[lace-chat] Sex after surgery

2014-01-29 Thread Jean Nathan
In recent 
article in the Kentucky Post reported that a woman, one Anne
Maynard, has 
sued St Luke's hospital, saying that after her husband had
surgery there, he 
lost all interest in sex.

A hospital spokesman replied ... Mr. 
Maynard was admitted in
Ophthalmology - all we did was correct his 
eyesight.

Jean Nathan in Poole, Dorset, UK

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[lace-chat] At the surgery

2005-09-07 Thread Laceandbits
They ask at the doctor's office why you are there and you have to say in
front of others what's wrong and sometimes it's embarrassing.   There's
nothing
worse than a Doctor's Receptionist who insists you tell her what is wrong with
you in a room full of other patients. I know most of us have experienced this,
and I love the way this old guy handled it.


An 86-year-old man walked into a crowded Doctor's Waiting Room.  As he
approached the desk, the Receptionist said, Yes sir, what are you seeing the
Doctor
for today?
There's something wrong with my dick, he replied.
The Receptionist became irritated and said, You shouldn't come into acrowded
Doctor's Room and say things like that.
Why not? You asked me what was wrong and I told you, he said.
The Receptionist replied, You've obviously caused some embarrassment in this
room full of people. You should have said there is something wrong with your
ear or something and then discussed the problem further with the Doctor in
private.
The man replied, You shouldn't ask people things in a room full of others,
if the answer might embarrass anyone.

The man walked out, waited several minutes and then re-entered.
The Receptionist smiled smugly and asked, Yes?
There's something wrong with my ear, he stated.
The Receptionist nodded approvingly and smiled, knowing he had taken her
advice.
And what is wrong with your ear, Sir?
I can't pee out of it, the man replied.
The Waiting Room erupted in laughter.

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[lace-chat] Helen's Foot Surgery

2004-03-08 Thread W N Lafferty
Helen emailed me a few hours before she went into surgery,
and I sent her back the following and thought I'd like to share
with you all:

From My Hospital Bed:

The weather is warming to springtime
The sky is a beautiful blue
It's perfect outside to sit lacing
With coffee and biscuits to chew.

But I'm stuck inside in a prison
Surrounded by white coated guards
My tummy is rumbling, my heads in a daze
And lace making is not on the cards

And this time tomorrow I'm thinking
I'll still be stuck here in my bed
But at least the big deal will be over
And much better days are ahead!

Noelene in Cooma
[EMAIL PROTECTED]
http://members.ozemail.com.au/~nlafferty/

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