Mayberry's Dumbest Crooks

[Ken Anderson]

I would like to nominate the following for being Mayberry's Most Stupid
Crook. Please vote for your choice and feel free to nominate others for
this prestigious recognition.

1. The Bookie Barber.  The dumbbell set up his bookie operation in Floyd's
Barbershop which was right next door to the Sheriff's Office.  He has his
friends show up every day carrying suspicious black bags.  Then he and his
partners exchange money right in front of a large window in the middle of
the day when anyone could see them.

2. The Counterfieters.  These two dumbbells set up shop right on Main
Street and then they hire the sheriff's aunt to work for them.  They only
have one printing device.  Plates for counterfeit money.  Why they would
hire a receptionist when they have nothing for her to do is just plain
dumb.  They could have printed their money in any old abandoned shack.

3. The Movie Company Bank Robbers.  Why on earth they went through that
entire charade of being a movie company was just plain dumb.  They had no
trouble getting into the bank at night, so they did not need any help at
all.  All they would have had to do was sneak into town at night and
break-in.  Why risk everything by getting the sheriff and his deputy
involved.

4. The Phoney FBI Caper.  Again, why go through that huge charade of being
with the FBI and putting on a phony ceremony where the mayor, the sheriff,
the deputy, and the entire town is involved. If the safe was so easy to
crack, why not just sneak back into town some night and open it.  Dumb Dumb
Dumb.
Ken "Barney" Anderson
The Mayberry Guru
2906 May Street
Eau Claire, Wisconsin 54701
www.themayberryguru.com
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Mayberry's dumbest crooks

[Dixonhayes]

My vote for dumbest criminals were the four guys who escaped from the  
county jail.  They thought they were so smart--hatching a plan to escape,  
taking advantage of the dumb, hick deputies, getting more smug as they 
thought  they were being proven right...only to mistake falling Christmas 
lights 
for  machine gun fire.  I'd like to think the Mayberry Gazette had a field 
day  with that story, a wire service picked it up, and the four men's names 
were  splashed coast to coast as four men who were done in by Christmas 
lights.   I would like to think Jack Paar even made a monologue joke about it 
on 
his show  that week.
 
Dixon
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