Missed last week, so you must suffer thru "two stupid groaners" this week. Y'all can forgive me this one time because it's the ... *HOLIDAYS*...
........................... Groaner for Friday, 19 Dec 03... Nick the Dragon Slayer had a long-standing obsession to nuzzle the beautiful Queen's voluptuous breasts, but he knew the penalty for this would be death. One day he revealed his secret desire to his colleague, Horatio the Physician, who was the King's chief doctor. Horatio the Physician exclaimed that he could arrange for Nick the Dragon Slayer to satisfy his desire, but it would cost him 1,000 gold coins to arrange it. Without pause, Nick the Dragon Slayer readily agreed to the scheme. The next day, Horatio the Physician made a batch of itching powder and poured a little bit into the Queen's brassiere while she bathed. Soon after she dressed, the itching commenced and grew intense. Upon being summoned to the Royal Chambers to address this incident, Horatio the Physician informed the King and Queen that only a special saliva, if applied for four hours, would cure this type of itch, and that tests had shown that only the saliva of Nick the Dragon Slayer would work as the antidote to cure the itch. The King quickly summoned Nick the Dragon Slayer. Horatio the Physician then slipped Nick the Dragon Slayer the antidote for the itching powder, which he quickly put into his mouth, and for the next four hours, Nick worked passionately on the Queen's voluptuous and magnificent breasts. The Queen's itching was eventually relieved, and Nick the Dragon Slayer left satisfied and touted as a hero. Upon returning to his chamber, Nick the Dragon Slayer found Horatio the Physician demanding his payment of 1,000 gold coins. With his obsession now satisfied, Nick the Dragon Slayer couldn't have cared less and, knowing that Horatio the Physician could never report this matter to the King, shooed him away with no payment made. The next day, Horatio the Physician slipped a massive dose of the same itching powder into the King's loincloth. The King imediately summoned Nick the Dragon Slayer... ... MORAL OF THE STORY: Pay your bills! .............................. Groaner for Friday, 12 Dec 03... > >Hippie Love > >A hippie gets onto a bus and sits next to a nun in the front seat. The > >hippie looks over and asks the nun if she would make love to him. The nun > >surprised by the question politely declines and gets off the at the next > >stop. > >When the bus starts on it's way the driver says to the hippie, "I can tell > >you how you can get that nun to make love to you." The hippie says that > >he'd > >love to know, so the bus driver tells him that every Tuesday evening at > >midnight the nun goes to the cemetery and prays to God. "If you went > >dressed > >in a robe and a glow in the dark paint mask she would think you are God and > >you could command her to make love to you." > >The hippie decides this is a great idea, so that Tuesday he goes to the > >cemetery and waits for the nun to show up. At midnight sure enough the nun > >shows up and begins praying the hippie jumped out from hiding and says. "I > >AM GOD! I have heard your prayers and I will answer them, BUT ... first you > >must make love to me." The nun agrees but asks for anal sex so she > >might > >keep her virginity because she is married to the church. The hippie agrees > >to this and has his way with the nun. > >After the hippie finishes he stands up and rips off the mask and shouts, > >Ha! Ha! Ha! I'm the hippie!" > >Then the nun jumps up and shouts, "Ha! Ha! Ha! I'm the bus driver!" .......................... "Holiday Cheers" to all of you fine *BamaFans* -vo- ______________________________________________________ RollTideFan - The University of Alabama Athletics Discussion List "Welcome to RollTideFan! Wear a cup!" To join or leave the list or to make changes to your subscription visit http://listinfo.rolltidefan.net
