hahahahaaa judy ----- Original Message ----- From: "Christian Jegen" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> To: "Jack Eisenberg" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> Sent: Wednesday, April 12, 2006 2:12 PM Subject: Capitalism and Cows
> Capitalism and Cows > > > > TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM -- You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. > Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on > the income. > > AN AMERICAN CORPORATION -- You have two cows. You sell one, and force the > other to produce the milk of four cows. You are surprised when the cow > drops dead. > > FRENCH CORPORATION -- You have two cows. You go on strike because you want > three cows. > > A JAPANESE CORPORATION -- You have two cows. You redesign them so they are > one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. > You then create clever cow cartoon images called Cowkimon(tm) and market > them world-wide. > > A GERMAN CORPORATION -- You have two cows. You re-engineer them so they > live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves. > > A BRITISH CORPORATION -- You have two cows. Both are mad. > > AN ITALIAN CORPORATION -- You have two cows, but you don't know where they > are. You break for lunch. > > A RUSSIAN CORPORATION -- You have two cows. You count them and learn you > have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count > them again and learn you have 12 cows. You stop counting cows and open > another bottle of vodka. > > A LUXEMBOURG CORPORATION -- You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to > you. You charge others for storing them. > > A HINDU CORPORATION -- You have two cows. You worship them. > > A CHINESE CORPORATION -- You have two cows. You have 300 people milking > them. You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the > newsman who reported the numbers. > > AN ARKANSAS CORPORATION -- You have two cows. That one on the left is kinda > cute. > > ENRON CORPORATION -- You have two cows. You sell three of them to your > publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your > brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an > associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax > exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are transferred > via an intermediary to a Cayman Island company secretly owned by the > majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your > listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an > option on one more. Sell one cow to buy a new president of the United > States, leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the > release. The public buys your bull. > > ARTHUR ANDERSON, LLC -- You have 2 cows. You shred all documents that Enron > has any cows, take 2 cows from Enron for payment for consulting the cows, > and attest that Enron has 9 cows. > > > _______________________________________________ Chat mailing list Chat@charlesvillage.info http://charlesvillage.info/mailman/listinfo/chat_charlesvillage.info
