> > Hard to believe, but another year has passed. Once again, it's > time to name > the Darwin Award nominees and the winner of 2002. The Darwins > are awarded > every year to the persons who died (or almost died) in the > stupidest way. > These are named "Darwin Awards" because it is hoped that > "Survival of the > Fittest" means something. Hopefully these people haven't passed > along their > stupidity. > > This year's nominees are: > Nominee 1: [San Jose Mercury News]: An unidentified man, using a > shotgun > like a club to break a former girlfriend's wind shield, > accidentally shot > himself to death when the gun discharged, blowing a hole in his > gut. > > Nominee 2: [Kalamazoo Gazette]: James Burns, 34, (a mechanic) of > Alamo, > Michigan, was killed in March as he was trying to repair what > police > describe as a "farm type truck." Burns got a friend to drive the > truck on a > highway while Burns hung underneath so he could ascertain the > source of a > troubling noise. Burns' clothes caught > on something, however, and the other man found Burns "wrapped in > the drive > shaft." > > Nominee 3: [Hickory Daily Record]: Ken Charles Barger, 47, > accidentally > shot > himself to death in December in Newton, North Carolina. > Awakening to the > sound of a ringing telephone beside his bed, he reached for the > phone but > grabbed instead a Smith & Wesson 38 Special, which discharged > when he drew > it to his ear. > > Nominee 4: [UPI, Toronto]: Police said a lawyer, demonstrating > the safety > of > windows in a downtown Toronto skyscraper, crashed through a > pane with his > shoulder and plunged 24 floors to his death. A police spokesman > said Garry > Hoy, 39, fell into the courtyard of the Toronto Dominion Bank > Tower early > Friday evening as he was explaining the strength of the > building's windows > to visiting law students. Hoy previously has conducted > demonstrations of > window strength according to police reports. Peter Lawson, > managing partner > of the firm Holden Day Wilson, told the Toronto Sun newspaper > that Hoy was > "one of the best and brightest" members of the 200-man > association. > > Nominee 5: [Bloomberg News Service]: A terrible diet and a room > with no > ventilation are being blamed for the death of a man who was > killed by his > own gas. There was no mark on his body and an autopsy showed > large amounts > of methane gas in his system. His diet had consisted primarily > of beans and > cabbage (and a couple of other things). It was just the right > combination > of > foods. It appears that the man died in his sleep from breathing > the > poisonous cloud that was hanging over his bed. Had he been > outside or had > his windows been opened, it wouldn't have been fatal. But the > man was shut > up in his near-airtight bedroom. According to the article, "He > was a big > man > with a huge capacity for creating "this deadly gas." Three of > the rescuers > got sick and one was hospitalized. > > Nominee 6: [The News of the Weird]: Michael Anderson Godwin made > News of > the > Weird posthumously. He had spent several years awaiting South > Carolina's > electric chair on a murder conviction before having his sentence > reduced to > life in prison. While sitting on a metal toilet in his cell > attempting to > fix his small TV set, he bit into a wire and was electrocuted. > > Nominee 7: [The Indianapolis Star]: A cigarette lighter may have > triggered > a > fatal explosion in Dunkirk, Indiana. A Jay County man using a > cigarette > lighter to check the barrel of a muzzleloader was killed Monday > night when > the weapon discharged in his face, sheriff's investigators said. > Gregory > David Pryor, 19, died in his parents' rural Dunkirk home about > 11:30 p.m. > Investigators said Pryor was cleaning a 54-caliber muzzleloader > that had > not > been firing properly. He was using the lighter to look into the > barrel when > the gunpowder ignited. > > Nominee 8: [Reuters, Mississauga, Ontario]: A man cleaning a > birdfeeder on > the balcony of his condominium apartment in this Toronto suburb > slipped and > fell 23 stories to his death. Stefan Macko, 55, was standing on > a wheeled > chair when the accident occurred, said inspector D'Arcy Honer of > the Peel > Regional Police. "It appears the chair moved and he went over > the balcony," > Honer said. > > Finally, Nominee 9, The Winner!!!: [Arkansas Democrat Gazette]: > Two local men were injured when their pickup truck left the road > and struck > a tree near Cotton Patch on State Highway 38 early Monday. > Woodruff County > deputy Dovey Snyder reported the accident shortly after midnight > Monday. > Thurston Poole, 33, of Des Arc and Billy Ray Wallis, 38, of > Little Rock > were > returning to Des Arc after a frog gigging trip. On an overcast > Sunday > night, > Poole's pickup truck headlights malfunctioned. The two men > concluded that > the headlight fuse on the older model truck had burned out. As a > replacement > fuse was not available, Wallis noticed that the .22 caliber > bullet from his > pistol fit perfectly into the fuse box next to the steering > wheel column. > Upon inserting the bullet, the headlights again began to operate > properly > and the two men proceeded on eastbound toward the White River > Bridge. After > traveling approximately 20 miles and just before crossing the > river, the > bullet apparently overheated, discharged and struck Poole in the > right > testicle. The vehicle swerved sharply right, exiting the > pavement and > striking a tree. Poole suffered only minor cuts and abrasions > from the > accident, but will require surgery to repair the testicle. > Wallis sustained > a broken clavicle and was treated and released. "Thank God we > weren't on > that bridge when Thurston shot his balls off or we might both be > dead" > stated Wallis. "I've been a trooper for ten years in this part > of the > world, > but this is a first for me. I can't believe that those two would > admit how > this accident happened," said Snyder. Upon being notified of the > wreck, > Lavinia (Poole's wife) asked how many frogs the boys had caught > and did > anyone get them from the truck. > > =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= * send mails to [EMAIL PROTECTED] * PLEASE do not post offensive jokes * message size limit is 150 KB * List info and instructions are available at http://harbinger.sirma.bg/lists/jokes.html and in the header of this email =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
