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**http://www.arabnews.com/?page=1§ion=0&article=78514&d=28&m=2&y=2006
Tuesday, 28, February, 2006 (29, Muharram, 1427)
Wives in Limbo Seek Court Help
Arab News
RIYADH, 28 February 2006 - Consider it a Saudi version of a
pre-nuptial agreement. More and more often, Saudi women are establishing their
legal rights to file for divorce prior to tying the knot. What is even stranger
is the reason behind it, which is unusual in Saudi society. We are living in a
society that does not discuss such things, let alone ask for them, Al-Riyadh
reported.
A marriage contract that includes a clause or clauses setting
out circumstances under which a woman can divorce her husband is something new.
If it is signed and witnessed before the marriage, both parties are bound by it
and it gives the woman a right to divorce her husband if she chooses. At
present many women have been left by their husbands - not divorced but simply
deserted. In such cases, the woman is theoretically still married but in fact
she is not. She is in a kind of limbo and many women find themselves in this
limbo for many years.
Another problem is that women often face long legal
procedures when they file for divorce; they must convince the judge of the
rightness of their case and must present evidence of their husband's
wrongdoings. In cases where there has been physical abuse, judges may demand
testimony by witnesses but if the abuse occurred at home - as it almost always
does - there may well be no witness. The solution to these problems lies in
what we referred to above as a prenuptial agreement, signed and accepted by
both the man and the woman. Some women have gone so far as to refuse to marry a
man who would not agree to this.
Nura, a 27-year-old Saudi woman, agrees that this condition
should be in the hands of women. She said these additions to the marriage
contract would be an important way to encourage women to marry. "What I
suffered in my marriages has been terrible," she said. "I married first when I
was a university student. It was a traditional marriage, arranged by my family.
It did not last and I was soon divorced. Later I married another man, mainly to
escape society's censure and blame. Then I found that my second husband was an
alcoholic; initially, I tried to help him but it was impossible."
Nura then asked him for a divorce but he refused. She next
went to court but she was told that she had to prove her husband was an
alcoholic. The court hearings were delayed and postponed for months because her
husband refused to come to court. Nura has now been waiting for a year and she
has not yet received a divorce. She said, "No woman will go to court to ask for
divorce unless there is a problem. We need justice so we could live in peace."
An agreement prior to marriage that both partners accepted could have solved
this problem.
Ebtihaj agrees that these agreements in the hands of women
would solve many problems, especially since women have little chance in court.
She told her story.
"I married the man of my choice but after marriage, I
discovered many defects in my husband. Married life was virtually impossible. I
talked to my father and he told me to be patient. For one year I tried to get
along with my husband but he is a man who believes that he is always right and
will simply not listen to a woman. He even refused to pay household expenses
and when I complained to my father, he started beating me. I ran away to my
father's house and went with him to the court to get a divorce. The judge asked
me for proof of what I was saying; he wanted witnesses. How could I produce
witnesses when everything happened behind closed doors?"
Ibraheem Al-Fuhaid, a lawyer and legal consultant, said that
Islam puts the decision for divorce into the hands of the husband. A husband
can grant his wife the right to divorce before marriage. The question is
whether the wife can get the right after marriage. He said that if both agreed,
then the wife would have the right to divorce her husband whenever she wanted
to.
Muhammad Al-Nujaimi, a scholar, said that parents should make
sure that their daughter's husband is satisfactory by investigating him before
the marriage. The father has the right to ask for a dowry before marriage and
also, in the event of the man divorcing his daughter, the father may also ask
for the same amount again and the man must pay it. This has the effect of
making the man think twice about divorcing his wife or mistreating her. The
wife may also ask for a clause in the contract, which stipulates that she must
be well-treated and that she must be allowed to work or study if she likes. If
the husband violates these conditions, the woman has the right to divorce him.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
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Lebih Baik, in Commonality & Shared Destiny.
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