*Aid worker: I was drugged and raped by another humanitarian in South Sudan/ The Guardian 29.07.15* Megan Nobert
Megan Nobert was sexually assaulted by a fellow humanitarian working for a UN supplier. She hopes her story will start a discussion about this neglected issueSecret aid worker: sexual harassment and discrimination in the industry I want to tell my story to break the silence surrounding the problem of sexual violence against humanitarian workers. We, as humanitarians, do not talk about this much, but every now and then the issue sneaks on to the news agenda. By telling my case here, I hope to contribute to a much-needed debate about what can be done to tackle this problem. While on mission for a humanitarian organisation in South Sudan, I was drugged and sexually assaulted by a member of the humanitarian community. I was given a combination of cocaine, codeine, morphine and oxycodone. I blacked out early that evening and don’t remember exactly what happened to me; all I have is the memory of waking up early, naked and alone in my accommodation, violently ill from the drugs I had not consented to taking. Every woman I have spoken to over the past few months has some story about the sexual violence or harassment I lost between 4 and 6 hours that night, and, while part of me is grateful that the darkness means I do not have to relive the memory of what was done to me, part of me will also always wonder what exactly did happen. I do not expect to ever get the answer to that question. I am in no way suggesting that sexual violence against humanitarian workers is in any way more important or more prevalent than acts of sexual violence committed against people in the local community. This is particularly true in South Sudan, where there have been horrendous stories of rape and sexual assault by all parties to the current conflict. My work in Africa’s newest country was focused on conflict resolution and gender-based violence. I believe that sexual violence in general, against all genders , needs more attention. However, when we are talking about sexual violence in conflict we cannot overlook the part of the equation that involves humanitarian workers. The sexual violence occurring in humanitarian field sites right now ranges from sexual harassment to sexual assault. While this can occur against both male and female humanitarian workers, it is a particular problem for women. Every woman I have spoken to over the past few months has had some story about the sexual violence or harassment they experienced while on mission. All too often these stories remain untold. Ignoring the issue will not make it go away. We need to be proactive. We need to ensure that humanitarian workers know the risks they are facing and what is available in terms of services and support should the worst happen. Most organisations would not send humanitarian workers into the field before discussing with them how to handle an incident of shelling or how to react when gunshots are heard. Why do we treat the risk of sexual violence differently? I wasn’t given any training on how to prevent or handle acts of sexual violence. I have also never been told about any policies or procedures that might exist to handle complaints of sexual violence. I have made my peace with the fact that what we think of as traditional justice will not happen in my case. I was assaulted in South Sudan, where the legal system does not typically offer true justice in sexual assault cases. Based on my experience in the country, I believe that even if I reported the crime to relevant authorities, I would have simply been subject to questions about my behaviour and unsubtle suggestions that I probably deserved my attack. My assaulter worked for a sub-contractor employed by a United Nations agency. Under Section 2.5 of the United Nation’s General Conditions of Contracts for the Provision of Goods and Services, the agency has no responsibility for the actions of the employees of its vendors. This is the conclusion that the agency came to when I approached them to file a complaint of sexual assault, the only recourse available to me at the time. Before I was able to file a complaint with the sub-contractor, I was told that the UN agency requested that my assaulter be fired. I do not believe there was any malice intended in this request; it did however deny me the opportunity to pursue the only vaguely legal pathway available to me, the only formal acknowledgement that what happened to me was wrong. Deciding to speak out in this way was not an easy decision and I absolutely understand why women do not come forward after similar experiences. It is painfully emotional and, at times, humiliating to have to tell my story over and over again. The past five months have been the hardest of my life and there have been days when it takes every ounce of strength to keep from crying and to get out of bed. These days are thankfully getting fewer, and telling the people in my life has eased my trauma considerably. So has speaking to a therapist, which I am lucky enough to be able to provide for myself. When we are talking about sexual violence in conflict we cannot overlook the part that involves humanitarian workers So what do I think needs to happen now? First, we need to acknowledge there is a problem of sexual violence against humanitarian workers. Second, we need to better integrate training on how to handle acts and complaints about sexual violence, as well as develop better policies around the issue. Lastly, we need to stop the impunity that currently exists when accusations of sexual violence are made, and fill legal loopholes over responsibility where they exist. Above all, we need to be proactive. It likely would have been easier, emotionally and mentally, to keep this to myself, or just to those closest to me. However humanitarian workers need a safe place to speak out, and if this helps just one other survivor find their voice, or prevents just one act of sexual violence, I think speaking about what happened to me will have been worth it. Megan Nobert is starting a survey with the International Women’s Rights Project to determine the extent of the sexual violence problem within the humanitarian community email [email protected] for more information. • If you are have been affected by the story in this article, Rape Crisis England and Wales or Rape, Abuse, Incest National Networkcan provide support. 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