I have now had the opportunity to read draft 7 of rfc5798bis in detail and have
the
following comments (apologies that the list is rather long). The vast majority
of the
comments relate to the original RFC5798, but it seems a good opportunity to
make these
updates while the RFC is being updated.
1. All occurrences of "virtual router" should be "Virtual Router", including
plurals and
possessives (it is a defined term).
2. All occurrences of "VRRP router" should be "VRRP Router", including plurals
and
possessives (defined term).
3. All occurrences of "VRRP Active Router" in Abstract, section 1
(Introduction) and section
9 should be "Active Router" (defined term).
4. All occurrences of "VRRP Backup Router" in Abstract and section 1
(Introduction) should
be "Active Router" (defined term).
5. Abstract, final paragraph, insert "to" after "updated".
6. Section 1 (Introduction) second paragraph, insert "to" after "updated".
7. Section 1.1 paragraph 3 should have "for IPv4" inserted at the end.
8. Section 1.1 paragraph 8 should have "to" inserted after "augmented".
"ethernet" should be
"Ethernet".
9. Section 1.3 second paragraph delete "be" between "may" and "not". Also delete
"associated" before "protocol" ("associated" is specified 3 words earlier), and
delete the
comma between "and" and "such".
10. Section 1.4 The second sentence does not read easily. Suggest replacing
"The Router
Advertisements ... than 10 seconds" with "The Router Advertisements are
multicast
periodically at a rate such that the hosts will normally take more than 10
seconds to learn
the default routers on a LAN".
11. Section 1.4 second paragraph delete "(ND)"; this is specified in the
previous
paragraph.
12. Section 1.4 last paragraph. Replace "for a failed default router" to "from
a failed
Active Router". Change "around 3 seconds" to "3 to 4 seconds". I suggest adding
at the end
of that sentence "or within 1/64th second when using the lowest
Advertisement_Interval".
13. Section 1.6 change "guarantees" to "guarantee".
14. Section 1.7 definition of "Active Router".Change "become the" to "be".
15. Section 2.2 replace "preferential router" with "Virtual Router".
16. Section 2.4 delete ", i.e., sending either IPv4 or IPv6". IPvX is defined
in section
1.2.
17. Section 2.5 second paragraph. Move "may occur" to after "problematic
scenario". Change
both occurrences of "VRRP_Advertisement_Interval" to "Advertisement_Interval"
and add "(see
section 6.1)" after first occurrence. Change "transmitted onto" to "transmitted
on" (this is
consistent with change in previous sentence). Insert "(see section 6.1)" after
"Active_Down_Interval" since it is defined later in the document. Insert
"original" before
"Active Router cause a".
18. Section 3 second paragraph. Change "virtual router identifier" to "Virtual
Router
Identifier (see section 6.1)".
19. Section 3 fourth paragraph. Change "VRRP Advertisement messages" to "VRRP
advertisement
messages" (it is not a defined term). Change "unless it has" to "unless the
Backup Router
has" ("it" refers to Active Router as the last noun).
20. Section 3 last paragraph. Insert "Router" after "Backup". "(< 1 second )"
should be "(<
4 seconds when using the default 1 second Advertisement_Interval (see section
6.1))" (if the
Active Router fails, takeover time is 3 * Advertisement_Interval + Skew_Time).
21. Section 4.1 first and second paragraphs after diagram, delete comma after
"i.e.".
22. Section 4.1. Move the final paragraph "Note that ..." to before the
diagram, and delete
the words "in both cases".
23. Section 4.1 paragraph starting "In the IPv6 case" change "LAN interface for
the VRRP
protocol and" to "LAN interface, and for the VRRP protocoal there is". Change
"other
routers" to "Virtual Routers".
24. Section 4.1 in two paragraphs starting "In an IPv? VRRP environment" where
? is 4 or 6,
change "virtual router ID" to "VRID", and change "owned by a router " to "owned
by Router-
1".
25. Section 4.1 in paragraph starting "In an IPv6 VRRP environment", delete
the first
sentence (it duplicates the second sentence). In the (current) second sentence
delte "Link-
Local" (the second and subsequent IPv6 address don't need to be link-local).
Change "with
both VRIDs" to "with the VRID" (there is only one VRID in this example).
26. Section 4.1 paragraphs starting "The IPv? example above", if "IPv4" and
"IP" in the
first paragraph are replaced with IPvX, the second of the paragraphs can be
deleted, . If
the paragraphs are not combined, the last sentence of the IPv4 example needs to
be added to
the IPv6 paragraph.
27. Section 5 first paragraph replace "VRRP packet" with "VRRP advertisement".
Replace "and
the state" with ", the Max Advertise Interval and backed up addresses".
28. Section 5.2.3 After "field" add "(in conjunction with the protocol family)".
29. Section 5.2.4 third paragraph add sentence at end "Note, each Virtual
Router for a VRID
should be configured with different priorities (unless there are more than 254
non address-
owner virtual routers) since if two (or more) Backup Routers are configured
with the same
priority, when the Active Router fails, both Backup Routers will transition to
be an Active
Router simultaneously, both sending VRRP advertisements and gratuitous
ARP/unsolicited ND
messages, causing confusion for learning bridges (see section 3)".
30. Section 5.2.4 last paragraph "Active Router to timeout" to
"Active_Down_Interval (see
section 6.1) to expire".
31. Section 5.2.7 to end. I do not think that "ADVERTISEMENT" should be
capitalised.
32. Section 5.2.7 second paragraph. Change "VRRP routers" to "Backup Routers".
33. Section 5.2.8 third paragraph, would the reference to Section 5.2 be better
as a
reference to Section 5.2.9?
34. Section 5.2.9 last paragraph replace "VRRP protocol packet" with "IP header
family" (the
VRRP PDU does not identify whether the packet is IPv4 or IPv6).
35. Section 6.1 Advertisement_Interval. Add "sent by this Virtual Router" after
(centiseconds)".
36. Section 6.1 Add definition "IPvX_Addresses" as "IPv4_Addresses or
IPv6_Addresses" after
definition of "IPv6_Addresses".
37. Section 6.1 Skew_Time. Replace "priority" with "Priority".
38. Section 6.1 Preempt_Mode Note - replace "The" with "the".
39. Section 6.1 Virtual_Router_MAC_Address change "ARP" to "ARP/ND" and change
"IPvX
Addresses to "IPvX_Addresses".
40. Section 6.2 add "(Backup Routers only)" at end of definition of
"Active_Down_Timer".
41. Section 6.2 add "(Active Routers only)" at end of definition of
"Adver_Timer".
42. Section 6.4 second paragraph delete "election".
43. Section 6.4.1 (105) change "address" to "address(es)".
44. Section 6.4.1 (120) change "request" to "message" (gratuitous ARP messages
are not
requests).
45. Section 6.4.1 (150) change "does not own the virtual address" to "is not
the address
owner".
46. Section 6.4.1 (380) change "request" to "message".
47. Section 6.4.1 (450) insert "Max" before "Advertise".
48. Section 6.4.1 after (450) add "(452) @ Recompute Skew_Time" (it needs to be
recomputed
after every change of Active_Adver_Interval, such as at (750)).
49. (460) Change "Reset" to "Set" (to match (760)).
50. (465) Add "than the local priority" at the end.
50. (640) Delete "+".
51. Section 6.4.1 (745) insert "Max" before "Advertise".
52. Section 6.4.1 after (775) add "(778) @ Send an advertisement" (the reason
for this is to
update/correct any learning bridges caches and to make the lower priority
Active Router
revert to Backup state. This is a change in procedure but not a protocol
change).
53. Section 7.1 after "- MUST verify that the VRRP version is 3" add a new
check "- MUST
verify that the VRRP packet Type is 1 - ADVERTISEMENT".
54. Section 7.1 paragraph beginning "A receiver SHOULD" change '"Maximum
Advertisement
Interval"' to 'Max Advertisement Interval' (i.e. delete "imum" and both double
quotes).
55. Section 7.2 Insert "- Set the source MAC address to virtual router MAC
Address" before
"- If the protected address is an IPv4 address, then:" and delete both
occurrences of
"+ Set the source MAC address to virtual router MAC Address" since it applies
to both IPv4
and IPv6 and avoids duplication. Also add "the" before "Virtual Router".
56. Section 7.2 In the two lines starting "+ Set the source IPv? address" add
"the" before
"interface".
57. Section 7.3 third and fifth paragraphs delete "VRRP" before "Virtual Router
Identifier".
Replace "network" with "LAN".
58. Section 8.1.2 replace "gratuitous ARP request" with "gratuitous ARP
message" (both
singular and plural in following paragraph).
59. Section 8.2.2 In "for the Virtual Router IPv6 address" replace "the" with
"a".
60. Section 8.4.2.1.2 and "be" before configured at the end.
I will send separate emails relating to section 5.2.8 (checksums) and 8.3.2
(recommendations
for priority when multiple Backup Routers), since they are more than simple
editorial
changes and probably require more discussion.
With regards,
Quentin Armitage
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