Various important philosophical Questions

Why is it only drug dealers and software developers call their clients 'users'?

Does the Little Mermaid wear an algebra?

Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?

How is it possible to have a civil war?

If God dropped acid, would he see people?

If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest drown too?

If you ate pasta and antipasta, would you still be hungry?

If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?

Why are hemorrhoids called "hemorrhoids" instead of "assteroids"?

Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?

Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song?

Where are we going? And what's with this handbasket?

If the black box flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash, why isn't the 
whole airplane made out of the stuff?

Why is there an expiration date on sour cream?

If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?

I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help section?" She 
said, "If I tell you, it would defeat the purpose.

If all those psychics know the winning lottery numbers, why are they still working?

Should crematoriums give discounts for burn victims?

If a mute swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?

Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?

OK, so what's the speed of dark?






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