its ok, i resolve it
this is what i did:
int the view:
<td><%= link_to 'Destroy', :controller => :users, :action
=> :destroy,  :id => user %></td>

in the routes.rb:
resources :users, :only => [:destroy] do
    collection do

      get 'users' => :destroy
    end
  end
resources :users

all works good :)

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