Thanks for sharing this Udhay. I have been a little overwhelmed at how much
traction this small anecdote has had on different social media platforms. I
had really thought that this was going to be just one of those moments
where people who knew me would be as amazed as I was, at the violence which
erupted out of me and ended in physical assault. I have long since been an
ally and a feminist, and have always thought of myself as a pacifist. But
there is something here, the fermenting anger of the #Metoo movement and
the consistent outpouring of narratives of sexual abuse, that made me snap
in this particular instance.

I also don't think I was doing anything extraordinary here. But Radhika's
response (thank you for the support and the sharing -I flinch at the
thought of being so precarious that you cannot even sleep in public spaces
like flights or trains) has been echoed by many others, who thought that
this particular act of putting my body in risk to fight for somebody else
who was literally undergoing abuse under my eyes, was a feat worth
celebrating. It disheartens me that this is seen as an exception. To me,
very honestly, there was no other option. I might not have been slap-easy
if I had thought of it more, but that smile he gave me, of being an
accomplice, assured that because I was a man, and not related to the woman,
I would join in, in his actions and definitely not call him out - I think
that is what made me just snap.

There are many ways of being an ally. And there are many layers to think
through here - intersections of gender, race, sexuality, class, and
privilege have all been playing in my head. And I am going to spend quite
some time teasing them out, but in the meantime, I am happy to take a stand
and take physical action. I hope that this is only a snapshot of what any
other wo*man might have done - not necessarily slap, but definitely take a
stand and put an end to it.

I am processing both what happened and all the responses I am getting to
it, but for me, from my early days being trained in feminism, one thing is
clear - there is no feminism without action. Words, theories, academia, and
updates are all fine, but the proof of the pudding is always going to be in
practice. And as Sharmila Rege, one of my first mentors in this space had
taught very eloquently, in her work and her life - we need to break
ourselves on the very axis of power that empowers us, in order to take the
physical risks towards care-making. Everything else is window dressing.

Anyway, I am thinking out loud here, and probably rambling, but happy to
share some of what is going in my head beyond the stylised anecdotal
telling of that facebook post.

Warmly,
Nishant

On Wed, 14 Nov 2018 at 19:09 Radhika, Y. <[email protected]> wrote:

> Nishant! Kudos to you for the action and the account. Please excuse this
> risque interpretation but you just gave 'apna haath, jagannath' new meaning
> and perhaps gave that other not-so-gentlemanly person a lesson or two.
>
> I have been lucky so far in that regard...but I find myself unable to fall
> asleep on planes because I don't like being vulnerable in that way...and
> the brain seems to be wired, either by nature or by nature, to be scanning
> for danger.
>
> Radhika
>

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