When I receive a response that I perceive as condescending or judgmental as to my reasons for wanting information, I tend to keep it offlist so as not to involve other people or starting a 'flame' which I have seen escalate to the extreme of profanities onlist. I do not view this as a lack of courage, rather as one of tact and not embarrassing one another. However, I have been invited to bring it to the list. I attempt to keep personal responses to 'wording' or 'perception' offlist. As simple as that. No need for the rest of the list to be disturbed by one person's sense of outrage or the other person's sense of self-righteousness. If this is not considered circumspect by the list-owner, let him/them/her speak now and request that any personal grievances be brought before the rest of the list rather than handled privately. Dennice
