Dear Suamiku, Sahabat, Pacarku,
1. kalau kaya gitu dari tanggal 9 Juni s/d 9 Juli, kalian harus siap-siap kita tinggalkan, karena kita ngak punya waktu untuk nugrusin keperluan kalian, medingan kita ke salon atau jalan-jalan ke mall.
2. kalau mau makan atau minta sesuatu, silahkan ambil sendiri, dan kerjakan sendiri karena kita mau having fun sama teman-teman.
3. kalau tagihan kartu kredit melonjak karena kita pergi-pergi terus, harap dibayarkan, itu karena kompensasi kita-kita yang cari kesenangan di tempat lain, seperti mall, spa, resto dll.
4. kalau rumah berantakan, kotor dan bau, harap dirasain sendiri karena kita ngak mau buang-buang waktu untuk membereskan rumah pada saat kalian nonton piala dunia, mendingan arisan.
5. kalau kalian sakit kepala gara2 kurang tidur nonton piala dunia, jangan harap kita obatin, paling kita syukurin aja.
6. kalau body kita jadi oke karena mengikuti senam and diet untuk menghilangkan kejenuhan kalian nonton piala dunia, jangan komplein ya kalau cowo-cowo mupeng sama kita.
7. mohoooooooooooonnn banget......kalo kami kehilangan kesabaran melihat kalian marah2 atau merengek-rengek karena salah satu team yang kalian unggulan kalah...... "kalian ngak hanya saja menambah kekesalan kami...juga akan mengurangi cinta kami terhadap kalian ingat!!! itu akan menjadi pemicu utama perceraian!!!...
8. jangan mimpi dech kita akan duduk manis disamping kalian menemani kalian nonton bola, dan ingat!!! jangan pernah memaksa kita untuk melakukan itu!!! karena jika kalian melakukan itu imbasnya kalian tidak akan mendapat jatah bermesraan dengan ktia!!!.
9. jika tagihan listrik melonjak karena kalian nonton sepak bola tiap malam, maka itu akan dipotong dari jatah uang belanja, dan kalian tahu itu?? jangan harap kita masakin kalian makanan yang enak2.
10. dan terakhir..... jangan tunjukan raut muka ekspresi "sedih" karena selama piala dunia berlangsung kalian kita abaikan, sukur2 kita ngak lupa sama kalian, atau kecantol sama orang lain.
terima kasih...suamiku...temanku........pacarku.....untuk mengerti!!!!!!!!
WORLD CUP RULES
FOR: WIVES, PARTNERS & GIRLFRIENDS.
Dear Wife, Partner, Girlfriend,
1. From 9 June to 9 July 2006, you should read the sports section of the newspaper so that you are aware of what is going on regarding the World Cup, and that way you will be able to join in the conversations. If you fail to do this, then you will be looked at in a bad way, or you will be totally ignored. DO NOT complain about not receiving any attention.
2. During the World Cup, the television is mine, at all times, without any exceptions. If you even take a glimpse of the remote control, you will lose it
3. If you have to pass by in front of the TV during a game, I don't mind, as long as you do it crawling on the floor and without any distractions. If you decide to stand nude in front of the TV, make sure you put your clothes on right after because if you catch a cold, I won't have time to take you to the doctor or look after you during the World Cup month.
4. During the games I will be blind, deaf and mute, unless I require a refill of my drink or something to eat. You are out of your mind if you expect me to listen to you, open the door, answer the telephone, or pick up the baby that just fell on the floor....It won't happen.
5. It would be a good idea for you to keep at least 2 six packs in the fridge at all times, as well as plenty of things to nibble on, and please do not make any funny faces at my friends when they come over to watch the games. In return, you will be allowed to use the TV between 12am and 6am, unless they replay a good game that I missed during the day.
6. Please, please, please!! If you see me upset because one of my teams is losing, DO NOT say "get over it, itâ?Ts only a game", or "don't worry, they'll win next time". If you say these things, you will only make me more upset and I will love you less. Remember, you will never ever know more about football than me and your so called "words of encouragement" will only lead to a break up or divorce.
7. You are welcome to sit with me to watch one game and you can talk to me during halftime but only when the commercials are on, and only if the half time scores is pleasing me. In addition, please note I am saying "one"
game; hence do not use the World Cup as a nice cheesy excuse to "spend time together".
8. The replays of the goals are very important. I don't care if I have seen them or I haven't seen them, I want to see them again. Many times.
9. Tell your friends NOT to have any babies, or any other child related parties or gatherings that requires my attendance because:
a) I will not go,
b) I will not go, and
c) I will not go.
10. But, if a friend of mine invites us to his house on a Sunday to watch a game, we will be there in a flash.
11. The daily World Cup highlights show on TV every night is just as important as the games themselves. Do not even think about saying "but you have already seen this...why don't you change the channel to something we can all watch?" because, the reply will be, "Refer to Rule #2 of this list".
12. And finally, please save your expressions such as "Thank God the World Cup is only every 4 years". I am immune to these words, because after this comes the Champions League, Italian League, Spanish League, Premier League, FA Cup, etc.
Thank you for your cooperation
FOR: WIVES, PARTNERS & GIRLFRIENDS.
Dear Wife, Partner, Girlfriend,
1. From 9 June to 9 July 2006, you should read the sports section of the newspaper so that you are aware of what is going on regarding the World Cup, and that way you will be able to join in the conversations. If you fail to do this, then you will be looked at in a bad way, or you will be totally ignored. DO NOT complain about not receiving any attention.
2. During the World Cup, the television is mine, at all times, without any exceptions. If you even take a glimpse of the remote control, you will lose it
3. If you have to pass by in front of the TV during a game, I don't mind, as long as you do it crawling on the floor and without any distractions. If you decide to stand nude in front of the TV, make sure you put your clothes on right after because if you catch a cold, I won't have time to take you to the doctor or look after you during the World Cup month.
4. During the games I will be blind, deaf and mute, unless I require a refill of my drink or something to eat. You are out of your mind if you expect me to listen to you, open the door, answer the telephone, or pick up the baby that just fell on the floor....It won't happen.
5. It would be a good idea for you to keep at least 2 six packs in the fridge at all times, as well as plenty of things to nibble on, and please do not make any funny faces at my friends when they come over to watch the games. In return, you will be allowed to use the TV between 12am and 6am, unless they replay a good game that I missed during the day.
6. Please, please, please!! If you see me upset because one of my teams is losing, DO NOT say "get over it, itâ?Ts only a game", or "don't worry, they'll win next time". If you say these things, you will only make me more upset and I will love you less. Remember, you will never ever know more about football than me and your so called "words of encouragement" will only lead to a break up or divorce.
7. You are welcome to sit with me to watch one game and you can talk to me during halftime but only when the commercials are on, and only if the half time scores is pleasing me. In addition, please note I am saying "one"
game; hence do not use the World Cup as a nice cheesy excuse to "spend time together".
8. The replays of the goals are very important. I don't care if I have seen them or I haven't seen them, I want to see them again. Many times.
9. Tell your friends NOT to have any babies, or any other child related parties or gatherings that requires my attendance because:
a) I will not go,
b) I will not go, and
c) I will not go.
10. But, if a friend of mine invites us to his house on a Sunday to watch a game, we will be there in a flash.
11. The daily World Cup highlights show on TV every night is just as important as the games themselves. Do not even think about saying "but you have already seen this...why don't you change the channel to something we can all watch?" because, the reply will be, "Refer to Rule #2 of this list".
12. And finally, please save your expressions such as "Thank God the World Cup is only every 4 years". I am immune to these words, because after this comes the Champions League, Italian League, Spanish League, Premier League, FA Cup, etc.
Thank you for your cooperation
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