A math teacher liked to launch into a really bad Elvis Presley
impersonation to liven up his class. He usually began class with
singing, "Solve Me Tender," and end it by saying, "Thank yew. Thank yew
veruh much," doing his best to sound like the King.

His performances were always greeted with groans and rolling  eyes.
During one grueling afternoon, his class was listless and
unresponsive. "If you guys don't get with it," he warned, "I'm gonna do
my Elvis!"

Then came a voice from the back. "Sir," one student pleaded, "don't be
cruel."

 
Greg Hopper
 
"Why is it that when we talk to God we're said
to be praying, but when God talks to us
we're schizophrenic?"
- Lily Tomlin -
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