-Caveat Lector-
From: Mary Jane Durrant [EMAIL PROTECTED]
5:51 PM
From a Georgia Preacher:
As I was making my daily journey to the Post Office the other day, I
patiently
waited for
a car to vacate a parking space near the door. As the rear of the vehicle
came
toward
me, I noticed a bumper sticker, which read, in big, bold letters, "THANK ME.
I
VOTED
CLINTON-GORE."
Pondering the message of the brave, stubborn soul in the car ahead of me, I
considered all the things I could be thankful for as a result of the
Clinton-Gore regime.
Indeed, I discovered the list was long and varied.
Thank you for reminding us that the government that gave us the Internal
Revenue
Service and welfare also lusts for control of the greatest healthcare system
in
the
world.
Thank you for reminding that the FBI, who has a file on millions of
Americans,
including
myself, can give those files to people powerful enough to demand them.
Thank you for giving us a President who supports partial-birth abortions.
Thank you for introducing us to Jennifer Flowers, Paula Jones, Monica
Lewinsky
and
about two dozen other names that we might not have met and known otherwise.
Thank you for allowing a WAR HERO and the author of one of the most
successful
military campaigns in history to leave the presidency because, no matter how
successful he was, in all our moral outrage, we just wouldn't tolerate
someone
who
would lie to the American people by promising "no new taxes" and then going
back
on
his word. We certainly can't have a liar in the White House, now can we?
Thank you for giving us a President who discusses his choice of underwear
with
teenagers. We always wondered if presidents wore boxers or briefs.
Thank you for installing a man who reminds us of those good old days of pot
smoking
(without inhaling, of course) and war PROTESTING.
Thank you for showing us that the ridiculous plot of the movie, "Wag the
Dog,"
could
really be plausible after all.
Thank you for showing all the men and women in America that sexual
harassment in
the workplace, and on the job, is okay as long as it involves powerful
middle-age
executives and young women half their age under their power. It is, after
all, a
"private
matter."
Thank you for revealing that the agenda of the National Organization of
Women
only
includes some women. Women like Anita Hill and not women like Paula Jones,
Monica
Lewinsky, et al.
Thank you for reintroducing the concept of "impeachment" to a new generation
that
missed the discussion surrounding it the last time it was brought up.
Thank you for curing me of my addiction to the evening news.
Thank you for reminding us that, when all is said and done, "CHARACTER"
really,
really
DOES matter.
And, in comparison to recent days:
Thank you for making Dan Quayle look like a Rhodes Scholar.
Thank you for making Jimmy Carter look competent.
Thank you for making Gerald Ford look graceful.
Thank you for making Richard Nixon look honest.
Thank you for making Lyndon Johnson look truthful.
Thank you for making John Kennedy look moral.
Thank you for making Al Gore look positively presidential.
Thank you for reminding us of the importance of term limits.
And really, thank you not once, but twice! Why, if not for YOU, instead of
the
current,
interesting discussion all over the television networks and newspapers, we
would
be
focused on a whole slew of trivial matters such as global defense, the
economy,
nukes
in North Korea, genocide in Africa, the containment of terrorism, and all
those
other
boring topics.
So, thank you, thank you, thank you! Oh, and if you voted for Ross Perot,
thank
you,
too. You deserve just as much of the credit as my friend with the bumper
sticker.
Since Bill Clinton took office, here are some of the "GOOD" things that have
happened:
*72 House and Senate witnesses have plead the fifth.
*17 witnesses have fled the country to avoid testifying.
*19 foreign witnesses have refused to be interviewed by US investigative
bodies.
*19 prosecutions from Whitewater investigations.
*14 convictions from Whitewater investigations.
*8 imprisonment's from Whitewater investigations.
*55 total charges in all Clinton scandals.
*32 total convictions (so far) in all Clinton scandals.
*14 total imprisonment's (so far) in all Clinton scandals.
*938 overnight stays at the White House for Clinton donors.
*$40 million-cost of Clinton's trip to China.
*62 House of Representative seats that have changed from Democrat to
Republican.
*12 Senate seats that have changed from Democrat to Republican.
*13 Governorships that have changed from Democrat to Republican
*1,200 state legislative seats that have changed from Democrat to Republican
*353 elected Democrats who have switched parties since Clinton took office.
Yes, it's been an interesting six years for "the most ethical administration
in
the history
of the Republic." But then ... everybody knows it's ALL the fault of the
"Vast
