Re: Amusing logic

2010-05-10 Thread Paul Sprangers

 **My apologies to one and all.**

Well, I enjoyed it quite a bit more than the usual leaking memories and
overlapping text frames. Thank you.

Kind regards,
Paul Sprangers




Amusing logic

2010-05-09 Thread Dave Symes
Hi Alan,
The below pasted in was sent to me over the weekend, and while it is not
hahahahah, is is amusing logic.

Dave


The following is a bonus question given on a University of 
Arizona chemistry mid-term, and an actual answer turned in by a student. 
The answer by one student was so 'profound' that the professor shared it 
with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have 
the pleasure of enjoying it as well:


Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic 
(absorbs heat)? Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using 
Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) 
or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we 
need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate 
at which they are leaving, which is unlikely. I think that we can safely 
assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no 
souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look 
at the different religions that exist in the world today.
Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their 
religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these 
religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we 
can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as 
they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase 
exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell 
because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and 
pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand 
proportionately as souls are added. This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls 
enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase 
until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in 
Hell, so then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes 
over.
So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year 
that, 'It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,' and take 
into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two 
must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already 
frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen 
over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is 
therefore, extinctleaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence 
of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting 
'Oh my God.'

-- 

Dave Triffid



Re: Amusing logic

2010-05-09 Thread Philco



On 09/05/2010 19:42, Dave Symes wrote:

Hi Alan,
The below pasted in was sent to me over the weekend, and while it is not
hahahahah, is is amusing logic.

Dave


The following is a bonus question given on a University of
Arizona chemistry mid-term, and an actual answer turned in by a student.
The answer by one student was so 'profound' that the professor shared it
with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have
the pleasure of enjoying it as well:


Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic
(absorbs heat)? Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using
Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed)
or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we
need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate
at which they are leaving, which is unlikely. I think that we can safely
assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no
souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look
at the different religions that exist in the world today.
Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their
religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these
religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we
can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as
they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase
exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell
because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and
pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand
proportionately as souls are added. This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls
enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase
until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in
Hell, so then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes
over.
So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year
that, 'It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,' and take
into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two
must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already
frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen
over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is
therefore, extinctleaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence
of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting
'Oh my God.'

   


To which I have sometimes pondered, to know this, means you've been to 
hell and back and are one of those that got away.

Or was Teresa an angel (gender obscure).

Mmm



Re: Amusing logic

2010-05-09 Thread Tim Hill

[huge snip of QUOTED mis-posting}


You didn't mean to post this here did you?

Please don't reply to this!