My neighbor found out her dog could hardly hear so she took it to the
veterinarian. He found the problem was hair in it's ears and cleaned both
ears and the dog could hear fine. The vet told the lady if she wanted
to keep this from reoccurring she should go to the store and get some
"Nair" hair remover and rub in it's ears once a month. The lady
goes to the drug store and gets some "Nair" hair remover. At
the register the druggist tells her "If you're going to use this
under your arms don't use deodorant for a few days." The lady says
"I'm not using it under my arms." The druggist says "If
you're using it on your legs don't shave for a couple of days." The
lady says "I'm not using it on my legs either, and if you must know
I'm using it on my schnauzer." The druggist says "Stay off your
bicycle for a week."
An elderly couple had been dating for some time and decided it was finally
time to marry. Before the wedding, they had a long conversation regarding
how their marriage might work. They discussed finances, living arrangements
and so on. Finally the old man decided it was time to broach the subject
of their physical relationship. "How do you feel about sex?"
he asked, rather hopefully. "Well, I'd have to say I like it infrequently,"
she responded. The old guy paused... then he asked, "Was that one
word or two?"