I don't know. That's not a good sign, is it? ;-)
I have compiled SQLite and added libsqlite.o and sqlite.h to the project items in XCode.
Do you mean libsqlite.a?
Do you have libsqlite3.dylib (or something like it) in /usr/local/lib? ... alternatively, try otool -L on the compiled binary produced by Xcode.
If you are dynamically linking SQLite, try building it statically (see the list archives -- I posed how to do this a few days ago). It may be that you are running into a dynamic linking issue.
b.bum