Mirror, mirror on the wall Do you have to tell it all? Where do you get the glaring right To make my clothes look too darn tight? I think I'm fine but I can see You won't cooperate with me, The way you let the shadows play You'd think my hair was getting gray. What's that, you say? A double chin? No, that's the way the light comes in, If you persist in peering so You'll confiscate my facial glow, And then if you're not hanging straight You'll tell me next I'm gaining weight, I'm really quite upset with you For giving this distorted view; I hate you being smug and wise O, look what's happened to my thighs! I warn you now, O mirrored wall, Since we're not on speaking terms at all, If I look like this in my new jeans You'll find yourself in smithereens!!
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