[Sndbox] Christmas Cake

[Charles]

Christmas Cake ~ attributed to Red Skelton   1 cup of water 1 tsp baking soda 1 cup of sugar 1 tsp salt 1 cup of brown sugar lemon juice 4 large eggs nuts 1 bottle of rum 2 cups of dried fruit Sample the rum to check quality. Take a large bowl, check the rum again. To be sure it is of the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink. Repeat. Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add one teaspoon of sugar. Beat again. At this point it's best to make sure the rum is shtill ok Try another cup...just in case Turn off the mixerer thingy. Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit. Pick the frigging fruit off floor. Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers just pry it loose with drewscriver. Sample the rum to check for ton sisticicity. Next, sift two cups of salt. or something. Who cares. Check the rum. Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table. Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink.  Whatever you can find.  Greash the oven. Place the smixture into a sorcerpan--that's like a phlyingpan with higher sidesss---turn the sorcerpan 360 degrees and try not to fall over. Don't forget to beat off the turner. Fi nally, throw the bowl through the window, Finish the rum and call it a day. CHERRY MISTMAS

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