The Perks of Being Over 50
1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.
2. In a hostage situation, you are likely to be released first.
3. No one expects you to run into a burning building.
4. People call at 9 PM and ask, "Did I wake you?"
5. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.
6. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.
7. Things you buy now won't wear out.
8. You can eat dinner at 4 PM.
9. You can live without sex but not without glasses.
10. You enjoy hearing about other people's operations.
11. You get into heated arguments about pension plans.
12. You have a party and the neighbors don't even realize it.
13. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
14. You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into
the room.
15. You sing along with the elevator music.
16. Your eyes won't get much worse.
17. Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.
18. Your joints are more accurate
meteorologists than the national weather service.
19. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember
them either.
20. Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size. Games
for When We Are Older
1. Sag -- you're it.
2. Pin the toupee on the bald guy.
3. Twenty questions shouted into your good ear.
4. Kick the bucket.
5. Red Rover, Red Rover, the nurse says bend over.
6. Doc Doc Goose.
7. Simon says something incoherent.
8. Hide and go pee.
9. Spin the Bottle of Mylanta.
10. Musical recliners.
1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.
2. In a hostage situation, you are likely to be released first.
3. No one expects you to run into a burning building.
4. People call at 9 PM and ask, "Did I wake you?"
5. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.
6. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.
7. Things you buy now won't wear out.
8. You can eat dinner at 4 PM.
9. You can live without sex but not without glasses.
10. You enjoy hearing about other people's operations.
11. You get into heated arguments about pension plans.
12. You have a party and the neighbors don't even realize it.
13. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
14. You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into
the room.
15. You sing along with the elevator music.
16. Your eyes won't get much worse.
17. Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.
18. Your joints are more accurate
meteorologists than the national weather service.
19. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember
them either.
20. Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size. Games
for When We Are Older
1. Sag -- you're it.
2. Pin the toupee on the bald guy.
3. Twenty questions shouted into your good ear.
4. Kick the bucket.
5. Red Rover, Red Rover, the nurse says bend over.
6. Doc Doc Goose.
7. Simon says something incoherent.
8. Hide and go pee.
9. Spin the Bottle of Mylanta.
10. Musical recliners.
Charles Mims
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