The Unique Indian ‘Q’ and my wife [image: http://holidaydecorationsandcollectibles.com/images/IndianCouple1.JPG] Judged by the snail’s pace at which the dreams of a decent existence are realised, Indians must obviously be the most patient people in the world. But this monumental patience is conspicuous by its absence in a queue which makes Indian queues unique.
[image: http://marichulambino.files.wordpress.com/2008/09/photographer-not-named-pakistanis-wait-in-line-to-receive-food-as-aid.jpg] This uniqueness of ‘Q’ behaviour, common to all Indians is the best evidence of our heavily hyped unity in diversity. The world over, a queue is meant to be a line of people standing one behind another, keeping a respectable distance between them; but not so in India. [image: http://www.ssa.gov/deposit/img/directdeposit.gif] Here, it could be a small or a big crowd of pushing, pulling, jostling, elbowing and, therefore, profusely sweating people yelling at one another for no obvious reason other than reaching the counter ahead of others. Be it a railway station or a post office, if there is no pigeonhole at the counter where business is transacted, it is a sure recipe for total anarchy. [image: http://publib.boulder.ibm.com/infocenter/radhelp/v6r0m1/topic/com.ibm.etools.animgif.doc/images/skiing.gif] If you happen to belong to the rare species of sticklers for the normal ‘Q’ manners and, therefore, want to join the ‘Q’ by taking your position behind the last man, you are in for a big shock because you will never locate the head or tail of this apology for a ‘Q’. [image: http://static.howstuffworks.com/gif/willow/ant-info2.gif] All you can see is a crowd leaning over the counter with craning necks and outstretched hands waving money, or whatever is required to transact business, in a desperate attempt to attract the attention of the man at the counter who, in turn, enjoys the temporary feeling of importance he gets from this anarchy. Therefore, if you are naive enough to appeal to the man at the counter to use his power and authority to bring a semblance of sanity to this absolutely crazy situation, you will be greeted with a look of derision by not only this worthy but also the crowd. Of course, people may be standing one behind another; but packed like sardines with absolutely no space in between as an abundant precaution against ‘Q’ jumpers. [image: http://www.funmunch.com/events/patricks/st_patricks_day_graphics/st_patricks_day_animated_gifs/st_patricks_day_animated_gif_2.gif] Near the counter, you can invariably see three people, one on either side of the person transacting business through the pigeonhole. If you are not near the counter you will have no clue as to who are the second and third persons in the ‘Q’. But it is here that a unique code of conduct is put to great use. The second person is the one who has managed to squeeze in a part of his forearm or at least a couple of fingers with money clutched in between through the leftover space in the pigeonhole. The size of the leftover space is variable as it depends on the circumference of the forearm of the guy transacting business. [image: http://www.michaellariccia.com/images/blackmane-animation(500).gif] The other guy is, of course, the third in the ‘Q’. When one transaction is over, the fourth guy will occupy the space on the side vacated by the second person. This manoeuvre has to be executed with great dexterity and lightning speed because it also involves a competition with the other guy, the third one, who had already been standing by the side of the guy who had transacted business, to get a share of the space in the pigeonhole. That is to say, the fourth person can become the second person if he wins the struggle with the third person to get the balance space in the pigeonhole. Altercations have so embarrassed my wife that she has stopped accompanying me to places where one has to join a ‘Q’. [image: http://www.steroidco.info/images3/animated.gif] Sriram Savarkar © Hinduism is more a way of life than a method of worship. Dharmo Rakshati Rakshithaha If you protect Dharma, Dharma will in turn protect you. Hindus, If people slap you once, slap them twice! -- ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ OWNER : [email protected]; [!! Sriram Savarkar ¡¡] ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google Groups "Sriram Savarkar" group. To modify your list subscription, please send a blank email to: For posting Messages: [email protected] Subscribe : [email protected] Unsubscribe : [email protected] Visit Group : http://groups.google.com/group/sriram-savarkar?hl=en
