[Sndbox] Y'allbonics

[Charles]

Y'allbonics          The Association of Southern Schools has decided to pursue some of the        seemingly endless taxpayer dollar pipeline through Washington, designating        Southern slang, or Y'allbonics, as a language to be taught in Southern        schools. The following are excerpts from the Y'allbonics/English        dictionary.           1.) HEIDI - (noun) -Greeting.           2.) HIRE YEW - Complete sentence. Remainder of greeting.         Usage: "Heidi, Hire yew?"           3.) BARD - (verb) - Past tense of the infinitive "to borrow."         Usage: "My brother bard my pickup truck."           4.) JAWJUH - (noun) - The state north of Florida. Capitol is Lanner.         Usage: "My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck and took it         to Lanner."           5.) BAMMER - (noun) - The state west of Jawjuh. Capitol is Berminhayam.         Usage: "A tornader jes went through Bammer an' left $20,000,000         in improvements."           6.) MUNTS - (noun) - A calendar division.         Usage: "My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck, and ain't herd from him in munts."           7.) THANK - (verb) - Cognitive process.         Usage: "Ah thank ah'll have a bare."           8.) BARE - (noun) - An alcoholic beverage made of barley, hops, and yeast.         Usage: "Ah thank ah'll have a bare."           9.) IGNERT - (adjective) - Not smart. See "Arkansas native."         Usage: "Them bammer boys sure are ignert!"           10.) RANCH - (noun)- tool used for tight'nin' bolts.         Usage: "I thank I left my ranch in the back of that pickup         truck my brother from Jawjuh bard a few munts ago."           11.) ALL - (noun) - A petroleum-based lubricant.         Usage: "I sure hope my brother from Jawjuh puts all in my         pickup truck."           12.) FAR - (noun) - A conflagration.         Usage: "If my brother from Jawjuh don't change the all in my pickup         truck, that thing's gonna catch far."           13.) TAR - (noun) - A rubber wheel.         Usage: "Gee, I hope that brother of mine from Jawjuh don't git a flat tar in my pickup truck."           14.) TIRE - (noun) - A tall monument.         Usage: "Lord willin' and the creek don't rise, I sure do hope to see that        Eiffel Tire in Paris sometime."           15.) RETARD - (verb) - To stop working.         Usage: "My grampaw retard at age 65."           16.) FAT - (noun), (verb) - a battle or combat; to engage in battle or        combat.         Usage: "You younguns keep fat'n, n' ah'm gonna whup y'uh."           17.) RATS - (noun) - Entitled power or privilege.         Usage: "We Southerners are willin' to fat for are rats."           18.) CHEER - (adverb) In this place.         Usage: "Just set that bare rat cheer".           19.) FARN - (adjective) - Not domestic.         Usage: "I cuddint unnerstand a wurd he sed .. must be from some farn        country."           20.) DID - (adjective) - Not alive.         Usage: "He's did, Jim."           21.) ARE - (noun) - A colorless, odorless gas containing oxygen.           Usage: "He cain't breathe ... give 'im some ARE!"           22.) BOB WAR - (noun) - A sharp, twisted cable.         Usage: "Boy, stay away from that bob war fence."           23.) JEW HERE - (noun) and (verb) contraction.         Usage: "Jew here that my brother from Jawjuh got a job with         that bob war fence cump'ny?"           24.) HAZE - a contraction.         Usage: "Is Bubba smart?" "Nah .... haze ignert. He ain't thanked but         a minnit'n 'is laf."           25.) SEED -(verb) - past tense of "to see".         Usage: "I ain't never seed New York City". ---           26.) VIEW - contraction (verb) and pronoun.         Usage: "I ain't never seed New York City ... view?"           27.) GUBMINT - (noun) - A bureaucratic institution.         Usage: "Them gubmint boys shore is ignert     Charles Mims http://www.the-sandbox.org

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