-Caveat Lector- >From SalonMagazine.CoM Impeachment diary III In the absence of real action, Senate insiders give the House Boyz low grades, rue the end of bipartisan cooperation and spread a whole lotta rumors about Trent Lott. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - During the impeachment trial, Salon is publishing occasional entries in this impeachment diary by a senior aide to a U.S. senator who must remain anonymous. BY ANONYMOUS Thursday, Jan. 14 8:30 a.m. Let's get ready to rumble! I arrive at work. You can feel the excitement, the nervousness, the electricity. Even the janitorial staff, busy clearing ice from the walkways, talks of nothing else. There is a sense of relief that the start is finally here. We all just want this thing over. The phones are already ringing off the hook. I smile at the front desk folks, all freshly minted college grads who came to Washington to change the world and were promptly handed a headset and a message pad. It beats working at McDonald's. Barely. By 9 a.m. they've had over 80 calls. I ask for a percentage for and against impeachment. "One hundred percent angry," is their response. Yeah, me too. 11 a.m. My boss meets with the third consecutive group of people from our state, who can talk about nothing else but the trial. He smiles and tries to ask them about their concerns; they ask if he has met Monica Lewinsky. Suddenly Monica's much cooler than a United States senator. From pariah to pop star in just a few weeks. 11:30 a.m. Get a call from the head of a major constituency group who hates my boss. His group has spent tens of thousands of dollars against him in the past, calling him a liar, a zealot and other nasty shots. He lectures me about his feelings on impeachment, as if I cared. I resist the temptation to tell him where to stick his opinion. Why do groups who spend their time and money screwing you believe that you care one iota what they think or do? Here's the insider advice to those backing political candidates: Don't guess wrong. And if you do, don't bother calling us. 1 p.m. Trial time. The atmosphere in the Capitol is electric as my boss and I get off the internal subway. Reporters are camped out downstairs screaming questions at him as we walk past. Photographers jump out to snap photos of any senator in sight. We are the Beatles. Staff wait with briefing memos to hand to their bosses as they whiz buy. Security is everywhere and only they are the same as ever: their usual cold, professional selves. It's prom night in the Senate chambers. They've gussied it up for the trial and it looks unusually beautiful. As they walked through the door, I noticed that none of the senators were smiling. Even those who support impeachment walked in, saw the pandemonium and realized that this game was for real: They were trapped inside this musty room until one side blinks. My boss asks me to ask his secretary for a better seat cushion. Each senator is given three tickets to hand out to constituents. The requests are numerous, and an informal "who's done what for us lately" merit system is used to distribute them. The kid we asked to handle the system quits after the first day, saying he was sick of getting yelled at. An aggressive, smart intern is next given this chore. She's a trouper; she hasn't even cried yet. 3 p.m. Senate staff phone one another with bipartisan gossip. Republicans and Democrats all agree: The House members look small, bitterly partisan and lost on the Senate stage, like high school boys playing "mock Congress" as part of an honors program. The House Boyz just don't understand the Senate. They came on too strong and too partisan. The Senate likes to mask its sharp-as-nails jabs with good-natured colloquialisms and smiles. The House Boyz were raised on "one-minute" House speech limits. Now, instead of using their skill of brevity, they wallowed in their freedom, realizing that the entire political world was watching them and they had 24 glorious hours in which to share their wisdom. Watching the trial, we quickly nickname it MNTV, for Mind-Numbing Television. Even Dan Rather went away early. Rep. James Sensenbrenner was so dull he put constitutional experts to sleep, drooling onto their tweedy jackets. And who was the unimaginative graphic artist who put together the graphs and charts that the House managers used? I've seen dental records that looked more appealing. 6 p.m. The Democrats are going nuts over the revelation that the House managers have begun contacting potential witnesses, despite the Gramm-Kennedy deal that left that question for another day. Surprise rang up from the press corps at this "violation" of last Friday's agreement. How could anyone be surprised? Despite the fact that they'd made no real agreement on witnesses, the Democrats trucked Tom Daschle out to do his "sermon on the mount" bit, noting that he hoped it wasn't a harbinger of things to come. I'm sure that's what the Japanese thought after Hiroshima. N E X T+P A G E+| Why are Republicans passing on dirt about Trent Lott? IMPEACHMENT DIARY III | PAGE 1, 2, 3 - - - - - - - - - - 9:30 p.m. An ice storm has hit D.C. and the sidewalks and roads are so slick that walking becomes a blood sport. We manage to slide over to the nearest bar to get thoroughly sloshed with a bipartisan contingent. The only conversation that excites people is the rumor that Larry Flynt has the dirt on Trent Lott. This rumor has been flying back and forth all day, among both Democrats and Republicans. I've heard many different renditions. Republicans spend time mulling over the theory that Don Nickles' backers are behind this rumor. Nickles has twice pondered a bid to become majority leader, but both times backed out to continue his role of second fiddle. By all accounts, the backup gig is getting old. For a variety of reasons, Nickles backers see this trial as their chance to get rid of dear old Trent. This Flynt rumor may just be another good way to keep Trent on the run. Or it may be true. Friday, Jan. 15 7 a.m. Got to get up early to watch the morning news shows. Both parties are singing familiar tunes: The Republicans think the opening arguments were fascinating, factual and thorough. The Democrats describe the same presentation as "half-baked, circumstantial, boring and inconclusive." 8:30 a.m. Democrats are still incensed that some Senate Republicans have met with House managers. How can the jurors consort with the prosecutors? We laugh. Democrats are saying this isn't a trial, it's a lynching, except that in this town, you need 66 votes to buy the rope. 10:30 a.m. Newest leak in the dam: Separate Democratic and Republican discussions with party attorneys from the House Judiciary Committee. Both sides say they were just "informational meetings" and not "strategy sessions." The camps are forming, as always, down party lines. It's worth noting that Clinton, the man who invented "The Third Way" -- a new, nonpartisan strategy to transcend ideology and get things done -- must now hope for a very partisan refusal to grant the conservative right his head. 12 noon We discuss what to say next week after Clinton's State of the Union. Clinton has decided -- after being asked not to by members of both parties -- to go ahead and give his State of the Union Tuesday night. It's a bipartisan "Screw you!" He's going to walk into the chambers of the House that just impeached him and proclaim his agenda for America. Of course, the State of the Union address last year is where he began his bounce back from the initial Lewinsky storm. In short, he's telling Congress: "You can't get rid of me, and here's what I am going to do to you while you try." 4:30 p.m. Tomorrow is the big Pollies presentation. Given each year by the National Association of Political Consultants, the Pollie awards are the Oscars of political campaigning. They're also like the purple hearts of political warfare. Invariably, the most negative attack ads and mail wins. They represent battle glory and can give you a big-time head start in the annual fight to sign clients for the next election cycle. It's fitting that as the generals of our parties are off playing the ultimate game of cutthroat, the loyal lieutenants gather in a bipartisan celebration of warfare. 5 p.m. Sen. Tom Harkin of Iowa stands up to object to Rep. Bob Barr's use of the word "juror." Sen. Judd Gregg of New Hampshire objects to Harkin's objection. The chief justice sides with Harkin, and Barr concludes his remarks. Lott adjourns us for the evening and asks us all to be back at 10 a.m. Saturday. All sides run out into the halls to give the world their wisdom. The spin is on, and on. N E X T+P A G E+| Anonymous' Senate trial picks and predictions. ANONYMOUS' SENATE TRIAL PICKS AND PREDICTIONS | PAGE 1, 2, 3 - - - - - - - - - - Picks and predictions: First senators to say, "Screw the bipartisan cooperation, let's rumble": Ted Kennedy, D-Mass., and Phil Gramm, R-Tex. Senator most likely to lose job after this trial: Sen. Trent Lott, R-Miss. Senators who are more worried about how they look than what they say: Chuck Robb, D-Va., and Connie Mack, R-Fla. Senators most hurt by "silent juror" role: Chuck Schumer, D-N.Y.; Paul Wellstone, D-Minn.; Rick Santorum, R-Penn. Happiest senator: Daniel Patrick Moynihan, D-N.Y., retiring. Saddest ex-senators: Al D'Amato and Bob Packwood Senator most likely to spend trial sucking up to Al Gore: Sen. Dianne Feinstein, D-Calif. First senator to say, "I told you I was right": Don Nickles, R-Okla. Senator most likely to vote to impeach President Andrew Johnson: Strom Thurmond, R-S.C. SALON | Jan. 15, 1999 ~~~~~~~~~~~~ A<>E<>R The only real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes. -Marcel Proust + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + Forwarded as information only; no endorsement to be presumed + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + In accordance with Title 17 U.S.C. section 107, this material is distributed without charge or profit to those who have expressed a prior interest in receiving this type of information for non-profit research and educational purposes only. DECLARATION & DISCLAIMER ========== CTRL is a discussion and informational exchange list. 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