It is better in parts but it is still an uncoordinated mish-mash in my opinion. --- Trudy =============================================== The Sydney Morning Herald Murray rewrites his preamble for the Constitution Date: 10/04/99 By TONY STEPHENS Les Murray has rewritten the constitutional preamble, in the light of the public reaction to the first version he produced with the Prime Minister, Mr Howard. The poet's new version retains the controversial reference to "mateship" but he has added warmth to his acknowledgment of indigenous inhabitation. Murray said yesterday that his new preamble was not an official redraft, nor meant to compromise the Prime Minister. Denying some media reports of a rift with Mr Howard, he said, however, that revisions had made their first collaborative document "rather baggy". He said: "This is an attempt to pull it together into a crisper statement of the nation and some of its core values." The poet attempted the rewrite at the suggestion of the Herald. The Prime Minister first approached Murray after the poet's draft preamble appeared in the Herald. Murray said yesterday: "I suppose I owe you that [the rewrite] since it was you who got me into this perilous genre of preamble-writing." The one fact that I learned from the debate was that, in a rare legal usage, 'time immemorial' can mean about 700 years. I have replaced that phrase accordingly. A lot of people complained that we had passed over native-born Australians and, in the end, it seemed unreal to me to separate them from immigrants. To do so would fly in the face of sex, of ancestry and intermarriage. "My early drafts carried a specific mention of Tasmania and I have restored it, but on mateship I have bowed to the Prime Minister's preference, and his sense of the broad community. Wide approval for the term has come from many quarters, not least from younger women, including some lesbians. Others will always disdain it, but the preamble itself doesn't promote uniformity. "If nothing else, my right honourable client and I may have helped to clarify the modern Australian usage of 'mate' and 'mateship'. "In the Aboriginal paragraph, both Labor's word 'custodianship' and my suggested 'stewardship' of land seem to be unsuitable, because both primarily refer to taking care of the property of others. I've had to rethink the formula there, and put more warmth into it." Murray's new preamble: With hope in God, the Commonwealth of Australia is constituted by the sovereign equality of all its citizens. Australia's people are woven together from many ancestries, both immigrant and native born. Their lives continue to be enriched from ancestral cultures and by traditions and achievements of their own. The great island continent of Australia with Tasmania has set its people crucial challenges, but it has also given sanctuary and the good life to many, and remains a distinctive inspiration for all. Since great antiquity, it has been inhabited by Aborigines and Torres Strait Islanders, whose spirit is nourished above all by their deep kinship with their lands. Australians are free to be proud of their country and heritage, free to realise themselves as individuals, free to be generous and exercise moral courage. The nation values excellence as well as fairness, and independence as dearly as mateship. Australia's democratic federal system of government exists under law to preserve each person in an equal dignity which may never be infringed by prejudice or fashion or ideology, nor invoked against merit. The first preamble: With hope in God, the Commonwealth of Australia is constituted by the equal sovereignty of all its citizens. The Australian nation is woven together of people from many ancestries and arrivals. Our vast island continent has helped to shape the destiny of our Commonwealth and the spirit of its people. Since time immemorial our land has been inhabited by Aborigines and Torres Strait Islanders, who are honoured for their ancient and continuing cultures. In every generation immigrants have brought great enrichment to our nation's life. Australians are free to be proud of their country and heritage, free to realise themselves as individuals, and free to pursue their hopes and ideals. We value excellence as well as fairness, independence as dearly as mateship. Australia's democratic and federal system of government exists under law to preserve and protect all Australians in an equal dignity which may never be infringed by prejudice or fashion or ideology nor invoked against achievement. In this spirit we, the Australian people, commit ourselves to this Constitution. 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