in the US. She emphasized how important it was for
tolerance. I feel that there is a real need for that in this region."
That doesn't mean coming to the Kingdom was easy for her. "I was nervous
about being here as the first 9/11 family member," Puopolo said. "Things run
through your mind. I myself am so open, but I think of those who are still
unconscious, so unaware. They couldn't even begin to understand why women wear
the abayas and the men wear these beautiful white gowns. It is just a way of
being. In life, we all have our perceptions of things. We learn to perceive
things. If we shift our perceptions then we can live in a more peaceful
existence."
She says the exchange program is about changing those perceptions. "There
are a lot of misconceptions, and I think that when you come here, you see that
things are not as one might imagine before coming here - terrorists running
around scheming and plotting. I think that somehow people in the States have
the feeling that bombs are going off because of the war in Iraq and the current
climate of the region. Some people believe that things might just blow up
anytime here."
She found that the reality is far different. "They (the Saudis) are warm
people, giving and caring, generous with their hearts and minds," Puopolo said.
"Family is very important. I have always felt that there are certain common
values. So I guess my first impression when I arrived here was that I didn't
realize how family-oriented the people were. I feel that their emphasis is on
values - good family values. I didn't know it was going to be so great."
When asked how she could visit Saudi Arabia after such a tremendous and
personal loss, she gave a response from which we all could learn. "Hate is a
very negative emotion," Puopolo said. "I don't have it in my blood to hate
anyone or anything. Perhaps that is what gave me the courage and strength to
come here."
She says the terrorists exacted more of a toll on mankind than they did
on the United States. "We need to remember that there were Saudis who were
killed on Sept. 11 in the Towers," said Puopolo. "I met a gentleman whose uncle
was born here but lived in the United States for 20 years. He was in one of the
offices in the Towers on that fateful day. So we have to remember that the
world was affected by this - the world in terms of humanity, not just the
Americans. Humanity suffered. So really I believe that it is up to humanity to
take that step toward change and understanding and learn to live in a more
peaceful way."
When asked about the Danish cartoon controversy, Puopolo defended free
speech without dismissing Islamic sensitivities. "How would a Catholic react if
he saw a cross burning?" Puopolo asked. "I don't mean they will respond the way
Hamas reacted, but I think that any hate news or hate propaganda or hate
message is wrong, and any violence in response to that hate message is very,
very wrong. Free speech - we embrace that - but free speech is not hate speech.
You have to use free speech responsibly. If you are defending what we all know
- that Islam is peaceful - then this violent reaction has had entirely the
opposite effect."
Dr. Payne had a different perspective on the cartoons and the underlying
causes of the unrest. "Cartoons are in some respects only another ember in the
fire," he told Arab News. "The cartoons are examples of people looking for
whatever to react to something that is deeper than that. There has been a lack
of communication because we have relied on stereotypes. I think what happens is
people loiter on the streets rather than coming together to say 'This is
offensive to me. Why did you do it?'"
When asked about bias in the Western media, Dr. Payne noted that Arabs
have failed to capitalize on opportunities in order to create a level-playing
field. "It's always easy to complain that there is this lobby or that lobby in
the US media. Are there Jewish-Americans involved in the American media? Yes,"
Dr. Payne said. "Why is the Arab elite not involved in that?
Sixty-dollar-a-barrel oil doesn't suggest that it is because you don't have the
liquidity. Yes, you have to put money into reforms. Reforms are important, but
part of that reform has to do with media literacy - to become active. Because
Saudi Arabia is a superpower in terms of energy, it should also strive to be a
superpower in terms of understanding and invest in human capital, invest in
leadership. Saudis have to be directly involved in this if their image is to be
corrected. Outsiders can help - but only up to a point."
Dr. Payne says there is a need to grow on both sides of the world. "I
think we need to learn to use the media responsibly, and, as Sonia has said,
people who really want to bridge the gap have to be committed to equally
allocating resources to groups such as the one we do to sponsor dialogue - to
sponsor discussions," Dr. Payne said. "The goal is further understanding. We
live in a world that is technologically connected. Instantaneously, we know
what happens anywhere. We don't use that technology in an efficient manner."
If Puopolo's visit is any indication, then the Saudi-American Exchange
has a great potential to heal the wounds between the two countries and renew
the strong bonds of friendship that have existed between Saudi Arabia and the
United States for more than half a century.
"Everyone has touched me with their warmth, especially women," Puopolo
said. "The camaraderie among women is great; there is this beautiful
connectedness. My message is live, love and laugh. Let's move forward toward a
more loving and caring world. We share common emotions - love, pain and
laughter. I welcome anyone who is ready to step up in bridging that gap. My
loss was huge. My mother was my everything. To make sense of 9/11 and to ensure
that it doesn't happen again, we should be joining together to bridge the gap
and take practical steps. Talk is cheap; action is required. Actions speak
louder than words."
For more information on the Saudi-American Exchange program, visit its
website at www.saudiamericanexchange.org
.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
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Lebih Baik, in Commonality & Shared Destiny.
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