On the Lighter Side...
 
WHAT A FRIEND
 
A pastor was having an awful time with his congregation and eventually
decided to pack it in. At the close of the next Sunday morning service he
announced, "Some years ago Jesus brought me to this congregation. Jesus is
now taking me away from it." With those remarks he sat down somewhat
abruptly and it was left to the organist to announce the closing hymn. "How
appropriate," he commented, "that we sing hymn number 104 - 'What a friend
we have in Jesus.'"
 
SMELL THE ROSES
 
A young man, while bringing flowers to a cemetery, noticed an old Chinese
man placing a bowl of rice on a nearby grave. The young man walked up to
the Chinese man and asked, "When do you expect your friend to come up and
eat the rice?" The old Chinese man replied with a smile, "Same time your
friend comes up to smell the flowers."
 
LOVE
 
Two friends are discussing the topic of love. "I thought I was in love
three times," one friend says. "How so?" his friend asks. "Five years ago I
deeply cared for a woman who wanted nothing to do with me." "Was that not
love?" his friend asks. "No," he replies. "That was obsession. And then two
years ago I deeply cared for an attractive woman who didn't understand me."
"Was that love?" "No," he replies. "That was frustration. And just last
year I met a woman aboard a cruise ship to the Caribbean. She was smart,
funny, and a great conversationalist. And everywhere we met on that boat, I
would get this strange sensation in the pit of my stomach." "Was that
love?" his friend asks. "No," he replies. "That was seasickness."
 
SIGNS FOUND IN KITCHENS
 
A messy kitchen is a happy kitchen and this kitchen is delirious.
If we are what we eat, then I'm easy, fast, and cheap.
A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.
Thou shalt not weigh more than thy refrigerator.
A clean kitchen is a sign of a misspent life.
Help keep the kitchen clean - eat out.
Countless number of people have eaten in this kitchen and gone on to lead
normal lives.
My next house will have no kitchen --- just vending machines.
LR FROM NOTTINGHAM ENGLAND

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