On 30-Apr-2001 Heracles wrote:
> FOOT-AND-MOUTH BELIEVED TO BE FIRST VIRUS UNABLE TO SPREAD THROUGH
> MICROSOFT OUTLOOK
> Researchers Shocked to Finally Find Virus That E-mail App Doesn't Like
> Atlanta, Ga. (SatireWire.com) - Scientists at the
> Centers for Disease Control and Symantec's AntiVirus Research Center
> today confirmed that foot-and-mouth disease cannot be
> spread by Microsoft's Outlook email application, believed to be the
> first time the program has ever failed to propagate a major
> virus.
Ahha! Next time Outlook propagates a major virus, we can borrow a strategy to
contain the outbreak. Slaughter all affected PC software, including on PCs not
infected but on the same LAN segment, and all on neighbouring LAN segments as
well. Bury the carcasses in landfill where possible, otherwise (and it will
take time to organise landfill sites for the staggering volume of cases) douse
in fuel and burn. The world's press will report that the entire country is
awash with flaming pyres of infected and infectable software, which may bugger
the tourist trade in the short term, but it is the only way.
Later we can proceed to restock PCs with disease-free software.
--
Jim Hague - [EMAIL PROTECTED] (Work), [EMAIL PROTECTED] (Play)
Never trust a computer you can't lift or you don't control.
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