Apologies for joining this discussion late.
I was sorry to see Simon go.
Mike said this was a common feature of replies with Simon, and so....he had
to go (something like that).
I trust it wasn't an off-day for Mike, when he made the decision, and Mike
made a timely decision in respect of this list. Of course, I hadn't seen
all Simon's posts.
I think Simon truly attempted to be straightforward and candid, and we
would not recognise him in real life, as he asked us to consider.
Yet, it's true to appear polite takes a lot of effort in this medium, in
order to guess what won't upset people. Perhaps it took Simon too long to
learn how. But, we all carry our own cross to bear, and that cross may be
our virtue too. Simon's is understandable, and should be tolerated, because
I think society needs that character amongst us, as if a calling.
Simon remained tough , because he wouldn't be worn down, and chose to
engage people. That is also a virtue, if you have the time and energy, or
are in such a phase.
The reason I say this, is because I spotted a comment below, which I
frequently see levelled at people, and which I really take exception to.
Mainly because it is a common excuse which always goes unchallenged, and
rather like kicking a corpse - and give the appearance of an in-group and
an out group - the sad people and the happy people.
No need to accuse me of being thin-skinned here:
--On 9 November 2007 14:09:30 -0500 Dianne France
<[email protected]> wrote:
Good parents never enjoy disciplining a child but it is necessary for
growth and setting boundaries. ....... Personally
I believe he is a very sad person inside.
I read such statements about sadness as either provocative (if not an
epitaph) or self-serving and censoring sadness as 'an unwanted kind of
mental illness' in our midst. Usually inaccurate too....like how on earth
did you measure their sadness, or its quality, and if you did, why doesn't
that make a difference?
The sad person inside to be condemned for being sad inside, as if it was
his own doing, or morally corrupt.
I'd like to remind folk that sadness is not a mental illness, but
extraordinary happiness is seen as rather like one (mal adaptive, unreal,
delusional). In fact, sadness is viewed in the professional's reasoned
world as an appropriate response to the world, and adaptive, not
mal-adaptive behaviour.
IN any case, I don't see Simon as angry or sad in any heavy way, but as I
said above...on a mission, and one which might be understood and tolerated
by *Good parents.
Common is deviation, and a need to categorise people into likes and
dislikes. Simon naturally sent invitations to those who needed to dislike
someone (thin-skinned), and took them on, often holding out olive branches
which were almost as often ignored. In many ways he was the selfless
parent, and risked being misunderstood. Bless him.
JOhn
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