FYI
[CNN]
Rape is shredding Syria's social fabric
By Lauren Wolfe , Special to CNN
December 5, 2012 -- Updated 2302 GMT (0702 HKT)
CNN.com
Editor's note: Lauren Wolfe is an award-winning journalist and the director of
Women Under Siege, a Women's Media Center initiative on sexualized violence in
conflict. The group's site features a real-time interactive map on reports of
rape in Syria. Wolfe is the former senior editor of the Committee to Protect
Journalists, and blogs at laurenmwolfe.com. Follow her on Twitter, @Wolfe321.
(CNN) -- A woman approached me as I was rushing toward the D.C. Metro after
giving a talk on rape in Syria last month. She asked in a low voice if she
could share some information. She had DVDs, she said. On them were testimonies
of Syrian women who'd been raped; in particular, a mother, a daughter and a
sister all in one family.
In a taxi recently en route to Heathrow Airport, I was told another startling
story. The driver turned to me and said, "I am Syrian. And I have a story to
tell you that I keep wishing is not true."
His eyes welled up as he relayed what his neighbor said happened to a friend.
The neighbor described being stopped in his car at a Syrian checkpoint on the
road from Zabadani to Damascus. He said army officers told him to leave his
daughter with them. My driver said he knew no other details than this, that the
man had been given a horrific choice to make: leave his daughter behind, or his
wife and other children would be killed in front of his eyes.
The man made a decision, the driver said. He left his daughter at the
checkpoint and drove on.
I keep wishing it is not true, too, but what I told the driver that day is that
his story sounds all too familiar: Of the hundreds of cases of sexualized
violence against Syrian women and men I have heard and documented as the
director of the Women Under Siege project at the Women's Media Center, many fit
this pattern of women and girls being raped at checkpoints.
Read more: Syrian family hides from attacks in underground 'prison'
And the story from the woman in Washington falls all too neatly into the
pattern of ripping apart families -- rape and other forms of sexualized
violence have long been used as a tool of war to destroy not only individual
bodies but entire communities. What is happening in Syria is no exception.
In an attempt to not lose a single story that could be used as possible
evidence for future war crimes trials, we are documenting reports of sexualized
violence on a live, crowd-sourced map on Syria. We know, however, that evidence
of crimes is being destroyed every day: More than 20% of the women in our
reports are found dead or are killed after rape.
Broken down by type of crime and perpetrator, each case is marked as a red dot
on the map and contains up to dozens or even hundreds of victims. Each dot is a
life or lives potentially ripped apart by a horrific act of violence, an act
that is particularly powerful as a weapon in Syria, where honor is so highly
prized.
No defenses against chemical weapons
Mortar strikes school in refugee camp
Aleppo power out, rubble everywhere
Rape is tearing Syrians apart. The concept of purity is destroying their lives
on top of it.
The International Rescue Committee, referring to Syria, reported in August that
"girl-child survivors of rape are frequently married to their older cousins or
other male members of the community, to 'save their honor.' " Participants in
adolescent girl groups told the IRC that if a girl is raped, "Sometimes she
might be killed by her family. She might kill herself. ... She knows that she
will be dishonored for the rest of her life."
Honor killings, forced marriages and divorce are just a few of the ways shame
is destroying lives in Syria. There is also suicide when the shame becomes too
much to bear, such as the story on our map telling of a girl in Latakia who
reportedly killed herself by jumping off a balcony after rape.
But the concept of honor is failing Syrian women in another way.
Read more: NATO stands with Turkey as Syrian violence spills over borders
"What I always think about is how women have tried to persuade the perpetrators
not to attack them by asking to think of them as their sisters," said one of
the Syrian researchers on our mapping project.
"In Arab culture, a real man will protect his sister at any price. He is
expected to take revenge if someone dishonors her. His sister is his
responsibility even if she is married because blood relation is stronger than
marriage. The women were appealing to whatever remnant of manhood and Arab
honor these attackers might still have. Unfortunately, they had none."
The unending "dishonor" and manipulation of Syrians through sexualized violence
is committed by all sides, although the majority of our reports indicate
government perpetrators. It is creating an entire nation of traumatized people:
not just the survivors of the acts, but their children as well.
It is time to stop it all. There are measures the world can take to bring these
horrors to an end. Shame should never fall on victims, but should be used to
compel Russia to join a U.N. Security Council call for the Syrian government's
alleged crimes to be referred to the International Criminal Court.
Governments can help humanitarian groups that offer medical and psychosocial
services for survivors. Syrian women's rights organizations are already taking
action to combat and respond to gender-based violence, including organizing
family-based care for displaced children of survivors. The international
community can and should support Syrian civil society in this work.
Shame is a powerful feeling that causes retreat. It causes us to lower our
heads and look away. But we have a chance to lift up the survivors of
sexualized violence in Syria and honor them by paying attention, by caring
enough to bring their suffering to an end, by telling them that we do not
accept the violence against them.
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The opinions expressed in this commentary are solely those of Lauren Wolfe.
© 2013 Cable News Network. Turner Broadcasting System, Inc. All Rights Reserved.
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