Or they mass-produce themselves. On Fri, Sep 3, 2010 at 6:20 PM, Mr. Worf <[email protected]> wrote:
> > > I won't get worried until they start mass producing him. > > On Fri, Sep 3, 2010 at 11:41 AM, Martin Baxter <[email protected]>wrote: > >> >> >> Folks, post that pic of Topio as wallpaper. It's good to know the face of >> your executioner, that you might have a headstart... >> >> >> On Fri, Sep 3, 2010 at 8:25 AM, Mr. Worf <[email protected]> wrote: >> >>> >>> >>> Four Frightening (and Real) >>> Robots<http://www.weirdworm.com/four-frightening-and-real-robots/> >>> Editor: rale <http://www.weirdworm.com/author/rale/> / April 15, 2010 / >>> Category : Misc >>> <http://www.weirdworm.com/category/misc/>Science<http://www.weirdworm.com/category/science/> >>> >>> 78Share<http://www.facebook.com/sharer.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.weirdworm.com%2Ffour-frightening-and-real-robots%2F&t=Four%20Frightening%20%28and%20Real%29%20Robots%20-%20Weird%20Worm&src=sp> >>> >>> Back in the olden days, >>> people<http://www.weirdworm.com/10-weird-things-that-people-find-attractive/> >>> would >>> sit around their living rooms, light up fancy cigars and talk about the >>> future <http://www.weirdworm.com/10-bizarre-animal-mating-rituals/>. >>> They’d also try to guess what color looked like, given that everything was >>> black and white, but I’m getting sidetracked now. Back to the future, >>> people.If you were to somehow travel back in time to tell these olde-timeys >>> that the future would forgo flying cars in favor of men made of >>> metal<http://www.weirdworm.com/5-weird-video-games/>, >>> they would probably guffaw, call you a chowder head and adjust their >>> suspenders before heading out to the talking picture show with their best >>> dame Beatrice. But the future is now, and now is robots. Most of the robots >>> we build serve an explicit purpose, like building cars and reemploying the >>> people who used to build cars <http://www.weirdworm.com/10-crappy-cars/>. >>> Others, however, manage to operate on a second level. That level, dear >>> reader, is one of terror. >>> 1. >>> TOPIO >>> >>> Some robots are designed to kill human beings. Others are designed to >>> kill other robots. But when there’s nothing left to kill, what do we do with >>> our robots? We make them play sports. TOPIO began development in 2005 as a >>> humanoid robot designed to play table tennis. Built by a Vietnamese robot >>> firm, TOPIO confirms at least two things for us: mankind has run out of >>> useful things to do as a whole and Vietnam has robot firms, apparently. >>> >>> TOPIO’s main features are the ability to recognize fast moving objects, >>> to react to fast moving objects and to maintain balance. In other words, >>> TOPIO does what any human would do if they took up the lost art of table >>> tennis. Unlike your typical table tennis enthusiast, however, TOPIO looks >>> like this: >>> >>> [image: topio] >>> >>> Is this part of the T-1000′s vacation slides? If the goal of TOPIO was to >>> build a robot that would mindlessly play a tier-three sport and not cause >>> those who see it to cry out in fear, then mission failed. The shades say >>> “I’m going to kill you, fleshbag,” while the jacked physique says “No, >>> really, I’m going to kill you. And no one’s going to stop me because the >>> laws of men don’t apply to a machine. If you’d read Issac Asimov in high >>> school you would have known that already.” >>> >>> 2. >>> Roxxxy >>> >>> If the past is any indication, humankind as a whole will someday get >>> bored with robots. We tend to latch onto new technology pretty quickly, find >>> ways to make it more useful, then try to expand on it to make it more >>> efficient. Rather than let the linear passage of time take its course, >>> someone peered into the mists of the future, saw people having sex with >>> robots and made it a terrifying yet slightly arousing reality. >>> >>> [image: roxxxy] >>> >>> Roxxxy True Companion sells itself as “the world’s first and highest >>> quality sex robot doll.” To break that down a bit more, Roxxxy is a machine >>> that you’re supposed to stick your penis in, but its okay because it looks >>> sort of like an actual lady and not your mother’s vacuum cleaner hose. The >>> folks at True Companion spent two and a half years making Roxxy as realistic >>> as possible, from the feel of her skin to her ability to have orgasms. At >>> least, the website claims she can simulate real orgasms. I can happily live >>> out the rest of my days without confirming whether or not that’s true. >>> >>> Because spending precious years of your life developing a sexbot that >>> looks like a crime scene victim might come off as a little weird, the >>> development team also gave Roxxxy the ability to carry conversations, change >>> personality and to fill the emotional void in your life as well as the >>> physical one. But Roxxxy costs upwards of seven thousand dollars. Would you >>> buy a sex robot for seven thousand dollars just to talk to it? Of course >>> not. That’s like drinking a Tanqueray without first putting a diamond in it. >>> Roxxxy was made specifically for the refined sexual deviant who wants to >>> have sex with a highly sophisticated piece of machinery but doesn’t want to >>> admit that to any of his friends. >>> >>> The CB2 >>> >>> Japan is at the forefront of robot technology. Over the years the country >>> has been able to construct robots that can play trumpet, carry the elderly >>> down a flight of stairs, tumble down a flight of stairs or even ride a bike >>> before doing absolutely nothing else of merit. Once you’ve nailed all the >>> basics, it’s only natural that you’d get a little weird and well, when in >>> Rome, build automaton babies. >>> >>> [image: the cb2] >>> >>> The CB2 was built to mimic child learning with the hopes to better >>> understand child development. Supposedly, the CB2 was modeled after a >>> one-year old baby but that has to be a lie. If there’s a one-year old human >>> being that big and that horribly pale somewhere on this planet, then someone >>> needs to form a crack team of ex- U.S. Special Forces turned mercenaries to >>> send it back to God before it can learn to properly walk and bring society >>> to its knees. >>> >>> CB2 is capable of performing basic functions mimicking that of a toddler. >>> Its skin, however, is a white putty. That’s pretty much all the evidence >>> anyone needs to prove that this thing was actually built by David Lynch, >>> because a three foot tall baby made of white putty that simply rolls around >>> all day screaming is the sort of stuff that turns happy, God-fearing people >>> to suicide. You simply can’t unsee it. >>> >>> At some point, CB2 won’t be nearly as creepy, but that’s only because >>> Japan will out-do itself in the world of abstract nightmare robotics. In >>> fact, they already did. >>> >>> 4. >>> Robokiyu >>> >>> Japan is prone to earthquakes. Cleaning up the rubble and repairing the >>> damage done after such an event can be taxing on both funding and man hours. >>> So, why not just build a bunch of robots to do it for you? Oh yeah, because >>> it’s absolutely terrifying, that’s why. >>> >>> But alas, we are too late. Robokiyu was introduced to the world sometime >>> in 2008. It’s often referred to as a rescue bot as its primary functions are >>> to locate those injured after an earthquake and to clear rubble. At first >>> glance it doesn’t look all that terrifying: >>> >>> [image: robokiyu] >>> >>> No killer sunglasses and no soulless baby face. Instead, Robokiyu grabs >>> the bodies of those presumed dead and stuffs them inside of itself. Try to >>> imagine that scenario: an earthquake literally rocks your world. Your home >>> is destroyed and you’re left to die trapped beneath the rubble. Just as you >>> think your about to shuffle off this mortal coil you see sunlight as the >>> cold, mechanical hands begin to unearth you from the rubble. Oh, you think, >>> its just Robokiyu. Thank goodness! Once you’re finally free you wonder how >>> to go about thanking a robot. Then Robokiyu’s tiny robot pincers grab you by >>> the collar as it shouts “CORPSE. CORPSE. MUST CONSUME THE DEAD.” You try to >>> explain to the machine that you aren’t dead as his hands rush to force you >>> into his bowels. >>> >>> Should you find yourself living out this horrible nightmare, don’t worry. >>> The inside of the robot constantly cycles fresh air, allowing you to breath >>> comfortably. Just try to keep that in mind as your lying on top of actual >>> dead bodies and trying to scratch your way out of your mobile metal coffin. >>> >>> Written by *Ben >>> Dennison<http://www.weirdworm.com/search.php?uri=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.lijit.com%2Fusers%2Fweirdworm&blog_uri=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.weirdworm.com%2F&blog_platform=&view_id=&link_id=48146&flavor=&q=Ben%20Dennison&lijit_q=Ben%20Dennison> >>> * – Copyrighted © www.weirdworm.com >>> >>> >>> - *– TOPIO *: >>> * >>> >>> http://i.telegraph.co.uk/telegraph/multimedia/archive/01530/topio_1530583i.jpg >>> * >>> - *– Roxxxy *: >>> * >>> >>> http://www.popsci.com/files/imagecache/article_image_large/articles/Sex%20Robot_doomsday_604x341.jpg >>> * >>> - *– The CB2 *: >>> *http://www.astrosurf.com/luxorion/Sciences/robot-cb2-full.jpg* >>> - *– Robokiyu *: >>> * >>> >>> http://img.allabout.co.jp/Live/living/bosai/closeup/CU20020921A/DSCF2468.jpg >>> * >>> >>> >>> 78Share<http://www.facebook.com/sharer.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.weirdworm.com%2Ffour-frightening-and-real-robots%2F&t=Four%20Frightening%20%28and%20Real%29%20Robots%20-%20Weird%20Worm&src=sp> >>> >>> *SUBSCRIBE to Weird Worm Podcast at >>> iTunes<http://itunes.apple.com/podcast/weird-worm/id348449566>. >>> Don't forget to follow us on Facebook<http://www.facebook.com/weirdworm> >>> andTwitter <http://twitter.com/weirdworm>. If you are creative and >>> talented writer you should apply for job<http://www.weirdworm.com/jobs/> >>> .* >>> * >>> * >>> >>> >> >> >> -- >> "If all the world's a stage and we are merely players, who the bloody hell >> wrote the script?" -- Charles E Grant >> >> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fQUxw9aUVik >> >> >> > > -- "If all the world's a stage and we are merely players, who the bloody hell wrote the script?" -- Charles E Grant http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fQUxw9aUVik
