Re: A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular!
Re: A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular! I used Plenty of Fish and it was fine. Not the best but certainly usable. That was last year some time. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=183823#p183823 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular!
Re: A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular! Well this is interesting. Only problemis the only place I mee people with any consistency is a Karaoke bar I go to as frequently as finances allow. And as a general rule one should never go to a bar to meet women or men. This isnt to say that some happy, lasting unions havent started at the bar, but I know myself and the kind of women who seem to be drawn to me. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=183840#p183840 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular!
Re: A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular! Welshweyr, yeah, I am well aware of being able to search for profiles based on various criteria like age, distance, hobbies, etc. One problem I consistently run into, and would like some advice on, is when to bring up the Im blind topic on dating sites.Ive noticed if I state up front and center I am blind on my profile nobody messages me at all. I am certain that being honest and trying to let women know of my disabilities is a huge hindrance to my getting dates via Match.com and other dating sites. Blindness being viewed as it is by 99% of non-disabled people Im frankly not surprised why being open and honest has lead to less than favorable results.On the other hand I have tried not to mention my blindness until necessary and some women have gotten offended, frankly pissed off, that I didnt tell them until I did. that has killed a number of budding romances just because the woman thought I should have told her right up front, and I chose to wait until we had some sort of re pore before slipping into the conversation that I am blind. So regardless if I wait or not to tell a woman Im blind it is a definite relationship killer.Unfortunately, I do see their point of view. In one case I was trying to set up a date with this young lady, and she naturally assumed Id come and pick her up. I told her I was unable to drive. She wanted to know why. Thats when I chose to tell her I was blind and that shed have to come pick me up, or Id have to have someone drop me off at her place. She got angry and chopped me off at the knees then and there. Her anger was mainly aimed at the fact I had been messaging her for several days, talked to her on the phone a couple of times, and I had failed to mention my blindness until I absolutely had to. The worst part is I do understand her anger, understand how and why she feels lied to, but I didnt see I had much choice.For me that is my biggest problem with online dating. Before when I was in high school, college, met someone at a club, I could be open and honest about my blindness from the second I met the young lady and if I asked her out on a date I didnt have to figure out when to mention my disability. She already knew from our face to face meeting. With online dating it feels like my blindness is the proverbial elephant in the room. If I state my blindness on my profile women will reject me on that basis before even getting to know me. If I wait to tell them a few days later etc they will take it out on me for keeping it a secret. Its a lose/lose situation. So Id like to know how other blind guys have handled this thorny problem. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=183864#p183864 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular!
Re: A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular! I put my blindness on my profile. I know its frustrating but a person who rejects you on the basis of that one fact, which is totally beyond your control, is somebody you probably didnt want to know in the first place.Having said that, there is a way to handle it. Dont lead with the blindness on your description. If thats the first thing someone sees (pardon the pun), thats what theyll immediately make the deciion on. Talk about yourself a bit first so women can see that youre a normal person with a disability rather than a disabled person trying to be normal. If someone thinks oh [[wow]], this guy likes the same books and music as me and is an animal enthusiast and good cook to boot. The fact that youre blind will be noticed but will be a lower ranking factor than the connection on hobbies, interest and personalities.Also, focus on what you can do. Dont say that youre blind and that that means y ou need help with this and that. Say that youre blind but that ladies shouldnt panic because you manage cooking and housework better than most men who can see, or something like that. Make it a kind of joke or something that youre comfortable with and have overcome. If youre comfortable with it, and that comes across in your profile, prospective dates will be cool with it as well.It may well put people off but at least you wont know because they wont have contacted you in the first place. What you dont know cant hurt you, remember, so it will always feel worse to be knocked back by a woman who feels lied to through no fault of your own than just not getting as many messages from people you quite frankly probably dont want to hear from in the first place. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=183869#p183869 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular!
Re: A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular! Dudes, just be yourselves! Ive had both long and short relationships. Ive pulled at parties, used online dating, got girlfriends at school and work and had relationships with people I met for the purpose or knew already. The way I did it was to be myself. The thing that is guaranteed to get a woman more than all this love ninja stuff is a guy who is content to be himself. If youre relaxed and genuine, and your lady can see that, she will respond far better than if you try all the smooth lines and special touching in the world.Before any responds, please realise that this is meant to be advice. Im not judging anyone elses approach but this is, in my opinion, the number one way to find a girlfriend. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=183637#p183637 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular!
Re: A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular! Interesting enough these days its not picking up a girl that is the problem. It is finding them, getting out to where single women are, that is becoming difficult. Im in my mid 30s, not in college, dont go to church, and there isnt much in my area for singles to hang out and do much together. So Im being forced to search online, look at online personals, which is proving difficult to find anyone to date period. If anyone has any good ideas for where a guy who is not quite long in the tooth can find women to meet let me know. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=183665#p183665 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular!
Re: A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular! Im 30 and Im an advocate of online dating. You can search by criteria like hobbies a person is into, set age limits or distance from your home address and even judge by how they describe themselves if physical attractiveness is that important to you. The most important thing with online dating though is patience. Women on dating sites always get spammed by sleezy guys asking for sex or trying to be macho so the way to combat that is to be normal. Read through profiles and find out what you and the other person have in common so you can message them about something genuine. You may have to message loads of people and it may take months to find people in your area but many sites let you see the people who have viewed your profile so you can see who liked what you said about yourself, even if they didnt message you afterwards. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=183720#p183720 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular!
Re: A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular! Speaking of online dating, are there any accessible free dating sites? I know some people who have tried plenty of fish, but most.people say its not accessible anymore. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=183752#p183752 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular!
Re: A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular! I have major difficulty in the flirting department, since I am totally blind. Honestly, if Im dating someone, I dont care if she looks or sounds like the creature from the black lagoon. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=183442#p183442 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular!
Re: A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular! Honestly, I find this kind of stuff invaluable. This is information Ive always wanted to get other peoples thoughts on, but didnt really know how or who to ask, you know? URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=183221#p183221 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular!
Re: A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular! [[wow]], Awesome story! URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=182915#p182915 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular!
Re: A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular! Hey man, love the story. A little advice from someone who has had the same girl for 6 years now. Dont be afraid to dive right in and express your feelings to this girl. Tell her that you are interested in her and want to possibly date. The worst thing that could happen is she turns you down, and you go after someone else. While this might seem abrupt, its better to know how she feels than to beat around the bush for an eternity. Ill put it this way, in my oppinion, if you want to get her in the bedroom, dont be afraid to man up, and make it clear how you feel. If shes to fradgile to take your abruptness, thats ok, it may explain more about her personallity than just a couple dates could teach you. The best type of women in my view, are the ones who know what they want, and arent afraid of honesty or physical contact and affection. Just my thoughts, your milage may very. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=182957#p182957 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular!
Re: A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular! At arqmeister:exactly! You are totally right! Although I am much more comfortable expressing my feelings with actions. I am extraordinarily Kinesthetic, so find that actions speak louder than words. In my experience, it is pretty clear to the girl that I would like out of the friend zone after the first kiss.I have been known to scare off girls because I come off as Too intense when I try and use words to express myself. I tend to write poetry and music about and to the girls Ive dated. But, Ive found that maybe one poem, or one thing of that nature is appropriate, I dont give her everything when I write it.I believe it comes down to the intensity build-up. How have you dealt with managing that?Although back to what you said, I can totally understand where you are coming from. Most girls have a very difficult time transitioning from The Friend Zone to a dating relationship with blind guys. This is why I have kind of worked my dating criteria down to a science. What do I want from a girl:1. She must have a good mind on her.2. She must be physically attractive3. She must have a very pleasant speaking voice.For any girl the first and the last I can almost pick up instantly. For the second one, I need to do sighted guide in order to tell.So for dating, if a girl has 2 in abundance, I will ask her out as soon as I can.For the girl Im going out with on Friday, She has the first and last one in over abundance, but Ive never managed to touch her. I have, however, done sighted-guide with both her parents and her sister is a ballerina, so Im 99.9% sure she fits my physical attractiveness criteria quite nicely.(Although the first girl I dated had a really tall, slender family, but she was kind of short and chubby. It was medical though, and not something she got from her parents, so I felt fine dating her.But for this girl Im going out with on Friday This is how we met:I was invited to a birthday party of one of our cast members and I killed the competition they had for baking (Baking is incredibly sexy now a days, How many girls do you know cook? I can think of maybe 1 out of every 5...) and so that helped. I had gotten a ride there from another one of our cast members. In the party I was doing the scoping out and nothing had blared Date me! from any of the girls, but there was some that I needed to know a little more.When the cast member who was giving me a ride said he and his wife were ready to go, I departed wearing my master of the feast crown and when I got out side, I realized they were giving a girl a ride to the subway.I got into the car and scooted to the far-side. The girl got in and I was looking at her (Girls like to know you are looking at them and it is normal, even though you cant see a thing). And she turned her head to look at me a nd she paused for a second. This was a pretty solid Im interested sign In my opinion. And I like girls who are that clear to read.I instantly started on the questions, because she had number 3 and quickly got her name, (full name and facebook name) realized who her parents were and where she knew me from. (She was in the chorus and I was a lead. She also said that her dad would not let her study voice and she was studying psychology.So I got:Who she was,What she does,(I didnt get when she was free)Where she is fromWhy I should date herShe then departed to the subway and I went home and added her on facebook. I asked her if she wanted to go to this eatery on Wednesday. I thought that a dinner before rehearsal would be not too bad. She messaged me back and let me know there was not rehearsal and she would be glad to go on that day. I then asked her for when she was free.She gave me her schedule and we made a Wednesday date. I got her number (Just in case I couldnt find her at the subway you know? ). She texted me on Tuesday and said that her work asked her to sub for a special event they were having, so she could only do a 30 minute lunch. I said that if we did do Wednesday, we would need to meet again very soon so we could have time to enjoy it. Then I asked her when she would like to have the second time be?She texted me back and said Friday. She texted me again and said that the Wednesday time would not work well because everything would need to be perfect conditions (no late subway, no line at the eatery... in order for us to get the 30 minutes. I texted her back and said I agree. So Friday at 2 is a date! See you then! She responded with Yes, see you Friday! So we set 2 hours for Friday and it is in her mind that it may be a ot;Date! I will insist on buying her lunch and that will solidify the Date status.This was all without touching her and Ive gotten to talk to her maybe 8 minutes ever... URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=182974#p182974 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list
Re: A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular!
Re: A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular! I must say though, this month has been rather full of girls... Ive met 3 that scream Date me and Ive asked out 2. One did the classic flake on me, one Im following the advice of my friend, so Im not talking to her for a couple days and the third one Ive got a date on Friday with.This is completely uncharacteristic of me, I maybe find one girl every 2-3 months, never 3! And on a summer! Life couldnt be better LOL...Part of it is that Im leaving in September and that is putting on the Fast and Furious flag on everything.It is my personal goal to get laid before September.It has never happened to me before (The time it did almost happen I was too sick to enjoy it, but thats another story).So getting laid is always on my mind, but now it is kind of front and center. Im going to establish that is what I want as soon as I can. I will tell them Im leaving in September right u p front, so they will know this will be short.Any ideas on how I can ask for sex tactfully? Above it says to move the touching along, grab the first kiss ASAP and make some sex jokes right off the bat. Im not looking for a 1-night stand, more a 1 month-stand. So kind of a mixture of both techniques Im thinking will work.What do you think? URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=182976#p182976 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular!
Re: A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular! Well, with my girlfriend, i simply asked her for sex. It sounds crazy i know, but i think sometimes, you just have to deal with the intensity and go for it. Again, the worst that could happen, is you get rejected. But, from what you describe, you probably wont have a problem if you play your cards right. I will say this, there is almost a certain feeling that goes along with finding the right girl to have sex with. Its almost like, you know in your mind that if you asked her, she would say yes. Its a spir of the moment feeling, and i went with it, and it payed off. Keep in mind, that a lot of people might say that the advice i just wrote is horrible, but im telling you, you just have to push forward, and go with what feels right, or you wont ever figure out if you could have gotten her in bed. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=182986#p182986 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular!
A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular! Hello,After a night where I was millimeters away from having a woman I met 4 hours before spend the night, I started looking for ways I could have improved my performance.Dr. NerdLovewas a website that seemed to have answers to many of my questions and also addressed many I had seen on this forum.It deals with issues fromwhen to pop the kisshow to make a kiss mind-blowingMindsetFlirtingHow to come off as more attractiveHow to touch herand hundreds of other articles. They are chock full of movie examples, pictures with really funny captions (I dont need to know what they are of in order to laugh) and from what Ive read, it fits into my experience.I was considering (and still may) write a blog on my social interactions as a blind person, but this website just answers most of the questions Ive had to deal with so beautifully.I also google the questions I have in relationships and another good place to look (although you need to take what they say with a grain of salt) is wikiHow.In particular, the articles I read today were:How to touch a girlHow to Physically Flirt with a GirlFor those who wish to know, I was in the prime environment (which Ive never been in before). One of my older friend s takes a huge thrill out of connecting people both for business and I guess relationships.He invited me to a concert (for those who dont know, Im an Opera singer, so am partial to any live music). Unbeknownst to me, he had invited a single girl who was a singer/songwriter along on the ride. So when he picked me up in his car, he went right into the art of match-making. It isnt like they show it on the movies. It was very clever and Im in awe that my friend was able to pull it off.He first introduced this girl to me (IDK if it was purposeful or not, her name was the same as one of my Xs who Im kind of still in love with) and said she was the Taylor swift of the town. He then had her play some of her music (He told her to play the very best ones that were her favorite) and he guessed I would like.He also made it quite clear to me right up front that she was single. I believe he had her play a song with a guy singing along wi th her and of coarse I asked her who that guy was and she said A friend and I asked her about the different people she jams with and whatnot. I know that it is very rare for a girl like that to date anyone who is not a musician, so it pretty much put up the Im single flag in my mind.Second, my friend parked and went off to check into the performance space and left me and the girl to get places in the restaurant alone together. This did two things:1. It allowed me to do sighted-guide with her which gave me an idea of her physical attractiveness. My friend knew the kind of girls I like (Pretty much slender and not taller than me) and 2. gave us time to talk.Im not sure if my friend did this intentionally, but for lack of doubting his mastery, Ill just say he knew it all along for the rest of the story).It was an Italian eatery and we happened to both be going to Italy in the next couple months.So we g ot talking about that and my friend came back. We ordered and the girl and my friend started talking about some guy she wanted to go out with. My friend started giving romantic advice. My panini came and I intently ate my food, trying not to hear the conversation.But for lack of a better excuse, Im a very proficient eves-dropper, so If that conversation didnt tell me that this girl was single, I dont know what would have.It also told me that my friend wanted me to hear this conversation and one of the questions my friend asked her was Are you willing to be set-up? Which means Are you willing to go on a blind date? And she gave the typical answer that shes willing to, but she needs to know the guy is not a horrible person.But more importantly, this was basically what my friend had done to me, He had texted me like 5 days before, asking me if I wanted to go to a concert. He wouldnt tell me anything about the conce rt other than the start time, end time and maybe the cost.Then when he picked me up it was with this attractive, single lady who was wishing for a boy-friend. My friend asked the questions one should ask of a potential date and made it clear that I knew:1. the girl drove to his house to drive with him2. He was way to old for her3. she was willing and open to a relationship4. The kind of guys she preferred were musicians, sweet and forward.5. She was not sure what she wanted in a relationship (She was one of those people who cant make up their minds what they want and are looking for their prince-charming to come sweep them off their feet)6. He managed to insert into a conversation that he was having fun connecting couples with one another and that is what he had been doing the last couple weeks.He then introduced us to a couple he had matched a while back and that were going out. At this point I was completely sure t
A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular!
A fantastic resource on how to have a lovelife for guys in poticular! Hello,After a night where I was millimeters away from having a woman I met 4 hours before spend the night, I started looking for ways I could have improved my performance.Dr. NerdLovewas a website that seemed to have answers to many of my questions and also addressed many I had seen on this forum.It deals with issues fromwhen to pop the kisshow to make a kiss mind-blowingMindsetFlirtingHow to come off as more attractiveHow to touch herand hundreds of other articles. They are chock full of movie examples, pictures with really funny captions (I dont need to know what they are of in order to laugh) and from what Ive read, it fits into my experience.I was considering (and still may) write a blog on my social interactions as a blind person, but this website just answers most of the questions Ive had to deal with so beautifully.I also google the questions I have in relationships and another good place to look (although you need to take what they say with a grain of salt) is wikiHow.In particular, the articles I read today were:How to touch a girlHow to Physically Flirt with a GirlFor those who wish to know, I was in the prime environment (which Ive never been in before). One of my older friend s takes a huge thrill out of connecting people both for business and I guess relationships.He invited me to a concert (for those who dont know, Im an Opera singer, so am partial to any live music). Unbeknownst to me, he had invited a single girl who was a singer/songwriter along on the ride. So when he picked me up in his car, he went right into the art of match-making. It isnt like they show it on the movies. It was very clever and Im in awe that my friend was able to pull it off.He first introduced this girl to me (IDK if it was purposeful or not, her name was the same as one of my Xs who Im kind of still in love with) and said she was the Taylor swift of the town. He then had her play some of her music (He told her to play the very best ones that were her favorite) and he guessed I would like.He also made it quite clear to me right up front that she was single. I believe he had her play a song with a guy singing along wi th her and of coarse I asked her who that guy was and she said A friend and I asked her about the different people she jams with and whatnot. I know that it is very rare for a girl like that to date anyone who is not a musician, so it pretty much put up the Im single flag in my mind.Second, my friend parked and went off to check into the performance space and left me and the girl to get places in the restaurant alone together. This did two things:1. It allowed me to do sighted-guide with her which gave me an idea of her physical attractiveness. My friend knew the kind of girls I like (Pretty much slender and not taller than me) and 2. gave us time to talk.Im not sure if my friend did this intentionally, but for lack of doubting his mastery, Ill just say he knew it all along for the rest of the story).It was an Italian eatery and we happened to both be going to Italy in the next couple months.So we g ot talking about that and my friend came back. We ordered and the girl and my friend started talking about some guy she wanted to go out with. My friend started giving romantic advice. My panini came and I intently ate my food, trying not to hear the conversation.But for lack of a better excuse, Im a very proficient eves-dropper, so If that conversation didnt tell me that this girl was single, I dont know what would have.It also told me that my friend wanted me to hear this conversation and one of the questions my friend asked her was Are you willing to be set-up? Which means Are you willing to go on a blind date? And she gave the typical answer that shes willing to, but she needs to know the guy is not a horrible person.But more importantly, this was basically what my friend had done to me, He had texted me like 5 days before, asking me if I wanted to go to a concert. He wouldnt tell me anything about the conce rt other than the start time, end time and maybe the cost.Then when he picked me up it was with this attractive, single lady who was wishing for a boy-friend. My friend asked the questions one should ask of a potential date and made it clear that I knew:1. the girl drove to his house to drive with him2. He was way to old for her3. she was willing and open to a relationship4. The kind of guys she preferred were musicians, sweet and forward.5. She was not sure what she wanted in a relationship (She was one of those people who cant make up their minds what they want and are looking for their prince-charming to come sweep them off their feet)6. He managed to insert into a conversation that he was having fun connecting couples with one another and that is what he had been doing the last couple weeks.He then introduced us to a couple he had matched a while back and that were going out. At this point I was completely sure t
