Dear Brethren, My oldest son goes to Eastern Christian Liberal Arts College. He is studying youth ministries. He also invoved in a Christian drama group. Which uses drama to reach people for Christ. Tim is using my testamony for a 10 min. one act play. I gave him my testamony and the following is what he came up with My story begins in 1969. I was in my early 20s at the time as a cook in the Navy. After that I worked in a factory. Hurt and confused, I starving for the kind of love and affection I never received while growing up. I searched for true love in each relationship I had. Afraid to make myself vulnerable, I pushed many women away who got too close to the pain I carried. Most of the time I either used them or they used me. Lonely and hurting I cried myself to sleep many nights. Drowning myself in alcohol at weekend parties I forgot the pain for time. However, no amount of alcohol could heal the pain and no person could bring life to soul that continued to die within me... For five years I continued to hold onto the pain that had become so familiar to me. Then one day someone invited my girlfriend to church. I was uncertain, even skeptical, but since there was a movie being shown that afternoon so I decided to come even though I had never heard of the movie. I sat and watched the movie, A Thief in the Night, and I felt as though my heart was being torn in two. The movie was about being left behind when Christ returns to take his church home. Those who were left behind would go through great tribulation and torment like none had ever experienced before. After the movie was over I went up front and received the love and forgiveness that could only be found in Jesus. On May 19, 1974, my life changed as I sensed the true love I had been looking for all my life. My girlfriend was already saved, and five days later we were married. After that I wanted more of God... The summer of 1974 is a time I will never forget. Sometimes I wish for one more chance to go back and change what had happened in my life. That summer God allowed me to see a vision of Himself calling to me. In this vision I stood upon a dry creek bed while in the distance I saw Jesus beckoning to me. He said, "Come, follow me." Upon this dry creek bed I saw the bloody foot prints of my Savior and Lord. My life was laid out before me but I could only see the pain and suffering that would come. Afraid of that pain I yelled, "I have had enough pain before I came to You! You can keep Your pain!" Drawing a line between myself and God I told Him how far I was willing to go and that I would not go any farther. Deciding to do the Christian walk my way, I turned my back upon the call God had place on my life... For 22 years I did it my way. I preached on the streets of downtown Syracuse. I shared the Word of God in the prisons, the hospitals, and at work. I lead people to Christ and discipled them. I was an usher at church, a board member, a Sunday School teach, a Royal Ranger Commander, and even a deacon. As a husband and a father of 3 children, I had a successful ministry inside of church and in the secular environments. Yet all this was meaningless because that line I had drawn between myself and Christ hindered me. I had hidden God's Word in my head but it was not in my heart. God could only take me so far because I had refused to suffer for Christ and face adversity... During the last four months of 1993 and on through 1994 I was working in an engineering lab. I was comfortable working in this environment and I was earning more than enough money to support my family. However, the chemicals we were using in the lab were extremely harmful. The safety inspector was not doing his job and some of these chemicals were spilled. At the time I thought that as a Christian, God had would place a protective bubble over me so that I would not be harmed-- Boy was I wrong... A few months later I became very ill. The diagnosis: Multiple Chemical Sensitivity. On January 5, 1995, I was placed on disability, thus beginning a very long court battle against the worker's compensation system. During the first two years of my illness I went through withdrawal from the chemicals that had poisoned my body. I was sick all the time, suicidal, depressed, angry, and hurt. I felt as though I had lost my identity because I thought it was in my work and in my ministry. Confused by all that had happened, I cried out to God, "Where are you? You said you would never leave me nor forsake me!" Receiving no answer I stopped going to church and I isolated myself from everything and every person... In 1996 I was at the end of my rope as a result of my illness and worker's compensation. Everything was out of my control and I was left with no where to turn. The church didn't know how to minister to me and my wife... She was hurting and confused, she didn't understand why all this had happened. Yet I knew... For 22 years God had been trying to slow me down enough so that I would listen to Him and He finally succeeded. For 22 years God had been quietly saying, "Will you trust me? Will you take up the Cross and follow me?" With no one else to turn to I finally removed that line I had placed between myself and the suffering and pain of my Lord and Savior. Submitting to His will, I realized again my identity as a child of God. I started to understand His unconditional love for me. To this day I struggle with the chemical illness but I choose to follow Christ no matter what, even if he chooses not to heal me. I'll never trade these last 4 years of my life for I have learned to trust in God. ===== "...and be found in Him, not having my own righteousness, which is from the law, but that which is by faith in Christ, the righteousness which is from God by faith; that I may know Him and the power of His resurrection, and the fellowship of His sufferings, being conformed to His death, if, by any means, I may attain to the ressurrection from the dead" (Philippians 3:9-11). __________________________________________________ Do You Yahoo!? Talk to your friends online with Yahoo! Messenger. http://im.yahoo.com --------- End forwarded message ---------- _______ To unsubscribe, send "unsubscribe rangernet" to [EMAIL PROTECTED] "Eat the hay & spit out the sticks! - A#1's mule" RTKB&G4JC! http://rangernet.org Autoresponder: [EMAIL PROTECTED]
