[QUAD-L] : ~PT.1~DONKEY TRACKS" ~~ from: The White Donkey Society

[Jwmjimmy]

~PT.I ~DONKEY TRACKS" ~~ from: The White Donkey Society        December 23, 2004          ~TRAILS of INSPIRATION~ O Holy Night http://www.dobhran.com/greetings/GRxmas7-ea.htm   "Sleigh Ride" http://www.riversongs.net/flas1/sleigh.html                  ~TRAILS of WISDOM~  "Resentment is like taking poison and hoping the other person dies-- St. Augustine   Dress a goat in silk and it's still a goat. -- Celtic Proverb   "Criticism never built a house, wrote a play, composed a song, painted a picture, or improved a marriage."     -- Unknown   There are two ways of spreading light â  to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it. - Edith Wharton   There is a giant asleep within every man.  When the giant awakes, miracles happen.  ­­­­ ­-­ ­­- Frederick Faust   "The Lord gave us two ends to use; one to think with, the other to sit on. Which one we use will determine how well we do in life.  In other words, heads you win, tails you lose." â author unknown   Many people take no care of their money  till they come nearly to the end of it,  and others do just the same with their time." - Goethe*                                ~TRAILS of KNOWLEDGE~                  'Cure' found for snoring Doctors in Norway say they have invented a cure for snoring.The cure involves stiffening the palate to stop the vibrations that cause snoring..The process involves inserting three tiny threads made from Dacron - a tough polymer used in the clothing industry - into the soft palate. The whole procedure last two minutes and is performed under local anaesthetic.Doctors at St Olav's Hospital in Trondheim pioneered the procedure in conjuction with an American company.Norway put snoring on the political agenda earlier this year after offshore oil workers complained of roommates keeping them awake at night   Already approved in the United States, the new method is expected to receive the green light from European authorities in the coming months, *  Obstructive sleep apnea (OSA) and snoring are caused by an obstruction of the airway, when tissues in the mouth or throat vibrate. A major contributor to OSA and snoring is the soft palate tissue. Studies suggest that more than 70 per cent of all sleep apnea and snoring involve the soft palate -- ANANOVA  ~TRAILS of HE-HAWS~ #1 A Jewish lady named Mrs. Rosenberg who many years ago was stranded late one night at a fashionable resort - one that did not admit Jews.                                                                                    The desk clerk looked down at his book and said, "Sorry, no room.  The hotel is full." The Jewish lady said, "But your sign says that you have vacancies."                                                                                                                   The desk clerk stammered and then said curtly, "You know that we do not admit Jews.  Now if you will try the other side of town..."                                                                                                                                                                                     Mrs. Rosenberg stiffened noticeable and said, "I'll have you know I converted to your religion." The desk clerk said, "Oh, yeah, let me give you a little test.  How was Jesus born?"                                                                                    Mrs. Rosenberg replied, "He was born to a virgin named Mary in a little town called Bethlehem."   "Very good," replied the hotel clerk.  "Tell me more."  Mrs. Rosenberg replied, "He was born in a manger."                             "That's right," said the hotel clerk.  "And why was he born in a manger?"                                                                                           Mrs. Rosenberg said loudly, "Because a jerk like you in the hotel wouldn't give a Jewish lady a room for the night!"  #2 After a nice dinner the two couples got up from the table. The ladies went into the kitchen and the men went into the family room. One of the gents said to the other, "I think it is so wonderful how you call your wife, "honey pie" and "sweet pea", and "sugar" all the time. The other gent said, "Well to tell you the truth, four years ago, I forget her name." #3 Two lawyers are in a bank, when, suddenly, armed robbers burst in. While several of the robbers take the money from the tellers, others line the customers, including the lawyers, up against a wall, and proceed to take their wallets, watches, etc. While this is going on lawyer number one jams something in lawyer number two's hand. Without looking down, lawyer number two whispers, "What is this?" to which lawyer number one replies, "It's that $50 I owe you."  #4 A couple went Christmas shopping at the mall.  They decided to go their separate ways and meet two hours later. The husband was at their appointed meeting place at the appointed time, but there was no sign of his wife.  After waiting for half an hour, he started looking for her but couldn't find her in any of the stores she usually frequented. Finally, thoroughly tired of looking for her, he approached a beautiful blonde on a mall bench.  He smiled at her and said, "Please, talk to me!  Quick!"                                                                                         She said, "Why?""Because I've been looking for my wife all over this mall and I can't find her," the man replied. "How will talking to me help you find your wife?  I have absolutely no idea what she looks like, much less where she is.""I didn't think you did.  However, every time I start talking to a beautiful woman, my wife appears!"