[gay_bombay] Re: Re: [lgbt-india] QueerIndia: Another one bites the dust

2004-09-16 Thread Vivek R Anand

P
dear abhi,BR
BR
to say that i am proud of you would be an understatement. I have seen you all along 
through the ups and downs in life and despite all the turmoil that you have undergone 
I love you for being truthful and asking yourself a question that all gay men getting 
married should ask themselves quot; If i had to ask my sister to get married to a 
known gay friend (no matter how well behaved he may be) will i dare to do that? 
quot;BR
BR
I wish more and more gay men would ask themselves this question ??BR
BR
I am posting your message on some other groups as well on which you do not subscribe. 
I am doing it in good faith with a sincere hope that your message is seen in a 
positive light.BR
BR
VickyBR
BR
Note : here is a message that Abhi posted on LGBT India group and I hope folks on the 
list would ignore the gramatical errors in his mail and read the thought behind.BR
BR
BR
On Wed, 15 Sep 2004 abhi lad wrote :BR
gt;Hi to all,BR
gt;Well for me this is very serious matter!! Will not say diappointing but will 
always reflet the views of many youngsters who are at the crucial stage dealing with 
one's sexuality.BR


gt;I had come out to my parents Four years ago when i was 22 years old. For me it was 
really difficult task at that time because i belonged to middle class maharastriyan 
background. The responses from my parents were negative and it was difficult for me to 
deal with the situation at that time and i think if The Humsafar Trust counselors were 
not their it would have been unachievable task for me.BR

gt;Today me and my parents stand on seperate platforms where both of us stand on our 
decision about our own views and understandings.BR
gt;Well, the reason i gave this background becuase in these last four years as an 
individual i myself have gone through lot of ups and down in my person life and 
relationships. Honestly, there were occassions when certain down shattery moment in my 
life made me rethink about my decision about being gay and living life lonely. I had 
discussed various issues especially as support system,nbsp; depressions, mood swing 
with my immediate freind cirle - within and outside the community.BR

gt;Surprisingly, my straight freinds had envy myself for being gay and living the 
life of my own choices on many occassions. Personally, i myself have gone through a 
lots of trouma for not being able to achieve desired support system within the 
community on certain occassions.BR

gt;At one point i thought probably that should be the reason for me to get married to 
a girl and in return i will at least get some support system from other partner. 
.BR
gt;A sudden thought occured immediately to me that, If i had ask my sister to get 
married to the known gay friend (no matter how well behaved he may be) will i dare to 
do that? Immediate response was not at any cost. Because marriage is not just a 
ritual, a relationship is always formed on basic foundation called quot;Trustquot;. 
After marriage is my gay friend is going to be truly honest to my sister and the 
answer was..NO.BR

gt;Then what right i have ruin somebodies life when i know that my mental and sexual 
preference is man and not a women. And it dose not have any linkage of being able to 
satisfy your own wife or not but it is of course has lot to do being honest to your 
spouce who is married cosidering yourself trustworthy.BR
gt;Though we all look for suport system within the community,nbsp; their is 
absolutely no harm in building support system of your close hetrosexual freinds who 
will extend to warm and support to you in long run. We all should understand being a 
gay dose not cut us out from the society. a support system will automatically 
developed around your if you adopt freindly approach to the freinds near to your heart 
and understand you and give them equal importance in your life. Many time being gay we 
all rely / focus / emphasise so much in our relatioship and search outway of getting 
married in case the relationship dose not work.BR


gt;A support system is always cosidered as family and if you are building the same 
then make sure that you work on this principle that quot;Keep Smiling and the World 
will smile back to youquot;.BR

gt;In current Indian scenario at least we have made an effort to bring the gay 
movement till this stage where every newspaper is talking about the isses relating to 
the community people. intellecuals are working with the social organizations like The 
Humsafar Trust who are working for male sexual health.BR
gt;At least we have come upto the point where we are visible to the society. Now 
honestly, its an individual responsibility as a self identified gay men to take this 
movement furher keeping our vision in mind. Those who wants to find outways to get 
married are not welcome in this fightBR

gt;Life will go on and their will be a time when married gay men will blame 
themselves for choosing these outways to get married. I hope all the 

Re: [gay_bombay] really astonishing to hear that a person close to gb and humsafar(got married)

2004-09-16 Thread prashanth prabhakar
Dear all,
 
It is sad indeed to know that a  person after so many years of living an open gay 
life,opted to marry a woman. 
It is indeed bad that a person who always claimed that he never had attraction for 
women, and who has been associated with groups like bombay dost can do this.If he has 
not told his future wife about his attraction towards men,it is even worse.I guess we 
need to respect women more than tat. I find that this number is more in India,
Since we do not know what made the person to take this step,
I am just seeing the causes wat could have made that person take this step.
 
1. Family pressures  
2. Indepth feeling of insecurity 
3. Failed relationships with other gay men and hence loss of hope 
4. Not confident about being single and still happy.
 
In my opinion and also according to studies,it seen that gays are unable to have 
successful relationships,leading to feelings of insecurity. Is it we are too 
particular  uncompromising or is it something we are trying to find and unable to do 
so. Or gay men are not relationshp oriented. Don't we have much choices to choose from 
amongst ourselves?. But it is alarming to note that if most of the indian gay men opt 
for marriage with females (after the fun phase is over and when they  want to settle 
down !!) it is like giving not much chance for themselves and to other potential life 
partners. 
 
What could be the causes/remedies. 
 
Any views most welcome...
 
Regds
Prash 
 
 
 

Nisha Maharshi [EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote:

Dear Nitin,

It was really astonishing to hear that a person who was a self-identified gay man, 10 
years of telling his father that he do not feel attracted to women but to men, 10 
years of interaction with gay men who are highly politicized, a lifetime of loving 
men. Who was very close to Bombay Dost and Humsafar parivar, who is someone who years 
ago co-founded a group for young gay men in Mumbai.

It is really not easy to accept that a Self Identified Gay person married to a 
FEMALE. A person says himself as Gay and one fine day, get married with femaleOh, 
whome should we belive ?? 



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[gay_bombay] goa

2004-09-16 Thread john ferns
Hi! 

I'm single, 43yrs, 5'6, 33w, 68kgs, short hair N
mustache, wheatish, str8 acting, good looking with a
good sense of humour, and NOW in Goa.

I would like to meet up for friendship and MORE, when
in Goa!   Am easy going,and NOT into looks. . . your smile is good
enough for me!! I do NOT like v.thin/fat guys and
DEFINITELY NO feminine guys!! I would prefer the beefy
(NOT fat)top type guys. 

If U feel we can be friends, mail FULL DETAILS to  
[EMAIL PROTECTED]   

All the best,

John



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[gay_bombay] Re: [Bombay-Dost] Thanks Vicky

2004-09-16 Thread Sanjay Lulla
good and what abt us step children outside the home
country are we welcome in the family?

Cheers
--- Nisha Maharshi [EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote:

Dear Vicky,

Yes, ARK (AMMA) is really a amazing person, he is anIdeal Gay person.  I was alway 
hearing about him and
since last 3 years, I see him in person and I feel
great to be a member of his family.  



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[gay_bombay] Queer Support Email Helpline of The Humsafar Trust

2004-09-16 Thread Bombay Dost
Queer Support e-mail helpline of The Humsafar Trust

Sometimes it is easier to write than to pick up the phone.

The Humsafar Trust introduced its e-mail helpline service some six 
months ago. We are  happy to inform that in this period we have been 
able to extend support to 318 gay men and transgendered men.

The Humsafar Trust's Queer Support e-mail helpline provides a free 
and confidential service where our professionally qualified advisors 
give a personal response to your e-mail enquiry.

The nature of advice and support:

If you have any questions related to your sexuality / identity, 
sexual health and human rights issues do write to us. 

We attempt to answer-

# Questions about your sexual or gender identity, as a person 
attracted to others of the same sex/gender, as a homosexual, 
bisexual, gay, queer, kothi, panthi, transgendered, intersexed.

#Questions relating to prevention, transmission and treatment of HIV 
and sexually transmitted infections

#Questions around legal (harassment at workplace, problems with the 
police, etc.) and social issues (like family acceptance, marriage 
pressures, coming out, etc.) or any issue related to your sexual 
orientation / gender identity/ sexual health and human rights.

We have a team of qualified Doctors, Counsellors, Mental Health 
Professionals, Clinical Psychologists and a Lawyer with access to 
wide range of up-to-date information and resources. This competent 
team answers your questions.

Please note this service is meant to provide general assistance and 
not to be treated as a substitute for medical, legal or other 
professional advice.

Confidentiality:

Our e-mail help line service is secure and confidential. We will only 
break confidentiality if there is a life-threatening situation. We 
take every measure available to protect the confidentiality of our 
users. However, please remember that YOUR computer stores copies of  
outgoing mail. To keep your message confidential from others who may 
use your computer, delete the copy in your `Sent Items' folder and 
check that our address has not been stored in the address box on your 
computer.

If you do not want to use your usual e-mail address for the purposes 
of this query you can choose a free web-based e-mail address such as 
those available through Yahoo, Hotmail or Netscape.

Sending a query and receiving our response:
When you contact us by e-mail we will ensure that our advisers reply 
to your query within 24 hours. Please bear in mind however; that in 
some specific cases it may take a little longer to reply.

We regret we cannot reply to forwarded e-mails.

Our Queer Support e-mail address: [EMAIL PROTECTED]

If you would like to call us by phone: 
The Humsafar Trust: (91-22) 
2665 0547, 26673800 
All working weekdays (2 p.m to 8 p.m.)

To consult our doctors / counselors, you can also visit our clinic on 
weekdays between 4.00pm and 8.00pm. The Humsafar Trust, 2nd floor, 
Municipal Market Building, Near Vakola Masjid, Vakola, Santa Cruz 
(East), Mumbai - 400 055.

Please do not abuse the help line by sending junk / spam mails.

This service is made available by professionals of The Humsafar Trust 
without attaching any cost to their time. We request that genuine 
queries be sent to respect their time and effort.

Vivek Anand
Chief Executive
The Humsafar Trust





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[gay_bombay] thought for the day

2004-09-16 Thread Roshan
Never sacrifice your life for anything! sacrifice everything for life! Life is the 
ultimate goal  - OSHO
 



With Love/Roshan

We are in Deep shit, therefore we walk with our head held  high.







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[gay_bombay] The World's Largest Online Library

2004-09-16 Thread ketan






http://www.questia.com/Index.jsp


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Re: [gay_bombay] high time not to glamorize/separate ourselves from mainstream

2004-09-16 Thread Kris Bass

Prash,

The whole point of such apparently pointless discussions can be
summarized in three small letters - FUN.

And nothing more.

Chill baby!

Cheers

Kris (s)
-- 
Remember that if men were not meant to be sucked, their bodies
wouldn't have come with a nozzle! - A Gay



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[gay_bombay] Maharashtra Times....

2004-09-16 Thread summer breeze



Hi all,

I read this joke in today's Maharashtra Times, on the first page of it's colour suppliment, Mumbai Times. A rough translation:

Why do the women neverfind handsome, sensetive and well behaved men?
Because all such men already have boyfriends!!

There issome positive progress in our marathi press.

Cheers
Shail
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[gay_bombay] Reply to Ajay Sharma

2004-09-16 Thread Nisha Maharshi




--- In [EMAIL PROTECTED], Ajay sharma [EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote:
Let the choice remain with all us as Individuals to decided what we do and want in life..and let us creat our hell/heavens as we want them for 


How about giving the same choice to your wife before marriage and see if she wants to get married to a guy who also gets attracted to other men ?

I think as an individual even she has a right to create her own hell or heaven.

NishaWith love

Nisha Maharshi
  
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Re: [gay_bombay] The Defence of Marriage Act (with apologies to Bush)

2004-09-16 Thread carl osmond


Viraf. WOW what an absolute gem!! I just wanted to
let u know  how happy I am to know such Giants grace
our presence. More power to u mate
Carl





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[gay_bombay] Reminder: The GayBombay Sunday Meet (19 Sept)

2004-09-16 Thread GayBombay events

We would like to remind you of this upcoming event.

The GayBombay Sunday Meet
(To know more about GayBombay Sunday Meets visit: 
http://www.gaybombay.cc/interact/meets.html)

Date: Sunday, September 19, 2004 
Time: 5:00PM - 6:00PM IST (GMT+05:30) 

Venue : We meet as usual at Just Around The Corner (JATC). JATC is a lovely snack bar 
at Bandra (West). 

At Bandra Station, on the WEST side, take a rickshaw to Turner Road; at Turner Road 
take a right at Tawaa Restaurant (you will see an ICICI Bank on your left after the 
turn). Keep going
straight for about two minutes; you will see the big blue signboard of 'JUST AROUND 
THE CORNER' on the left.

If you are however coming from Linking Road, take the very next left turn from the 
first petrol pump, leading to the Flying Machine Store. On driving down the crossing 
of two lanes you shall see a huge blue colored board with JUST AROUND THE CORNER 
written onto it.

You can also take a bus going down Turner Road (Khar Station bus or Chumm Village 
bus). Get off near Tawaa Restaurant and walk to JATC in 5 minutes.

Newcomers who have never come for a gay meeting and might be too nervous are 
particularly urged to come. The Gaybombay meetings are designed to be a safe and 
comfortable space in which to make your 
first contact with the community. If you have any specific questions on this, mail us 
at the addresses below or to the Neighbourhood Watch Resourse Person in your locality 
listed in the footer.

~~~
Note : 
1. Ensure that you get to JATC before 6:00 pm - in case the evening carries over to 
another gay-friendly place close by.

2. You have to be above the age of 18 to attend this event.

3. GB as a support group, has created this comfort/safe space for gays, many of whom 
may be newbies (those still coming to terms with their sexuality and who have 
mustered courage to come for such a meeting for the first time). So we request you to 
be sensitive to the comfort levels of others attending the meeting and behave and 
dress accordingly. 

4. To identify the group, look out for someone wearing a BLACK cap with 'gb' inscribed 
on it.

~
This is a GayBombay (gb) organized event 
Rights of admission reserved. 
If you have any further queries/questions please email at: [EMAIL PROTECTED] 
~ 



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opens

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[gay_bombay] Hi Everbody......

2004-09-16 Thread Rakesh subramanian



Dear All,

I would like to part of any group where I can feel free abour myself and meet self minded gay men.

Pls. let me know if there any such group and how can I contact them?

Rakesh__Do You Yahoo!?Tired of spam?  Yahoo! Mail has the best spam protection around http://mail.yahoo.com 


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[gay_bombay] goodlkg guy searching4a lifepartner 2 shower him with love!!

2004-09-16 Thread soulovable







Following is my profile which i have made for the gay classifieds::-
.I am 27 yrs old goodlooking gay guy from bombay,India,5ft,7"tall,30 waist,wheatish  belong 2 a well cultured family. .
I love to hold hands, cuddle up  sit by the tv with my lover lifepartner  love to listen 2 musici am a very mushy mushy kinda guybut remember mush only with the guy who makes me blush...(meaning no pre commitment sex for me)...
I am very caring , affectionate, loving  non-effeminate.
I can nurse you when you are ill ..be by ur bedside and take care of you no matter what happensor how long it takes.i`ll be there for you always !!...in ur highs and ur lows!!.
I am a die hard romantic ..i wud love to spend starry nights in the arms of my guy and walk in the moonlight no matter even if it is juhu chowpatty or venice beach...be it "caviar or vadapav in the candlelight."...nething tastes gr8 in the company of my guy!...
I beleive in sex only with my guy lifepartner  i am not going to marry a girl. I am saving my heart ,soul and body for my right guy. 
I am searching 4 a lifepartner who is lovable, caring ,non effiminate, some1 who loves life  is trustworthy, in his love4me .u can expect the same from me .. ..
ofcourse friendship comes first and we have to see if we like each other and find our soulmates in each other .for all this we have to start with friendship 
If we click, i assure u undivided love,care support in all ur ups  downs , understanding , trust, lots of love  affection so much so that God forbids even if ur paralysed, i`ll still stand by u  take care of u  my love, affection 2wards u shall never change. I mean it from the bottom of my heart. ..
waiting eagerly for ur reply!!...whatever it is please reply. 
Thanx for taking time out to read my long profile
YAHOO MESSENGER = soulovable
 email = [EMAIL PROTECTED] 

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