By Shamika Andrade shamikaandr...@gmail.com Death never comes at the right time, despite what mortals believe. Death always comes like a thief. --Christopher Pike
I was four years old when I saw death up close for the first time. My dad's youngest sister lay in the coffin. She died due to a heart defect. "She lived a long full life," they said, "in spite of her health condition." I don't remember that day. All I remember is mum sent me to the toy store with my big brother. It was her attempt to shield her youngest from the harsh realities of life... that the moment we are born, we move towards our end. Like products on a store shelf, we all have our expiry date. I've been to many more funerals after my aunt's. And I fare really badly. At least I used to. I would sob real loud, even if I didn't know that person. And then the sobs would grow louder as I'd imagine anyone and everyone close to me in place of the actual dead person in the coffin. And then I'd think of the family members and how they would manage with such a loss. And then finally, I'd imagine myself in the coffin and think, "Oh God, you can't take me away. Not so soon! For I have so much to learn, so much to see, so much to do...." At this point, people around me would think that I shared a very close relationship with the deceased person. But now older and hopefully wiser, I've come to terms with death. Life will move on and it always does. And even after all the years, the heart will always reminisce. It's good, it should. Today being All Soul's Day, I can’t help but think of my loved ones. Aunty Aggy, Sr. Plassy, Fr Romu, Maimai, Papai and Pontimai. No trip of mine to Goa is ever complete until I visit their graves and niches with flower garlands. And no, I'm not sad that they are no more. Who says they are no more? I believe people we love never depart. For they live through us; through our thoughts, words and actions. I live my life taking careful decisions knowing that I always want my ancestors to be proud. Having said that, I still have no answer about why God takes away people in their prime. My Tamil friend's in laws are really grieving at the loss of their youngest son. "Why us, why him?" they asked me, "He was such a good boy, so loving." I had no answer. But I made up my mind to ask God when it's my end. And what about the people who are still with us on earth? I realize that no one knows what tomorrow holds. No one even knows how long we or our loved ones will live. So what if we lived each day like it was our last? If we did, it would ensure we seize every opportunity, push ourselves over the limit (we define our limits), and always remain too big to get stuck in pettiness. Unforgiveness, unhappiness and anything negative would never exist. As Christians, we believe in eternal life. Let's live a life accordingly. Let's celebrate life as much as we celebrate death. And especially today pray for my departed loved ones as I pray for yours. Until my next, Viva Goa! Yours truly, Goa Girl [Goanet Reader is compiled and edited by Frederick Noronha]