Re: The Return Of The Cows
Julia wrote: Less methane in the atmosphere? I don't know for sure. Angus-ing here. Jersey that, folks? He made a cow pun. :) Pretty cheesy don't ya think? -- Doug ___ http://www.mccmedia.com/mailman/listinfo/brin-l
Re: The Return Of The Cows
Rob left out: Motown Capitalism. You have two cows because you herd it from the bovine. Vilyehm ___ http://www.mccmedia.com/mailman/listinfo/brin-l
Re: The Return Of The Cows
Jewish Capitalism: You have two cows. You set them on fire and they burn for 8 days. Actually, it should be: Jewish Capitalism: You have two cows. You complain they never call you. --- Tom Beck my LiveJournal: http://www.livejournal.com/users/tomfodw/ I always knew I'd see the first man on the Moon. I never thought I'd see the last. - Dr. Jerry Pournelle --- ___ http://www.mccmedia.com/mailman/listinfo/brin-l
Re: The Return Of The Cows
- Original Message - From: Thomas Beck [EMAIL PROTECTED] To: Killer Bs Discussion [EMAIL PROTECTED] Sent: Saturday, April 17, 2004 5:35 AM Subject: Re: The Return Of The Cows Jewish Capitalism: You have two cows. You set them on fire and they burn for 8 days. Actually, it should be: Jewish Capitalism: You have two cows. You complain they never call you. I agree, that is funnier. I suppose I just don't *get* the burning for eight days reference. I can think of another variation though: Jewish Capitalism: You have two cows. Every farm around you for miles keeps goats and wants your cows for themselves. xponent M Maru rob ___ http://www.mccmedia.com/mailman/listinfo/brin-l
Re: The Return Of The Cows
Robert Seeberger wrote: - Original Message - From: Thomas Beck [EMAIL PROTECTED] To: Killer Bs Discussion [EMAIL PROTECTED] Sent: Saturday, April 17, 2004 5:35 AM Subject: Re: The Return Of The Cows Jewish Capitalism: You have two cows. You set them on fire and they burn for 8 days. Actually, it should be: Jewish Capitalism: You have two cows. You complain they never call you. I agree, that is funnier. I suppose I just don't *get* the burning for eight days reference. I can think of another variation though: Jewish Capitalism: You have two cows. Every farm around you for miles keeps goats and wants your cows for themselves. Would that be Jewish Capitalism, or Israeli Capitalism? Julia ___ http://www.mccmedia.com/mailman/listinfo/brin-l
Re: The Return Of The Cows
Robert Seeberger wrote: - Original Message - From: Thomas Beck [EMAIL PROTECTED] To: Killer Bs Discussion [EMAIL PROTECTED] Sent: Saturday, April 17, 2004 5:35 AM Subject: Re: The Return Of The Cows Jewish Capitalism: You have two cows. You set them on fire and they burn for 8 days. Actually, it should be: Jewish Capitalism: You have two cows. You complain they never call you. I agree, that is funnier. I suppose I just don't *get* the burning for eight days reference. I'm guessing it has to do with when they were trying to light lamps in the temple and they didn't have much oil, but what they had lasted 8 days, and then Hanukkah was created to celebrate this. Why you'd light your cow on fire for the purpose, though, is beyond me. :) Julia ___ http://www.mccmedia.com/mailman/listinfo/brin-l
Re: The Return Of The Cows
Thomas Beck wrote: Jewish Capitalism: You have two cows. You set them on fire and they burn for 8 days. Actually, it should be: Jewish Capitalism: You have two cows. You complain they never call you. Or: Jewish Capitalism: You have two cows. Your palestin neighbour has a (baby cow? what's the english name for that?). His (baby cow) goes to your farm to suicide-bomb and kill your cows. Alberto Monteiro ___ http://www.mccmedia.com/mailman/listinfo/brin-l
Re: The Return Of The Cows
Alberto Monteiro wrote: Jewish Capitalism: You have two cows. Your palestin neighbour has a (baby cow? what's the english name for that?). Calf. Also used for elephant and whale babies. __ Steve Sloan . Huntsville, Alabama = [EMAIL PROTECTED] Brin-L list pages .. http://www.brin-l.org Science Fiction-themed online store . http://www.sloan3d.com/store Chmeee's 3D Objects http://www.sloan3d.com/chmeee 3D and Drawing Galleries .. http://www.sloansteady.com Software Science Fiction, Science, and Computer Links Science fiction scans . http://www.sloan3d.com ___ http://www.mccmedia.com/mailman/listinfo/brin-l
Re: The Return Of The Cows
Steve Sloan II wrote: Alberto Monteiro wrote: Jewish Capitalism: You have two cows. Your palestin neighbour has a (baby cow? what's the english name for that?). Calf. Also used for elephant and whale babies. And part of the leg. And a chunk of ice split off from a glacier. (Just to confuse the issue, in case anyone had any doubt about my motives.) Julia ___ http://www.mccmedia.com/mailman/listinfo/brin-l
Re: The Return Of The Cows
In a message dated 4/17/2004 1:44:07 PM US Mountain Standard Time, [EMAIL PROTECTED] writes: Why you'd light your cow on fire for the purpose, though, is beyond me. :) Julia Less methane in the atmosphere? I don't know for sure. Angus-ing here. Vilyehm ___ http://www.mccmedia.com/mailman/listinfo/brin-l
Re: The Return Of The Cows
[EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote: In a message dated 4/17/2004 1:44:07 PM US Mountain Standard Time, [EMAIL PROTECTED] writes: Why you'd light your cow on fire for the purpose, though, is beyond me. :) Julia Less methane in the atmosphere? I don't know for sure. Angus-ing here. Jersey that, folks? He made a cow pun. :) Julia ___ http://www.mccmedia.com/mailman/listinfo/brin-l
The Return Of The Cows
Capitalism for Dummies Traditional Capitalism: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income. American Capitalism: You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. You are surprised when the cow drops dead. French Capitalism: You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three cows. Japanese Capitalism: You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create cow cartoon images called Cowkimon and market them World-Wide. German Capitalism: You have two cows. You reengineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves. Italian Capitalism: You have two cows, but you don't know where they are. You break for lunch. British Capitalism: You have two cows. Both are mad. Russian Capitalism: You have two cows. You count them and learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them again and learn you have 12 cows. You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka. Arkansas Capitalism: You have two cows. That one on the left is kinda cute... Hindu Capitalism: You have two cows. You worship them. Swiss Capitalism: You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you. You charge others for storing them. Canadian Capitalism: You have two cows. LetÂ’s make a hockey team, eh? Chinese Capitalism: You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who reported the numbers. Irish Capitalism: You have two cows. You feed them potatoes and wonder why they emigrate. Israeli Capitalism: So, there are these two Jewish cows, right? They open a milk factory, an ice cream store, and then sell the movie rights. They send their calves to Harvard to become doctors. So, who needs people? Enron Capitalism: You have two cows. You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. Sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States, leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the release. The public buys your bull. Cuban Capitalism: You have two cows. They try to swim to Florida. Politically Correct Capitalism: You are associated with (the concept of ownership is a symbol of the phallo centric, war mongering, intolerant past) two differently - aged (but no less valuable to society) bovines of non-specified gender. Disney Capitalism: You have two cows. They dance sing. Microsoft Capitalism: You have two cows. You patent them and sue anyone else who has them. Hollywood Capitalism: You have two cows. You give them utter implants and also teach them to bullet-dodge, wall climb and shoot milk out of their utters on command. Clinton Capitalism: You have two cows. You deny any knowledge of them. Bureaucratic Capitalism: You have two cows. They are cared for by ex-chicken farmers. You have to take care of the chickens the government took from the chicken farmers. The government gives you as much milk and eggs the regulations say you should need. Gore Capitalism: You have two cows. You claim you invented them. Real-World Capitalism: You have two cows. You share two cows with your neighbors. You and your neighbors bicker about who has the most ability and who has the most need. Meanwhile, no one works, no one gets any milk, and the cows drop dead of starvation. Australian Capitalism: You have two cows. You try to wrestle them. Iraqi Capitalism: You have two cows. They are biochemical weapons. Perestroika Capitalism: You have two cows. You have to take care of them, but the government takes all the milk. You steal back as much milk as you can and sell it on the black market. Jewish Capitalism: You have two cows. You set them on fire and they burn for 8 days. Cambodian Capitalism: You have two cows. The government takes both and shoots you. Mormon Capitalism: You have two cows. You tell everyone that they should as well. Military Capitalism: You have two cows. The government takes both and drafts you. Texan Capitalism: You have two cows. You teach them to fire guns. Totalitarian Capitalism: You have two cows. The government takes them and denies they ever existed.
