If you plan to contribute to the thread, read no further because it will be impossible to top what follows (well, maybe possible but not likely...I'm having way too much fun with this). If not, then scroll down and enjoy, and thanks to all who came before. And please feel free to amend as you see fit...
A meditator walks backwards into a bar and sits down. Noticing some of the patrons staring at him, he says, "Duh, south-facing entrance." "What'll it be?" asks the bartender. Feeling magnanimous because he had just received his Settle stipend, he replies with a flourish of both arms, "A *round* of milk 'n' cookies for everyone!" "Hey, where daya think you are, Fairfield? Wait a minute, this *is* Fairfield. Coming right up. Organic, of course?" "Duh, is there any other kind?" While waiting for his order, he notices a large group of rather boisterous and disheveled IA participants gathered around a large round table covered with empty beer pitchers and overturned shot glasses. Noticing his stare, a member of the group, with fear in his eyes and a trembling voice, pleads, "You haven't seen us here, right?" "What's wrong with havin' a little fun and lettin' your hair down once in a while, huh?" "Nothing," replies Andrew Cohen. "It's not *where* they are, but *who* they're with." "To each his own, but remember, karma's a real bitch." Turning back to his order, he notices a lovely member of the opposite sex sitting all alone at the end of the bar. Moving closer, he asks, "Can I buy you a drink?" "Sure...Jose Cuervo. *Gold* of course." Feeling he might get lucky, he uses his *best* pick-up line. "Have we met in a past life?" "Not likely, I'm an avatar." Several yugas later, a meditator walks into a bar with an east-facing entrance, and happens to notice a large group of rather boisterous and disheveled dogs gathered around a large round table...
