I love these, Steve, and how true! I can recall my younger son, Brian, taking the cordless phone outside to use it, and I would beg him to bring it back into the house and leave it on the livingroom table; guess that was too much trouble and energy for the tired poor little kid to exert, and twice, he actually left it out, in the middle of the yard; inexcusable; I told him after that, if he could not do better than that, and be more responsible, no more using the cordless phone; my, things changed quickly! no need for such carelessness with a teenager, too careless for a kid of any age knowing better. Sandy I mean, also, it could start raining, and I never would have known it was outside, and I'd be rummaging around the house, looking for it. ----- Original Message ----- From: steve doyle To: [email protected] Sent: Saturday, September 06, 2008 4:54 AM Subject: [RecipesAndMore] You Know You're a Mom When....
You Know You're a Mom When.... 1. Your feet stick to the kitchen floor.....and you don't care. 2. When the kids are fighting, you threaten to lock them in a room together and not let them out until someone's bleeding. 3. You can't find your cordless phone, so you ask a friend to call you, and you run around the house madly, following the sound until you locate the phone downstairs in the laundry basket. 4. You spend an entire week wearing sweats. 5. Your idea of a good day is making it through without a child leaking bodily fluids on you. 6. Popsicles become a food staple. 7. Your favorite television show is a cartoon. 8. Peanut butter and jelly is eaten at least in one meal a day. 9. You're willing to kiss your child's boo-boo, regardless of what body part it happens to be on. 10. Your baby's pacifier falls on the floor and you give it back to her after you suck the dirt off of it because you're too busy to wash it off. 11. Your kids make jokes about farting, burping, pooping, etc., and you think it's funny. 12. You're so desperate for adult conversation that you spill your guts to the telemarketer that calls and HE hangs up on YOU! 13. Spit is your number one cleaning agent. 14. You're up each night until 10 PM vacuuming, dusting, wiping, washing, drying, loading, unloading, shopping, cooking, driving, flushing, ironing, sweeping picking up, changing sheets, changing diapers, bathing, helping with homework, paying bills, budgeting, clipping coupons, folding clothes, putting to bed, dragging out of bed, brushing, chasing, buckling, feeding, them, Not yourself, PLUS swinging, playing baseball, bike riding, pushing trucks, cuddling dolls, rollerblading, basketball, football, catch, bubbles, sprinklers, slides, nature walks, coloring, crafts, jumping rope, PLUS raking, trimming, planting, edging, mowing, gardening, painting, and walking the dog. You get up at 5:30 AM and you have no time to eat, sleep, drink or go to the bathroom, and yet ... you still managed to gain 10 pounds. 15. In your bathroom there is toothpaste on the light fixtures, water all over the floor, a dog drinking out of the toilet and body hair forming a union to protest unsafe working conditions. 16. You buy cereal with marshmallows in it. 17. The closest you get to gourmet cooking is making Rice Krispie bars 18. You count the sprinkles on each kid's cupcake to make sure they're equal. 19. You want to take out a contract on the kid who broke your child's favorite toy and made him or her cry. 20. You have time to shave only one leg at a time. 21. You hide in the bathroom to be alone. 22. Your child throws up and you catch it. 23. Someone else's kid throws up at a party and you keep eating. 24. You consider finger paint to be a controlled substance 25. You mastered the art of placing food on a plate without anything touching. 26. Your child insists that you read "Once Upon a Potty" out loud in the lobby of the doctor's office, and you do it. 27. You hire a sitter because you haven't been out with your husband in ages, then spend half the night talking about and checking on the kids 28. You hope ketchup is a vegetable because it's the only one your child eats. 29. You can't bear the thought of your son's first girlfriend. 30. You hate the thought of his wife even more. 31. You find yourself cutting your husband's sandwiches into unusual shapes. 32. You fast-forward through the scene when the hunter shoots Bambi's mother. 33. You obsess when your child clings to you upon parting during his first month at school, then obsess when he skips in without looking back the second time. 34. You can't bear to give away baby clothes, it's so final. 35. You hear your mother's voice coming out of your mouth when you say, "Not in your good clothes." 36. You stop criticizing the way your mother raised you. 37. You read that the average five-year-old asks 437 questions a day and you feel proud that your kid is "above average." 38. You say at least once a day, "I'm not cut out for this job," but you know you wouldn't trade it for anything. A single candle can illuminate an entire room. A true friend lights up an entire lifetime. Thanks for the bright lights of your friendship. --~--~---------~--~----~------------~-------~--~----~ Access the Recipes And More list archives at: http://www.mail-archive.com/recipesandmore%40googlegroups.com/ Visit the group home page at: http://groups.google.com/group/RecipesAndMore -~----------~----~----~----~------~----~------~--~---
