g_b India's first old age gay residential complex?

[lgbtindiagroup]

Home for greying gays in Gujarat
Soumik Dey 
Friday, October 05, 2007  09:01 IST
http://www.dnaindia.com/report.asp?newsid=1125612

An old age home for gays will soon come up on the banks of the 
Narmada in Gujarat to help them battle the problems they typically 
face in the autumn of their lives – loneliness and HIV/AIDS. The 
complex will come complete with a 200-bed hospital and crematorium 
to be built at a cost of Rs10 crore.

The scion of the erstwhile royal family of Rajpipla, Manavendrasingh 
Gohil, himself a gay activist, and a Canada-returned octogenarian 
are spearheading the move. The project has four acres and efforts 
are on to get more land. Octogenarian Jayant Trivedi donated land at 
Kumbheshwar about 15 kilometres from Rajpipla. Trivedi is currently 
engaged in securing another 11 acres from the Narmada district 
authorities for the project.

"Some initial hiccups in acquiring the land are being faced by us as 
the government is yet to clear whether the land could be donated to 
our registered trust Narmada Har Seva Ashram, or if it needs to be 
procured at a government valuation rate. I have written to the 
Gujarat Chief Minister two days back and am hoping that he will be 
sensitive to the cause of HIV/AIDS patients at least," said an 
optimistic Trivedi.

Gohil, who won an UNAIDS award for his work to contain the spread of 
HIV/AIDS in the community, said: "Back in the year 2000 when we were 
forming Lakshya Trust with a group of friends, we could forecast the 
scenario for gay men who mostly stay single and succumb to 
loneliness later in life. Young gay men have multiple partners but 
at an old age you will not be as attractive as you used to be and 
that leads to depression or to becoming a recluse." 

Insecurity runs high among greying gay men, he says. "As we get 
older we try to separate ourselves from the heterosexual society. 
Human beings are social animals but old gay men are deprived of any 
social binding. Since there are no social bindings in gay 
partnerships, breakups are often. This results in loneliness and 
insecurity." 

The trend of old age homes exclusively for gays first started in 
Berlin some three years back and has gained popularity in the US as 
well.

Re: g_b My Coming-out Experience

[Brian Dcosta]

Your story is very touching.
Thank you for sharing it.
Your concerns are just like mine. I have already come out to my parents.
They have not accepted my coming out as easily We are still going thru each
day at a time.

On 10/4/07, RAK SHAS <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
>Hi Guys,
>
>
>
> After much thought and deliberations, I write this piece about my
> "coming-out" to my family as a Gay person. I share my own experience with
> you all in a hope that it will help someone else in future, as countless
> others have helped me on this journey of mine. Having known that I was Gay,
> it never occured to me to be otherwise.It was easier for me to accept
> myself as I am. The next big issue for me was to come out to my immediate
> family.
>
>
>
> ...and so it happened in December 2003. My sister had called to enquire
> about my marriage plans or ask if I had someone in mind – someone I would
> like to marry. After much insisting, I had to tell her the truth since she,
> along with my cousins, had been planning my wedding for long! And to tell
> her I am Gay, was the most difficult thing to do because my sister and I
> share a very wonderful close-knit relationship. We had no secrets between us
> and were always there for each other. I had kept a secret from her, and
> hence when it was all out she was shocked because I hid such an important
> fact from her. She being a strong person, appeared calm on the outside and
> said to me that she was OK with whoever I am. It was later when my
> bro-in-law told me that I came to know that she took it pretty badly and it
> was hard for her to accept the fact that I was Gay. Eventually through a
> series of talks and sharing with me about being gay and the constant and
> unwavering support of my bro-in-law, she today has accepted me for what I
> am. In this whole episode my bro-in-law who is the most practical, balanced,
> cool, and rational man I ever came across also came to know about me being
> Gay and was a pillar of support for me and my sis. He stood strong as a
> friend to me and as an integral part to our family. He was like a rock
> amidst the storm of coming-out to my sis.
>
>
>
> Life took its turns and I ended up in Mumbai in 2005. My first ever GB
> parents meet was in 2006. The event was an eye-opener. For the first time I
> saw Indian parents who were supportive of their children and some were more
> forward and forthcoming in the battle of acceptance. This made me think
> whether I would be lucky enough with my parents accepting me as I am.
> Ever-since I came to terms with my sexuality I have had countless sleepless
> nights, nightmares, and absolute-dark-future-ahead-of-me kind of thoughts
> when it came to the idea of being open to my parents. Not only was I worried
> about if they would accept me, but also was afraid of their emotions being
> crushed and they getting disappointed in me. My parents' plight and the
> reactions of my family, my relatives and the society, while answering
> questions regarding my marriage was the constant thought running in my head!
> All this kept me awake through countless nights for a long time. Not to
> mention the burden and the tension of leading a double life, one for my
> parents and the society and one for myself within the confines of my heart
> and mind, took a toll on me.
>
> I always thought of having a partner in my life and to come out to my
> parents with him by my side so that my parents are assured that what I am
> saying is real and can be worked out in reality too. But fate had something
> else in mind. Incidentally I came out to my parents the very next day I
> broke up with my partner for 20 months, in March 2007. I know that it is not
> a long time to have been in a relationship but the time I spent in it was an
> eternity in itself for me to cherish. Well it so happened that my mom had
> given me a deadline to give her a final nod to get married which I had been
> evading for so long. So when I called up home that amazing Wednesday night
> after returning from office, my mom asked what my answer was to getting
> married. I said "Mom I don't want to get married to a girl because I don't
> like girls in that way or any way." to which she said "What do u mean?". As
> my dad was also listening to us talking he piped in from behind and said
> that "is he wanting to say that he is a 'homosexual'?". I said, "Yes, that's
> what I am... I am Gay and like guys to connect with emotionally, mentally,
> and physically". The immediate concern and reaction of my parents to my
> disclosure was that it is not natural and is this possible? Then I explained
> to them that it is as natural to me liking guys as it is natural for them to
> like each other. I also told them that "Being Gay is not something which was
> due to their lack of care or me or because of some kind of disease to be
> treated by a doctor, nor is it a mental aberration which can be fixed by a
> psychiatrist. It is as natural as someone having blond 

g_b English v/s Hindi

[Love is Life]

*English v/s Hindi*
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*Have a nice day!   Achcha din lo!*

*What's up?  - Uppar kya hai?*

*You're kidding! - Tum bachcha bana rahe ho!*

*Don't kid me! - Mera bachcha mat banaao! *

*Yo, baby! What's up? - Beti Yo, uppar kya hai?*

*Cool man! - Thandaa aadmi!*

*Check this out, man!  Iskee chaanbeen karo, aadmi!*

*Don't mess with me, dude. - Mere saath gandagi mat karo, e vyakti.*

*She's so fine! - Who itnee baareek hai!

Listen buddy, that chick's mine, okay!? - Suno dost, who chooza mera
hai, theek?
*

*Hey good looking; what's cooking?  Arrey sundarta ki devi; kya pakaa
rahee ho?*

*Are you nuts? - Kya aap akhrot hain?*

*Son of a gun. - Bachcha bandook ka.*

*Rock the party.  Party mein patthar feko. *

*And the best ones are.*

*How do you do? - Kaise karte ho?*

*Keep in touch! - Chhoote Raho.*

*Lets hang out! - Chalo bahar latakte
*
*hain



**

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<>

g_b My Coming-out Experience

[RAK SHAS]

Hi Guys,

After much thought and deliberations, I write this piece about my "coming-out" 
to my family as a Gay person. I share my own experience with you all in a hope 
that it will help someone else in future, as countless others have helped me on 
this journey of mine. Having known that I was Gay, it never occured to me to be 
otherwise.It was easier for me to accept myself as I am. The next big issue for 
me was to come out to my immediate family.

...and so it happened in December 2003. My sister had called to enquire about 
my marriage plans or ask if I had someone in mind – someone I would like to 
marry. After much insisting, I had to tell her the truth since she, along with 
my cousins, had been planning my wedding for long! And to tell her I am Gay, 
was the most difficult thing to do because my sister and I share a very 
wonderful close-knit relationship. We had no secrets between us and were always 
there for each other. I had kept a secret from her, and hence when it was all 
out she was shocked because I hid such an important fact from her. She being a 
strong person, appeared calm on the outside and said to me that she was OK with 
whoever I am. It was later when my bro-in-law told me that I came to know that 
she took it pretty badly and it was hard for her to accept the fact that I was 
Gay. Eventually through a series of talks and sharing with me about being gay 
and the constant and unwavering
 support of my bro-in-law, she today has accepted me for what I am. In this 
whole episode my bro-in-law who is the most practical, balanced, cool, and 
rational man I ever came across also came to know about me being Gay and was a 
pillar of support for me and my sis. He stood strong as a friend to me and as 
an integral part to our family. He was like a rock amidst the storm of 
coming-out to my sis.

Life took its turns and I ended up in Mumbai in 2005. My first ever GB parents 
meet was in 2006. The event was an eye-opener. For the first time I saw Indian 
parents who were supportive of their children and some were more forward and 
forthcoming in the battle of acceptance. This made me think whether I would be 
lucky enough with my parents accepting me as I am. Ever-since I came to terms 
with my sexuality I have had countless sleepless nights, nightmares, and 
absolute-dark-future-ahead-of-me kind of thoughts when it came to the idea of 
being open to my parents. Not only was I worried about if they would accept me, 
but also was afraid of their emotions being crushed and they getting 
disappointed in me. My parents' plight and the reactions of my family, my 
relatives and the society, while answering questions regarding my marriage was 
the constant thought running in my head! All this kept me awake through 
countless nights for a long time. Not to mention
 the burden and the tension of leading a double life, one for my parents and 
the society and one for myself within the confines of my heart and mind, took a 
toll on me. 
I always thought of having a partner in my life and to come out to my parents 
with him by my side so that my parents are assured that what I am saying is 
real and can be worked out in reality too. But fate had something else in mind. 
Incidentally I came out to my parents the very next day I broke up with my 
partner for 20 months, in March 2007. I know that it is not a long time to have 
been in a relationship but the time I spent in it was an eternity in itself for 
me to cherish. Well it so happened that my mom had given me a deadline to give 
her a final nod to get married which I had been evading for so long. So when I 
called up home that amazing Wednesday night after returning from office, my mom 
asked what my answer was to getting married. I said "Mom I don't want to get 
married to a girl because I don't like girls in that way or any way." to which 
she said "What do u mean?". As my dad was also listening to us talking he piped 
in from behind and said
 that "is he wanting to say that he is a 'homosexual'?". I said, "Yes, that's 
what I am... I am Gay and like guys to connect with emotionally, mentally, and 
physically". The immediate concern and reaction of my parents to my disclosure 
was that it is not natural and is this possible? Then I explained to them that 
it is as natural to me liking guys as it is natural for them to like each 
other. I also told them that "Being Gay is not something which was due to their 
lack of care or me or because of some kind of disease to be treated by a 
doctor, nor is it a mental aberration which can be fixed by a psychiatrist. It 
is as natural as someone having blond hair or as natural as a leaf to have 
green color". My Dad said that everyone needs a partner in life if not for fun 
but for old age and suggested to find a girl for me who will not want any 
physical relations but shall just be a companion. But as he said the above, on 
immediate retrospect he added that even
 he wouldn't have agreed to such a proposal for

g_b Mera husband Gay hai - India TV feature

[Manoj]

Yesterday there was a brief shown on India TV titled as above.
  As always it was sensationalised.  About a girl who was told on the night of 
her wedding by her husband that he was gay. It showed the footing of their 
wedding and of the husband and his bf (with usual India TV type comments).
  Interviews followed of both the sides  with allegations and counter 
allegations.
   
  It seemed sad that the guy and any "discreet" nature of his affair and 
sexuality has been blown off in full national media - what it will do to him 
and his personal life is anyone's guess. And it did seem wrong at first that 
the media has crossed some boundaries and thrown a persons private life open to 
public glare and a trauma that will surely haunt him --- and more so his entire 
family (who knew before his marriage that he was gay and had a bf).
   
  But the closing remarks by Rajat Sharma were a surprise. For a channel known 
to take a hard stance and generally be homophobic, actually mentioned that what 
a person does in his personal life and what sexual preferences he has are a 
matter of private life which are each persons concern only - BUT people gays 
should not marry girls and thus spoil lives of those who have come with hopes 
and expectations of a new and happy life with a life partner and thus break 
faiths and hearts.

  Was the treatment and the showcasing of the pictures of the 2 gays right 
along with their names, etc right or a violation of private space is an 
individual opinion (though i will not lose sleep over the fate that befalls 
them - as you sow so shall you reap).
  I only hope that those who are out at home  or even if not out  -- their 
parents did watch and think twice before forcing their kids into a wedlock for 
"society" sake.
   
  Manoj
   

 Send instant messages to your online friends http://uk.messenger.yahoo.com 

g_b Singapore sends mixed signals on homosexuality - Feature

[gay_bombay moderator]

Singapore sends mixed signals on homosexuality - Feature
*Posted :*Thu, 04 Oct 2007 05:07:00 GMT
**Home  *
 Singapore - Leaders of economically vibrant Singapore are sending mixed
signals on homosexuality in the competition with other Asian countries for
more foreign talent. While allowing a small number of gay bars, restaurants
and saunas to thrive, homosexual acts are still outlawed and carry a prison
term of up to two years. Even such frivolities as gay picnics with
participants clad in pink are prohibited.

"The government's stand is full of absurdities," said Alex Au, the
54-year-old founder of the gay rights group People Like Us. "Changes are
coming slowly, but the pace is frustrating."

"Singapore takes one step forward, one step backwards and one step
sideways," Au added.

The message sent to homosexuals abroad by recent events would not encourage
gays to relocate to the Singapore state, said activist Charles Tan,
referring to those who are used to being openly gay.

"Life for local gays is not really life when disclosure often results in
ostracism by families, isolation at school and little chance of a job," said
30-year-old Tan.

An onslaught of contradictions emerged during the recent third annual gay
pride festival.

Licenses were denied for an exhibition scheduled to show 80 photographs of
same-sex people kissing and the reading of a story about a young man's
fantasies of sex with older men, including government and military
officials. Discussions led by foreigners were also ruled out, along with the
picnic and a gay run.

In rejecting the display of photographs, the Media Development Authority
said that homosexual-themed content was permissible in an "appropriate
context," but should not be of a "promotional or exploitative nature."

Brief same-sex kissing has been allowed in plays and movies restricted to
those 21 or over, the regulator said. The exhibition was deemed as promoting
"a homosexual lifestyle" and not allowed.

In banning the picnic and run, police said they were "contrary to public
interest" in the highly conservative city-state of 5.6 million people who
are predominantly Chinese. Muslim Malays make up 14 per cent and Indians 7
per cent, with the remainder a variety of ethnic groups.

Other Asian countries which were former British colonies with laws regarding
homosexual sex as a crime include India, Sri Lanka, Malaysia, Bangladesh and
Pakistan.

Hong Kong, a strong economic rival, decriminalized gay sex in 1991.

The latest constitution in Thailand, another competitor, grants equal rights
for homosexuals.

The government announced plans last year to decriminalize heterosexual oral
and anal sex between consenting men and women, but kept the ban on
homosexual sex, infuriating the gay community.

While seldom enforced, activist Tan said that the statute alone is enough to
keep gay foreigners away, regardless of their talents. Singapore is eager to
become a cultural hub.

Au said he still regarded the festival as a success since far more events
were allowed than rejected. Other forums and readings went on without
interference. Even a sculpture of a man's genitals shaped from vegetables
was left untouched.

"We would never have been able to hold such a series of activities ten years
ago, Au said, adding he is hopeful of more easing of restrictions in the
long-term.

Estimates of the number of homosexuals range from 6 to 8 per cent of the
population to as many as 400,000.

"When gays from overseas regard Singapore, they figure it`s their money that
is wanted, primarily through tourism," Au noted.

The government acknowledges gays serve in the civil service. Some
advertisements for apartments are subtly aimed at homosexual and liberal
heterosexual lifestyles.

Lee Kuan Yew, Singapore's founding father who currently holds the post of
minister mentor in the administration of his son, Prime Minister Lee Hsien
Loong, said in April that homosexuality is genetic.

"We should not go around like this moral police, barging into people's
bedrooms. That's not our business," he said.

He subsequently said the law would have to be changed eventually to keep in
step with the rest of the world, a statement some seized on as an indication
that the government might move towards more liberalization.

"The government makes small gestures," said Au, referring to Lee Kuan Yew's
comments and those by former Prime Minister Goh Chok Tong that homosexuals
"are like you and me" and should not face discrimination.

"What isn't understood is how important gay identity is to gay people," Au
said.

Actor Ian McKellen, in Singapore in July performing in William Shakespeare's
King Lear, spoke out far more strongly than local gays dare.

"It's about time Singapore grew up, I think, and realized that gay people
are here to stay," said the British star, who was in Lord of the Rings.

"Just treat us with respect like we treat everybody else and the world will
be a better place

-- 
ww