On Wed, 6 Sep 2017 17:18:40 +0300
Anton Torkunov wrote:
> Hello everyone!
Hi alone!!
> I've tried to backup host via rsyncd, but got error: Backup aborted
> (unexpected response: '')
>
> rsyncd is well configured, because If I try to run just rsync,
> everything is fine:
>
> rsync rsync://orange.vpn/root/
I suspect some very bad black magic here.
As you know, or should know, 'orange' is the name of a telecom
monopolistic company formerly called 'france telecom' in france, as such,
these people are very angry and resentful because they lost their
privileges when this company was privatized.
So, in order to get back their former position and revenge, they swear to
indefinitely devote themselves to the mighty god "unanswered
call" and goddess "twisted pair copper" (very filthy this one).
So, as my BPC crystal balls say, there is a very high possibility they
took offense of your machine name, stole you the digital equivalent of a
beard hair or hair strand in the form of a byte from your browser and
stuffed it in a tux puppet representing your computer.
To achieve their miserable goal, they hired a very cruel and powerful
Russo-Chinese warlock, who's in fact half Béninois (from Bénin) by the
cousin of the half-sister's of his grand-aunt's cleaning lady.
As you know, or should know, Bénin was formerly called Dahomet and is
considered to be the mother country of voodoo.
So, each time you try to BPC you're machine, he plunges little darts in
his tux puppet and mutter a devilish incantation to make your live
miserable.
So, your only solution is to jump in a plane going to Haïti and once
there, ask for Robert Duval tomb, but you can only ask a 34 years old
virgin ginger girl born on February 29th, and you must do this at
exactly midnight a night of full moon.
Once you'll know where it is, you'll have to wait for the next red moon
and be standing in front of the grave at 11:47:29PM precisely, then
you'll have to sing the salve regina three times in a row not missing a
music note, a word and sing them in the right tune - DO NOT accelerate
the tempo, it would amplify the problem, making it almost impossible to
solve. Then you'll kneel and wait for Robert Duval to raise from the dead
(NB: this might take some time, depending on his mood, YMMV.)
When he'll be out, you will ask him how to get rid of this curse, but
the most important is to NOT forget to offer him a little goat (less
than 1 year old but more than 11 months and 25 days) named Patricia
that you brought with you, because not doing so would nullify your
quest.
Once you'll get your answer, you'll only have 2 hours to go back home
and ward the curse off, otherwise you'll have to do it all over again
from the beginning. Your chances of success can be evaluated to ~8%;
there is another way to achieve that, but it is so terrible that nobody
wants to talk about it.
> 64 bytes from orange (192.168.220.27): icmp_seq=1 ttl=64 time=8.25 ms
> --- orange.vpn ping statistics ---
> 1 packets transmitted, 1 received, 0% packet loss, time 0ms
> rtt min/avg/max/mdev = 8.259/8.259/8.259/0.000 ms
I guess this terrible timing is due to the VPN liaison
> At the client side (rsyncd):
Hmm, did you try with the rsync method instead of the rsyncd one?
I remember, long time ago, I had some problems with rsyncd and BPC
in the same LAN - may be it was my fault, may be not, my notes juste say
not to use rsyncd.
> Could you help me to fix the issue???
Nope, it is in Robert Duval's hands from now.
> Anton
Jean-Yves
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