For you Duane >HOW TO WRITE GOODER > >Here are several very important but often forgotten rules of English: > >1. Avoid alliteration. Always. >2. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with. >3. Avoid clichés like the plague. (They're old hat.) >4. Employ the vernacular. >5. Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc. >6. Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are unnecessary. >7. It is wrong to ever split an infinitive. >8. Contractions aren't necessary. >9. Foreign words and phrases are not apropos. >10. One should never generalize. >11. Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson once said: "I hate quotations. Tell me what you know." >12. Comparisons are as bad as clichés. >13. Don't be redundant; don't use more words than necessary; it's highly superfluous. >14. Be more or less specific. >15. Understatement is always best. >16. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement. >17. One-word sentences? Eliminate. >19. Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake. >19. The passive voice is to be avoided. >20. Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms. >21. Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed. >22. Who needs rhetorical questions? > >[forwarded by JR] > >!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! > >Mikey's Thot for the Day: >Just because I have a short attention span doesn't mean I > >!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! >PERMISSION: Yeah, you can send this Funny to anybody you want. And, if >you're REAL nice, you'll tell them you got it from >www.MikeysFunnies.com! >!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! > >MIKEY'S FUNNIES, brought to you by Mike Atkinson @ YOUTH SPECIALTIES >A Funny just 4 U, every weekday. > >~ To subscribe or unsubscribe, go to the >Funnies Subscription Center: http://www.MikeysFunnies.com > >~ Also, to unsubscribe, e-mail the address shown above in the >List-Unsubscribe header >or e-mail: [EMAIL PROTECTED] > >~ For additional commands, e-mail: >[EMAIL PROTECTED] > >~ Questions? Problems? [EMAIL PROTECTED] > >~ Youth Ministry on the Net: http://www.YouthSpecialties.com >Real Help for Real Ministry > >!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! > >Copyright 2001 Youth Specialties > _______ To unsubscribe, send "unsubscribe rangernet" to [EMAIL PROTECTED] or visit http://rangernet.org/subscribe.htm http://rangernet.org Autoresponder: [EMAIL PROTECTED]
