Re: [Gen-art] For Dan Romascanu, Genart Last Call review by 2023-11-21 assigned: draft-ietf-gnap-core-protocol

[Dan Romascanu]

Hi Jean,

I have pushed the Accept button, but there is no chance that I can stand by
the 11/21 deadline. It's already 11/17 in my time zone, and even if I do
nothing but Gen-ART reviewing, there is no chance I can read, understand
and meaningfully comment on a 200+ pages document defining a new protocol.
I will need at least one extra week, probably more.

If any of the Gen-ART colleagues believes that they can do better, please
step in.

Regards,

Dan


On Thu, Nov 16, 2023 at 11:47 PM Jean Mahoney via Datatracker <
nore...@ietf.org> wrote:

>
> Last Call review of: draft-ietf-gnap-core-protocol (no specific version)
> Deadline: 2023-11-21
> Pages: 225
> Requested by: (System)
>
>
> https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-gnap-core-protocol/reviewrequest/18421/login/
>
> Jean Mahoney has assigned Dan Romascanu as a reviewer for this document.
>
>
>
>
>
>
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[Gen-art] Review Assignments

[Jean Mahoney via Datatracker]

Hi all,

The following reviewers have assignments:

For telechat 2023-11-30

Reviewer   Type  LC end Draft
Matt Joras Last Call 2023-11-01 draft-ietf-ippm-stamp-on-lag-05
Suhas Nandakumar   Last Call 2023-10-05 draft-ietf-bier-evpn-10
Lucas Pardue   Last Call 2023-11-02 
draft-ietf-tsvwg-rfc6040update-shim-20

Last calls:

Reviewer   Type  LC end Draft
Linda Dunbar   Last Call 2023-11-19 draft-ietf-openpgp-crypto-refresh-12
Roni Even  Last Call None   draft-ietf-scim-cursor-pagination-02
Matt Joras Last Call 2023-11-21 draft-ietf-avtcore-rtp-evc-06
Suhas Nandakumar   Last Call None   draft-ietf-rtgwg-qos-model-11
Pete Resnick   Last Call 2023-07-07 draft-ietf-ntp-update-registries-08
Ines RoblesLast Call 2023-11-27 draft-ietf-mpls-sfl-control-04
Dan Romascanu  Last Call 2023-11-21 draft-ietf-gnap-core-protocol-16
Meral Shirazipour  Last Call 2023-11-18 draft-ietf-nvo3-encap-10

Early review requests:

Reviewer   DueDraft
Elwyn Davies   2023-06-09 draft-ietf-drip-registries-13
Pete Resnick   2023-11-17 
draft-ietf-bess-evpn-per-mcast-flow-df-election-09

Next in the reviewer rotation:

  Thomas Fossati
  Gyan Mishra
  Vijay Gurbani
  Pete Resnick
  Russ Housley
  Elwyn Davies
  Mallory Knodel
  Christer Holmberg
  Reese Enghardt
  Matt Joras

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[Gen-art] Genart last call review of draft-ietf-ccamp-layer1-types-16

[Dale Worley via Datatracker]

Reviewer: Dale Worley
Review result: Ready with Nits

I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area
Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed
by the IESG for the IETF Chair.  Please treat these comments just
like any other last call comments.

For more information, please see the FAQ at

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Document:  draft-ietf-ccamp-layer1-types-16
Reviewer:  Dale R. Worley
Review Date:  2023-11-16
IETF LC End Date:  2023-11-21
IESG Telechat date:  [not known]

Summary:

This draft is basically ready for publication, but has nits that
should be fixed before publication.

I recommend the Yang Doctors check the Yang module again.  The last
Yang Doctor check was done on the -04 version, this is the -16
version, and the Yang has changed considerably since then.

Nits/editorial comments:

Different parts of the text disagree on whether (1) this module is
applicable to all layer 1 networks, but is primarily expected to be
used for OTN layer 1 networks, or (2) is applicable to OTN layer
networks.  E.g. the two sentences of the Abstract seem to take
opposite approaches, sec. 4.1 seems to be OTN-specific.  Presumably
the intention is agreed upon; the text needs to be made consistent
with the intention.

   3.  Prefix in Data Node Names

  +-+---+--+
  | Prefix  | YANG module   | Reference|
  +-+---+--+
  | l1-types| ietf-layer1-types | This Document|
  +-+---+--+
 Table 1: Prefixes and Corresponding YANG Modules


   RFC Editor Note: Please replace  with the number assigned to the
   RFC once this draft becomes an RFC.

Should "This Document" be replaced by "RFC "?

   6.  YANG Code for Layer1 Types

 identity ODU0 {
   base odu-type;
   description
 "ODU0 type (1.24Gb/s).";

For "description" values that are not full sentences, there is
inconsistency whether the value ends with a period or not.  There is
also inconsistency in values that are full sentences.  (Perhaps this
is a matter for the Editor.)

   Appendix A.  Examples of OTN Label Ranges

There are several instances of

 "//not-present tsg": "",

I suspect they are intended to be

 "// not-present tsg": "",

[END]



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[Gen-art] Genart early review of draft-ietf-bess-evpn-unequal-lb-18

[Mallory Knodel via Datatracker]

Reviewer: Mallory Knodel
Review result: Ready with Issues

I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. Please resolve these
comments along with any other comments you may receive.

For more information, please see the FAQ at
.

Document: draft-ietf-bess-evpn-unequal-lb
Reviewer: Mallory Knodel
Review Date: 16 Nov 2023

Summary: This draft is basically ready for publication, but has nits that
should be fixed before publication.

Major issues: Section 3 as the Solution Overview seems out of step with the
remaining sections in that it properly describes the relationships between 4, 5
and 6, but it appears that 7-10 are additional over arching considerations that
might benefit from being extracted from the discussion of direct solutions.
Suggesting perhaps that 4, 5 and 6 be treated under the solution space, whereas
the remaining substantive sections 7-10 be presented as additional
considerations and tradeoffs but not direct descriptions of full solutions to
the problems outlined in the introduction.

Minor issues: Not all acronyms are properly expanded in order of their
first-time use which hinders readability. Seems 12. Operational Considerations
is superfluous and plenty of document dependencies also do not have this
section.

Nits/editorial comments: The focus of my review did not expose any
nits/editorial comments though I believe there are some that have persisted
across the various versions that I compared and I would encourage the authors
to do a full copy edit ahead of IESG submission.


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[Gen-art] Gen-ART Last Call review of draft-ietf-detnet-pof-06

[Paul Kyzivat]

I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area
Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed
by the IESG for the IETF Chair.  Please treat these comments just
like any other last call comments.

For more information, please see the FAQ at

.

Document: draft-ietf-detnet-pof-06
Reviewer: Paul Kyzivat
Review Date: 2023-11-16
IETF LC End Date: 2023-11-22
IESG Telechat date: ?

Summary:

This draft is ready for publication as an Informational RFC.

Issues: None

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