Tiptoe A man staggered home after another late evening with his drinking buddies.
With shoes in his left hand to avoid waking his wife, he tiptoed as quietly as he could toward the stairs leading to their upstairs bedroom. But he misjudged the bottom step in the darkened entryway. As he grabbed the banister to catch himself, his body swung around and he landed heavily on his rump, which was made especially painful due to the now broken whiskey bottle he carried in each back pocket. Trying desperately to suppress a yelp, he sprung up, pulled down his pants, and examined his lacerated, bleeding cheeks in the mirror of a nearby hallway. He then managed to find a large, full box of Band-aids and proceeded to place a patch, as best he could, on each place he saw blood. After hiding the now almost empty Band-aid box, he was able to shuffle and stumble his way to bed. In the morning, the man awoke with a searing pain in his head and butt, and his wife staring at him from across the room. She said, "You were drunk again last night." Forcing himself to ignore his agony, he looked meekly at her and replied, "Now, hon, why would you say such a mean thing?" "Well," she said, "it could be the open front door... it could be the glass at the bottom of the stairs... it could be the drops of blood trailing through the house... it could be your bloodshot eyes. But, mostly, it's all those Band-aids stuck on the downstairs mirror." Jeanette Fischer, Western Cape, South Africa To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace-chat [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
