~Came across this one whilst surfing the web :-
Footballing definitions :-
Football: A game consisting of 22 skilled players, one impartial referee,
two eagle eyed referee's assistants and one stupid ball.
Teammate: Another person that you have to dribble around
Fans: Two sets of abusive referees
Offside: The Bermuda Triangle area of the pitch where "innocent" players are
drawn towards.
Scoring: When 11 men spontaneously start dancing and kissing, regardless of
any injuries, whilst 11 others droop like wallflowers
Striker: Faultless, overpaid, box hogging layabout who only misses the goal
when he is fed a bad ball
Defender: Player who's function is to commit fouls just outside of the
penalty area
Ball: Round object used by referees to entice players into comitting fouls
Ed-case : Usually Harmless but Blunt and Forthright player...... always
willing to defend ..... very annoying to seasoned attackers
...... any other suggestions
John Austin (Madrid)
PS .... OK so I made the last one up :-)
UNITED!
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